godly sorrow

It Is Not God.

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Set the trumpet to your lips! One like a vulture is over the house of the Lord, because they have transgressed my covenant and rebelled against my law. To me they cry, “My God, we — Israel — know you.” Israel has spurned the good; the enemy shall pursue him. They made kings, but not through me. They set up princes, but I knew it not. With their silver and gold they made idols for their own destruction. I have spurned your calf, O Samaria. My anger burns against them. How long will they be incapable of innocence? For it is from Israel; a craftsman made it; it is not God. The calf of Samaria shall be broken to pieces. – Hosea 8:1-6 ESV

Ever since the split of the kingdom, the northern nation of Israel had made a habit of ignoring God, transgressing His covenant and rebelling against His law. It had all begun with King Jeroboam’s disastrous decision to make his own gods, in an attempt to keep the people from going back to Jerusalem in the south to worship.

So the king took counsel and made two calves of gold. And he said to the people, “You have gone up to Jerusalem long enough. Behold your gods, O Israel, who brought you up out of the land of Egypt.” And he set one in Bethel, and the other he put in Dan. Then this thing became a sin, for the people went as far as Dan to be before one. He also made temples on high places and appointed priests from among all the people, who were not of the Levites. – 1 Kings 12:28-31 ESV

Jeroboam had deemed himself a god-maker and led the entire nation into idolatry. And now, years later, after decades of unfaithfulness to God, the Assyrians were poised, ready to wreak destruction on the people of Israel – as part of God’s punishment for their blatant forsaking of Him as their god. But now that their world was falling apart, they had suddenly decided to call on God, saying , “My God, we — Israel — know you.” But nothing could have been further from the truth. Had they truly known God, they would not have committed the blatant acts of unfaithfulness that had marked their brief and less-than-stellar history. They had appointed kings without God’s approval. They had set over themselves princes and leaders without seeking God’s direction. And the original two golden calves had not been the only idols they erected and worshiped. Idols to Baal and other false gods were located throughout the kingdom.

But God condemned their idols, made with human hands, and He declared, “It is not God.” They were going to discover the simple truth behind that statement as they called out to their false gods in hopes of escaping the wrath of the Assyrian army. And when their idols failed to provide them with a miracle of deliverance, they would finally turn to God. But it would prove too little, too late. Their return would not be heartfelt and would lack true repentance. Their sorrow was not for their sins against God, but because of their circumstances. They weren’t repentant. They were simply remorseful. And their calling on God was nothing more than a last-minute attempt to escape the disaster looming over them.

It is not God. That is the key lesson they were to learn. Their false gods were not gods at all. They were man-made objects lacking life and devoid of any ability to provide help or hope. Their golden calves would end up broken and destroyed. Their places of worship would be torn down. Their reliance upon Egypt and other foreign powers would prove futile. Their real hope should have been in God alone. As the psalmist wrote, “Some nations boast of their chariots and horses, but we boast in the name of the LORD our God” (Psalms 20:7 NLT). The prophet Isaiah warned against placing your trust in anything other than God. “What sorrow awaits those who look to Egypt for help, trusting their horses, chariots, and charioteers and depending on the strength of human armies instead of looking to the LORD, the Holy One of Israel” (Isaiah 31:1 NLT).

But how easy it is to trust in what we can see. How quickly we can turn to those things that appear to be real and worthy of our trust – instead of trusting in God. But as God’s people, we are to place all our confidence in Him. He is to be our strength, our comfort, protector and provider. But God is not to be treated like an in-case-of-emergency button. He doesn’t want to be our go-to God when all else fails. And yet, so often, we turn to God only after we have exhausted all other options. When we no longer have any tricks up our sleeves, we reach out to him for help. Our desperation prompts us to display an insincere form of remorse. But what God wants is true repentance, a brokenness of heart that causes us to reach out to Him in love and sincere sorrow. David said it well. “The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God” (Psalm 51:17 NLT). The prophet Joel provided a picture of the kind of response God desires from His people:

