Dejected But Not Rejected

1 David departed from there and escaped to the cave of Adullam. And when his brothers and all his father’s house heard it, they went down there to him. And everyone who was in distress, and everyone who was in debt, and everyone who was bitter in soul, gathered to him. And he became commander over them. And there were with him about four hundred men.

And David went from there to Mizpeh of Moab. And he said to the king of Moab, “Please let my father and my mother stay with you, till I know what God will do for me.” And he left them with the king of Moab, and they stayed with him all the time that David was in the stronghold. Then the prophet Gad said to David, “Do not remain in the stronghold; depart, and go into the land of Judah.” So David departed and went into the forest of Hereth. – 1 Samuel 22:1-5  ESV

David left Gath in a hurry, the drool still clinging to his beard and the laughter of the Philistines still ringing in his ears. He had managed to escape with his life but was forced to leave his dignity behind. He had put himself in a very dangerous predicament and been forced to feign insanity when his plan fell apart. But despite the less-than-positive outcome of his plan to seek refuge in Gath, David was learning to trust in God and not himself. This would prove to be a lifelong endeavor, but with each passing circumstance, David learned to lean less on himself and more on God.

His trip to Gath would not be the last time David found himself in a tight spot. In fact, during the fugitive phase of his life, suffering, rejection, and ridicule would become familiar experiences. He recorded the feelings of loneliness and dejection that often haunted him in one of his psalms.

But I am a worm and not a man.
    I am scorned and despised by all!
Everyone who sees me mocks me.
    They sneer and shake their heads, saying,
“Is this the one who relies on the Lord?
    Then let the Lord save him!
If the Lord loves him so much,
    let the Lord rescue him!” – Psalm 22:6-8 NLT

David would know what it was like to be despised by others and wrestle with feeling abandoned by God. He would experience many moments of doubt and despair but, through it all, he would discover the reality of God’s persistent presence and power. In time, through all the trials of his life, David would learn what it means to trust God.

After having escaped from Gath by the skin of his teeth, David headed east to an isolated region called Adullam, the former site of an ancient Canaanite city. Adullam was not far from the valley of Elah, where David defeated Goliath. The area is pockmarked with caves, many of which are large enough to hold up to 400 men. It was in one of these caves that David sought refuge but he would not be alone for long. Somehow, his father and brothers received word of David’s location and they made their way to him, along with their entire households.

David’s cave was filling up fast and it would soon be standing room only. The text states that “all who were down on their luck came around—losers and vagrants and misfits of all sorts” (1 Samuel 22:2 MSG). David suddenly found himself surrounded by a motley crew of debtors, malcontents, and social miscreants, who each shared one thing in common: A general dislike for King Saul. In one way or another, this man’s reign had negatively impacted them and they were willing to risk all to throw in their lot with David, a man with a bounty on his head. Just showing up at the cave in Adullam made them guilty of aiding and abetting a fugitive.

It’s not difficult to discern why these disgruntled Israelites chose to throw in their lot with David. They had each experienced some aspect of Saul’s oppressive rule and were ready for a change. The foreboding words of Samuel the prophet, spoken before Saul was even anointed as king, must have rung in their ears as they made their way to Adullam.

“This is how a king will reign over you,” Samuel said. “The king will draft your sons and assign them to his chariots and his charioteers, making them run before his chariots. Some will be generals and captains in his army, some will be forced to plow in his fields and harvest his crops, and some will make his weapons and chariot equipment. The king will take your daughters from you and force them to cook and bake and make perfumes for him. He will take away the best of your fields and vineyards and olive groves and give them to his own officials. He will take a tenth of your grain and your grape harvest and distribute it among his officers and attendants. He will take your male and female slaves and demand the finest of your cattle and donkeys for his own use. He will demand a tenth of your flocks, and you will be his slaves. – 1 Samuel 8:11-17 NLT

Oppressed, overtaxed, and outraged by their treatment by Saul, these disenfranchised Israelites chose to align themselves with the disgraced and equally disillusioned David. Just hours earlier, David had been surrounded by hostile Philistines. Now, he was surrounded by disgruntled and desperate Hebrews, who were looking to him for leadership and direction.