That is why the Lord says, “Turn to me now, while there is time. Give me your hearts. Come with fasting, weeping, and mourning. Don’t tear your clothing in your grief, but tear your hearts instead.” Return to the Lord your God, for he is merciful and compassionate, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love. He is eager to relent and not punish. Who knows? Perhaps he will give you a reprieve, sending you a blessing instead of this curse. Perhaps you will be able to offer grain and wine to the Lord your God as before. – Joel 2:12-14 NLT

God desires hearts that are sincerely sorrowful over their sin. He longs for His people to return to Him in heartfelt repentance, legitimately willing to turn from worshiping false gods and ready to place their hope in Him. If our only goal is to escape His judgment, we miss the point. If our repentance is not motivated by His love and a desire to be restored to a right relationship with Him, we are treating Him as nothing more than a get-out-of-jail-free card. Sometimes our difficulties and trials are an opportunity for us to realize that the thing we have been worshiping is not a god. The things we have been putting all our hope in is incapable of delivering what we have been expecting. It is not God. But He is. And He wants to be the God of our lives, providing hope, healing, help, and an ever-increasing holiness of character in our lives.

False Repentance.

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“Come, let us return to the Lord; for he has torn us, that he may heal us; he has struck us down, and he will bind us up. After two days he will revive us; on the third day he will raise us up, that we may live before him. Let us know; let us press on to know the Lord; his going out is sure as the dawn; he will come to us as the showers, as the spring rains that water the earth.”

What shall I do with you, O Ephraim? What shall I do with you, O Judah? Your love is like a morning cloud, like the dew that goes early away. Therefore I have hewn them by the prophets; I have slain them by the words of my mouth, and my judgment goes forth as the light. For I desire steadfast love and not sacrifice, the knowledge of God rather than burnt offerings.– Hosea 6:1-6 ESV

These opening verses of chapter six have a positive ring to them. It sounds as if the people of Israel are recognizing the nature of God’s redemptive punishment and are returning to Him in repentance. But as we will see in the verses that follow, any repentance they attempt to show will be short-lived. The words in these three verses are filled with truth and accurately reflect the nature of God. He was going to tear them in order that He might heal them. He would eventually strike them down so that He might build them up. But these verses are actually an indictment of the people of Israel and provide a prophetic look at what their pseudo-repentance will look like in the future. When the full weight of God’s discipline falls on them, they will feign repentance, thinking that it will shorten the length of their punishment. That is the message behind verse 2: “After two days he will revive us; on the third day he will raise us up, that we may live before him.” Their overly optimistic outlook regarding the brevity of their punishment reflects an ignorance of the depth of their sin. Like a child who says, “I’m sorry” hoping to escape the well-deserved discipline of his parents, the Israelites would try to appease God with false repentance.

In his letter to the church in Corinth, Paul referred to a previous letter he had written to them that contained some severe, corrective words. He had evidently received news that his words had hurt them. But he wrote and told them, “Now I am glad I sent it, not because it hurt you, but because the pain caused you to repent and change your ways. It was the kind of sorrow God wants his people to have, so you were not harmed by us in any way. For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death” (2 Corinthians 7:9-10 NLT). The worldly sorrow to which Paul referred is exactly what verses 1-3 in chapter six of Hosea are illustrating. The people will be sorry they got caught. They will be sorry that their actions have resulted in God’s divine discipline. But their sorrow will not lead them to true repentance.