The text tells us that 400 men allied themselves with David and viewed him as their commander. He was no longer alone, but now he found himself responsible for the well-being and protection of hundreds of men and their families. How would he feed them all? How was he going to be able to protect them from the professional soldiers sent by Saul to hunt him down? Whether he liked it or not, David suddenly found himself thrust into the role of leader once again. But these were not well-trained soldiers equipped with the latest military weapons; they were nothing more than peasants, farmers, and common laborers. This amalgam of human flotsam and jetsam would put David’s leadership abilities to the test, but it was within this crucible of crisis that God chose to purify and perfect the man whom He had chosen to be the next king of Israel.

One of the first decisions David made was to send his father and mother to stay in the land of Moab. He arranged for the King of Moab to provide his parents with a safe haven, “until I know what God is going to do for me” (1 Samuel 22:3 NLT). David’s great-grandmother, Ruth, had been a Moabitess, so there was a familial connection that explains David’s decision. His parents would remain in Moab until he had a better idea as to what God had in store for him.

David had learned a painful lesson at Gath and he was slowly learning to seek God’s will. Taking matters into his own hands and trying to determine his fate apart from God had proved to be a dangerous game to play. He had no clue what the future held, but he was anxious to know what God had in mind, and he didn’t have to wait long.

One day, a prophet appeared at the cave and gave David a word from God. He was to leave immediately and return to the land of Judah. This would not be the last time during David’s wilderness wanderings that God would speak to him through a prophet. God had not left David alone, and He would not leave him directionless.

It’s important to remember that David had been anointed by Samuel to be the next king of Israel. It is still not clear whether David was aware of this fact. Up until this point in the narrative, there is no indication that David had ever been told by Samuel what his anointing had meant. David has shown no signs that he knew he was the king-in-waiting. He had been content to be a commander in Saul’s army. He had shown no aspirations of being king or any expectations that God was going to remove Saul and put him in his place on the throne. Yet, God had chosen David to be the next king of Israel. So why did God choose to put David on this precarious and potentially deadly path to the throne? Why was he allowing Saul to persecute and pursue David? Why was David being forced to run for his life and live like a fugitive? Why was God willing to allow Saul to retain the crown and use his royal resources to harass David?

None of this seems to make any sense. It all appears illogical and unnecessary. But God’s ways are not our ways. His plans rarely make sense to us. His methods, more often than not, come across as little more than madness to us. But the life of David is meant to reveal the sovereign, all-powerful, all-knowing nature of God. David was receiving God’s will one day at a time; he wasn’t given the whole picture. The reader can view the full scope of David’s life and know how the story ends. But for David, each day was a mystery. He had no assurances. He couldn’t read ahead and learn how his life story was going to turn out. Yet, God was there, and David would learn to see Him in the middle of all the madness and messiness of life.

David was going to experience many dark days. He would know what it means to despair and feel the loneliness that comes with leadership. There would be moments when all seemed lost and there would be days when he felt abandoned by God. He would even put his thoughts of desperation in writing.

My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?
    Why are you so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning?
O my God, I cry by day, but you do not answer,
    and by night, but I find no rest.

Yet you are holy,
    enthroned on the praises of Israel.
In you our fathers trusted;
    they trusted, and you delivered them.
To you they cried and were rescued;
    in you they trusted and were not put to shame. – Psalm 22:1-5 NLT

Through it all, David would discover the holiness and faithfulness of God. This lesson, while painful, would be crucial to his transformation from a shepherd of sheep to the shepherd of God’s people.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Who Am I and the Great I Am

1 Now Moses was keeping the flock of his father-in-law, Jethro, the priest of Midian, and he led his flock to the west side of the wilderness and came to Horeb, the mountain of God. And the angel of the Lord appeared to him in a flame of fire out of the midst of a bush. He looked, and behold, the bush was burning, yet it was not consumed. And Moses said, “I will turn aside to see this great sight, why the bush is not burned.” When the Lord saw that he turned aside to see, God called to him out of the bush, “Moses, Moses!” And he said, “Here I am.” Then he said, “Do not come near; take your sandals off your feet, for the place on which you are standing is holy ground.” And he said, “I am the God of your father, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob.” And Moses hid his face, for he was afraid to look at God.

Then the Lord said, “I have surely seen the affliction of my people who are in Egypt and have heard their cry because of their taskmasters. I know their sufferings, and I have come down to deliver them out of the hand of the Egyptians and to bring them up out of that land to a good and broad land, a land flowing with milk and honey, to the place of the Canaanites, the Hittites, the Amorites, the Perizzites, the Hivites, and the Jebusites. And now, behold, the cry of the people of Israel has come to me, and I have also seen the oppression with which the Egyptians oppress them. 10 Come, I will send you to Pharaoh that you may bring my people, the children of Israel, out of Egypt.” 11 But Moses said to God, “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the children of Israel out of Egypt?” 12 He said, “But I will be with you, and this shall be the sign for you, that I have sent you: when you have brought the people out of Egypt, you shall serve God on this mountain.” – Exodus 3:1-12 ESV

Moses is living in the land of Midian, on the far side of the Gulf of Aqaba. He has married a daughter of Jethro, the priest of Midian, and settled into his new life as a husband, father, and sheep herder. Moses has experienced a great deal of change since leaving Egypt. Long gone are the fine clothes and gourmet meals served in regal splendor in the Pharaoh’s palace. He was once a member of the royal family, but now he is a murderer and a fugitive from justice. He finds himself living on the lam in a distant land and relegated to the lowly role of a common shepherd. Safely ensconced hundreds of miles away from the scene of his crime, Moses is oblivious to all that is taking place back in Egypt. He has no way of knowing that, in his absence, the suffering of his fellow Hebrews has increased significantly. He may be living in relative peace and security, but they are not.

the Israelites continued to groan under their burden of slavery. They cried out for help, and their cry rose up to God. – Exodus 2:23 NLT

It’s interesting to note that Moses, the author of the book of Exodus, penned these words long after the events took place. Somewhere between the exodus of the people from Egypt and their arrival in the land of Canaan, God inspired Moses to record all the events that led up to his calling as God’s deliverer. He is writing from a different vantage point which enables him to look back with clarity and see how the hand of God was orchestrating every phase of his life.

While he was living in Midian, he had no concept of the difficult circumstances under which his parents, siblings, and fellow Israelites were being forced to endure. In retrospect, he writes that they were suffering so greatly that they cried out for help. They were desperately praying for someone to deliver them from their pain and misery. And he states that “their cry rose up to God” (Exodus 2:23 NLT).

God heard their groaning, and he remembered his covenant promise to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. He looked down on the people of Israel and knew it was time to act. – Exodus 2:24-25 NLT

Moses was oblivious, but God was not. Moses was ignorant of their plight, but God was fully aware. Moses could not hear their cries, but God not only heard, but He decided to do something about it. It was time to act.

And what Moses didn’t realize at the time, was that he was going to play a major role in God’s unfolding drama of deliverance.

At the same time that God heard the cries of His people, He made a surprise visit to Moses. Unhindered by time or space, God was able to hear and act. But this does not mean that God was reacting to what He heard. He was responding as if He had just become aware of the Israelites’ plight. He had known all along that they would suffer, and He already had a plan and an appointed time in which He would act.

Centuries earlier, God had told broken the news to Abraham that his descendants would one day end up living in a foreign land as slaves.

Know for certain that your offspring will be sojourners in a land that is not theirs and will be servants there, and they will be afflicted for four hundred years. – Genesis 15:13 ESV

This prophecy had a timeline attached to it, and the end date had come. Four hundred years had passed, which meant it was time to implement the second phase of His promise.

But I will bring judgment on the nation that they serve, and afterward they shall come out with great possessions. – Genesis 15:14 ESV

The persecution of the Israelites was about to end and the judgment of the Egyptians was about to begin. But before any of that could happen, God needed to notify the one He was going to use to bring it all about, and that happened to be Moses.

The scene for this divine encounter was a place called Mount Horeb, located in the southern region of the Sinai Peninsula. It lies opposite the land of Midian, on the other side of the Gulf of Aqaba. The memory of that life-altering day has been seared into Moses’ brain. Writing in the third person, Moses vividly recalls exactly what he was doing when God showed up.

Moses was keeping the flock of his father-in-law, Jethro, the priest of Midian, and he led his flock to the west side of the wilderness and came to Horeb, the mountain of God. – Exodus 3:1 ESV

His reference to Horeb as “the mountain of God” is a hint that the much older and wiser Moses is the one recording this story. The Moses shepherding sheep near the base of Horeb would have had no reason to see this particular mountain as holy or associated with Jehovah. It was just another mountain in the middle of the wilderness of Sinai. But Moses, the author, is hinting that this place is about to become a sacred spot in his life and that of the people of Israel, Mount Horeb, also known as Mount Sinai would become the place where God revealed Himself to His chosen people, and it would begin with Moses.