In fact, there would be false prophets who would tell them that everything would be all right. They would try to convince the people that God was not all that mad and that His punishment would not be severe. Even after the northern kingdom of Israel fell, the southern kingdom of Judah would listen to the words of false prophets who showed up, promising good news instead of bad. God had some harsh words for these purveyors of positive motivational messages:

“Do not listen to these prophets when they prophesy to you, filling you with futile hopes. They are making up everything they say. They do not speak for the Lord! They keep saying to those who despise my word, ‘Don’t worry! The Lord says you will have peace!’ And to those who stubbornly follow their own desires, they say, ‘No harm will come your way!’” – Jeremiah 23:16-17 NLT

Later on in the book of Jeremiah, God’s words get even harsher:

“Do not listen to your false prophets, fortune-tellers, interpreters of dreams, mediums, and sorcerers who say, ‘The king of Babylon will not conquer you.’ They are all liars, and their lies will lead to your being driven out of your land. I will drive you out and send you far away to die.” – Jeremiah 27:9-10 NLT

The severity of God’s punishment reflects the depths of their sin. Just saying they were sorry would not be enough. Making a few token sacrifices in the hopes that God would be satisfied and hold off His judgment reflects an incredible misunderstanding of God’s hatred of sin. There are those today who think that hell is either a figment of man’s imagination and doesn’t exist at all or that it is merely symbolic, since, the falsely believe, a loving God would never torture someone for eternity. But both of those perceptions are false and reflect a gross misunderstanding of God and His attitude toward sin. The severity of hell should provide us with a vivid reminder of just how much God despises sin. And ultimately, the sin God despises most is man’s rejection of Him as God. It is a refusal to love, honor and obey Him as God. And concerning the people of Israel, whom God had made His own, He said, “For your love vanishes like the morning mist and disappears like dew in the sunlight” (Hosea 6:4b NLT). They had failed to return to God the love He had graciously shown them. After all He had done for them, in most cases in spite of them, they had rejected Him as their God.

What God wanted most was their love. And man’s love for God is best motivated by an understanding of the severity of his sin and that responds in wonder at God’s gracious and merciful provision of a way to be made right with Him despite his undeserving state. It was while we were sinners that Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). It was while we were hopelessly dead in our sins that God chose to give us life through Christ (Ephesians 2:5). That is why God called out to Israel, “I want you to show love, not offer sacrifices. I want you to know me more than I want burnt offerings” (Hosea 6:6 NLT).

God wanted true repentance. He was not interested in worldly sorrow or religious ritual done in the hopes of appeasing His wrath. King David said it best when he wrote Psalm 51 in the aftermath of his sordid affair with Bathsheba.

You do not desire a sacrifice, or I would offer one. You do not want a burnt offering. The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God. – Psalm 51:16-17 NLT

Israel was not yet broken. The hearts of the people had not returned to God. They feared punishment more than they loved God. And the sad truth is that, for too many of us today, any repentance we attempt to show is motivated by fear of God, not a love for Him. We simply want to escape judgment, not know Him better. We underestimate our sin and under-value His sacrificial love for us. But the more we understand the gravity of our sin, the more we will appreciate His gracious, merciful love and show godly sorrow that leads to true repentance.

Sin Against God.

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For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight, so that you may be justified in your words and blameless in your judgment. – Psalm 51:3-4 ESV

Psalm 51

Over in 2 Corinthians 7:10, the apostle Paul wrote about two kinds of sorrow. One he called “godly sorrow.” It is the kind of sorrow that God wants us to experience, because it leads us away from sin and results in salvation. And while it’s still sorrow, in the long run, it comes with no regrets. On the other hand, there is “worldly sorrow.” That kind of sorrow is superficial, lacking true repentance and ultimately results in spiritual death. It may appear genuine and be accompanied by true remorse, but remorse is nothing more than deep and painful regret for wrongdoing. It does not necessarily produce repentance, or a change in heart. Worldly sorrow may even result in nothing more than regret, a feeling of disappointment or dissatisfaction over what you have done. But again, if it is not accompanied with repentance, the end result will be spiritual death. Remorse and regret can only produce guilt and shame. Guilt and shame, by themselves, are destructive, rather than constructive.