Moses, the shepherd, suddenly stumbles upon a startling scene.

…the angel of the Lord appeared to him in a flame of fire out of the midst of a bush. He looked, and behold, the bush was burning, yet it was not consumed. – Exodus 3:2 ESV

It seems that Moses saw the bush before he ever saw the angel of the Lord. He came upon this flame-engulfed shrub and noticed that it kept on burning as if fueled by some outside source. The brittle branches of the bush were not consumed by the heat of the fire, and Moses was forced to take a closer look. And as Moses stepped forward, God spoke up.

Moses! Moses!…Do not come any closer…Take off your sandals, for you are standing on holy ground.” – Exodus 3:4-5 NLT

Moses was stunned to hear a voice emanating from the middle of the burning bush. It completely caught him off guard. And then he received a second and even more discomforting shock when the disembodied voice introduced itself.

“I am the God of your father—the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob.” – Exodus 3:6 NLT

And recalling that incredible moment, Moses records that he “covered his face because he was afraid to look at God” (Exodus 3:6 NLT). It can’t be ignored that Moses knew he was a murderer, and to find himself standing before the holy and wholly righteous God of his ancestors must have left him in paralyzing fear. He was in the presence of God Almighty, the maker of heaven and earth. He was under the gaze of the judge of the universe and he stood condemned before Him. But God was not there to condemn Moses; He was there to call him.

“I have certainly seen the oppression of my people in Egypt. I have heard their cries of distress because of their harsh slave drivers. Yes, I am aware of their suffering. So I have come down to rescue them from the power of the Egyptians and lead them out of Egypt into their own fertile and spacious land. – Exodus 3:7-8 NLT

For the first time since leaving Egypt, Moses receives an update concerning the situation back home, and it came from the lips of God Himself. The Lord wanted Moses to know that things were not going well but that He already had a plan in place that would guarantee not only their deliverance but the inheritance of their own homeland. Moses would have been familiar with the stories of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. He probably heard his birthmother tell of God’s covenant promises regarding the land of Canaan. Now, God was assuring this displaced Hebrew that those promises were about to be fulfilled.

And just in case Moses isn’t quite sure what “fertile and spacious land” God is talking about, the Lord provides clarification.

It is a land flowing with milk and honey—the land where the Canaanites, Hittites, Amorites, Perizzites, Hivites, and Jebusites now live.” – Exodus 3:8 NLT

In other words, the descendants of Jacob, who had arrived in Egypt 400 years earlier, were about to return to Canaan. They were going home. But for that to happen, God was going to need a deliverer/leader who could act as His representative. And what Moses didn’t realize at the time was that he was God’s choice.

“Look! The cry of the people of Israel has reached me, and I have seen how harshly the Egyptians abuse them. Now go, for I am sending you to Pharaoh. You must lead my people Israel out of Egypt.” – Exodus 3:9-10 NLT

This news must have hit Moses like a brick to the forehead. What in the world was God thinking? Why would Jehovah choose a convicted murderer and the disinherited adoptive son of Pharaoh to lead His people? When Moses left Egypt, he was disliked by Egyptians and Hebrews alike. Yet, here was God issuing Moses a summons to enter His service. This was not an invitation to be accepted, but a call to be obeyed.

But Moses responded to God’s call with a simple three-word statement: “Who am I?”

Moses knew exactly who he was. He was the son of Amram and Jochebed, two obscure Hebrews who had been forced to give up their son and watch him be raised by Egyptians. He was a well-read and sophisticated byproduct of the Egyptian educational system. He was a convicted murderer and a fugitive from justice. As far as he could tell, he broke every HR protocol for hiring effective leaders. He had no business standing before Pharaoh, especially with a bounty on his head. And he was the worst possible candidate for taking on the extraction of a disenfranchised and disheartened people group. But Moses was about to learn that arguing with God was both pointless and unproductive. His reluctance, disqualifying resume, and debilitating fear were irrelevant. God assured Moses:

“I will be with you. And this is your sign that I am the one who has sent you: When you have brought the people out of Egypt, you will worship God at this very mountain.” – Exodus 3:12 NLT

The problem had been revealed. The plan for its solution had been disclosed. And the person to implement it had been called. But Moses would prove to be a tough sell. “Who am I” had just had a personal encounter with the great “I am” and his life would never be the same.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.