David seemed to understand this truth. He had great sorrow over what he had done. He realized that his sin with Bathsheba was serious and that he deserved God’s punishment for it. I am sure he felt sorrow, regret, remorse, as well as guilt and shame for what he had done. Word had gotten out. His reputation had been sullied. He had gotten what he had wanted: Bathsheba as his wife, but not without great cost. He was stuck trying to continue the cover up of his sin, including Bathsheba’s pregnancy with the child from their immoral relationship. David knew he was responsible for the death of Bathsheba’s husband, Uriah. And he knew that Joab, his military commander and the one who carried out the death sentence, knew as well. David’s little house of cards was beginning to tremble all around him. Every night he went to be he couldn’t help but think about the gravity of what he had done. But with the help of Nathan the prophet, David was brought to his senses and convicted of his sin and his need for repentance. He had to return to God. David woke up to the fact that his sin had been against God. Yes, he had most definitely sinned against Uriah by having sex with his wife, then by attempting to deceive him by trying to get him to sleep with Bathsheba in order to cover up who was the true father of the child. David had sinned against Bathsheba as well, using his power and influence as king to coerce her to be unfaithful to her husband and commit adultery. But at the end of the day, David had to acknowledge that his sin had been against God. Which is why he prayed, “Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight.” David took ownership for what he had done and acknowledge that his actions had been against God. He had broken God’s laws. He had disobeyed God’s commands. And he recognized that God had every right to do with him as He saw fit. God would be fully justified to punish David for all he had done. Sin against God always comes with consequences and David knew it. And he was ready to accept whatever God decided to do.

But David had begun his prayer with a cry for mercy. He knew that he was at God’s mercy. God could do with him whatever he wanted and would have been justified in whatever punishment he deemed necessary. And David knew there was nothing he could do to rectify his problem. The deed was done. The sin had been committed. He couldn’t bring Uriah back to life. He couldn’t reverse the affair he had had with Bathsheba. And there she was, walking around the palace, carrying his child, as a daily reminder of his sin. That is why David had asked God to “Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin!” (Psalm 51:2 ESV). David was powerless to remedy his situation. But he knew that God could forgive him and cleanse him from the damaging influence of his own actions.

David needed to repent. He needed to turn back to God. His sin had created a barrier between he and God. Emotionally, he found himself separated from God. His guilt made it difficult to face God. His inability to fix what he had done allowed the enemy to step in and accuse him of his failure to remain faithful to God. All David would do was feel guilt for what he had done or attempt feel nothing, trying to rationalize his actions away and learn to minimize his sin. Fortunately, David repented. He turned away from his sin and back to the one who could help him do something about it. He turned to God. But to do so, he had to come in humility and with a heart ready to confess what he had done. No more running. No more ignoring. No more rationalizing and justifying. No more blame. It was time for godly sorrow, the kind that leads to repentance and restoration. God wants to restore. He wants to renew. But He requires that we come to Him with broken and contrite hearts. Later on in this same Psalm, David will express that very sentiment. “The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God” (Psalm 51:17 NLT). God desires to see our hearts truly repentant and ready to return to Him for help, hope and healing. We can’t fix what we have done, but He can.

Respond Justly.

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If there is famine in the land, if there is pestilence or blight or mildew or locust or caterpillar, if their enemy besieges them in the land at their gates, whatever plague, whatever sickness there is, whatever prayer, whatever plea is made by any man or by all your people Israel, each knowing the affliction of his own heart and stretching out his hands toward this house, then hear in heaven your dwelling place and forgive and act and render to each whose heart you know, according to all his ways (for you, you only, know the hearts of all the children of mankind), that they may fear you all the days that they live in the land that you gave to our fathers. – 1 Kings 8:37-40 ESV

1 Kings 8:22-53

At this point in his prayer, Solomon gives an expansive list of potential judgments of God brought on by the sins of the people. He lists famine, pestilence, blight, mildew, insect infestations, plague, sickness and enemy invasion. Solomon knew full well the litany of curses that God had promised to bring if the people of Israel proved to be unfaithful to Him. He had given them a complete list of possible judgments in the book of Deuteronomy. “But if you will not obey the voice of the Lord your God or be careful to do all his commandments and his statutes that I command you today, then all these curses shall come upon you and overtake you” (Deuteronomy 28:15 ESV). God’s list included:

Cursed shall be your basket and your kneading bowl.

Cursed shall be the And the heavens over your head shall be bronze, and the earth under you shall be iron.fruit of your womb and the fruit of your ground, the increase of your herds and the young of your flock.

Cursed shall you be when you come in, and cursed shall you be when you go out.

The Lord will send on you curses, confusion, and frustration in all that you undertake to do, until you are destroyed and perish quickly on account of the evil of your deeds, because you have forsaken me.

The Lord will make the pestilence stick to you until he has consumed you off the land that you are entering to take possession of it.

The Lord will strike you with wasting disease and with fever, inflammation and fiery heat, and with drought and with blight and with mildew. They shall pursue you until you perish.

And the heavens over your head shall be bronze, and the earth under you shall be iron.

The Lord will make the rain of your land powder. From heaven dust shall come down on you until you are destroyed.

The Lord will cause you to be defeated before your enemies. You shall go out one way against them and flee seven ways before them.

And the list goes on. But Solomon knew his God. He knew that if the people sinned and came under the judgment of God, they could turn to God for help. First they would have to know “the affliction of their heart” (1 Kings 8:38). When any Israelite became afflicted enough by the trouble he was experiencing and recognized that the cause of it was his own sin, it should result in him “stretching out his hands toward this house.” In other words, the discipline of God would cause Him to stretch out his hands to God for forgiveness. The imagery here is that of admission of guilt, confession of sin, and a cry for forgiveness. If they would only acknowledge their sin, turn from it, and return to the one who had chosen them as His own, He would forgive them.

Solomon asks God to hear. When these prayers of confession and repentance come to God’s attention, Solomon simply asks God to listen and then to respond justly. He trusted God to do the right thing because he knew that God was a just and righteous God. God alone knows the hearts of men. He knows the difference between true and false repentance. He can tell when someone is crying out simply to escape the pain of punishment, and when someone is legitimately remorseful and truly repentant. God had promised that “if my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land” (2 Chronicles 7:14 ESV). It is one thing to know the pain of your heart. It is another thing to humble yourself before the throne of God in repentance, taking ownership for your sin and willingly turning from it back to God. Solomon was counting on the fact that God had promised to hear, forgive and heal. He also knew that God’s punishment for sin, if responded to correctly, would produce a godly fear in the lives of those who returned to God in humble repentance. Paul described it this way: “For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death” (2 Corinthians 7:10 NLT). God’s punishment always has a purpose. He disciplines those whom He loves. He brings just judgment on those who belong to Him, in order that they might return to Him in sorrow and repentance. But like Solomon, we must understand that God knows our hearts. He can tell when our sorrow is sincere and when it is simply worldly sorrow, lacking in repentance. We have to be willing to turn from our sin and return to God. If our only motive is to escape judgment, we miss the point. If we don’t want God more than we want the pleasures of sin, we are not truly repentant. Godly sorrow results in salvation. Worldly sorrow results in death. God’s desire for us is a restored relationship with Him. He longs to bless us. But He also longs that we would desire Him more than we do His blessings.

2 Corinthians 7

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Godly Sorrow.

2 Corinthians 7

For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death. – 2 Corinthians 7:10 NLT

When one of my kids was just a little boy, and he would do something that resulted in my disappointment and his potential punishment, he would always respond in the same way. He would immediately say, “I’m sorry, dad!” Not once, but repeatedly – one right after the other. “I’m sorry, dad! Dad, I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” He seemed to believe that the more times he professed his sorrow, the more readily I would accept his apology and forego any kind of punishment. But while his apologies were always fervent, they were rarely sincere. There was one thing usually missing: Any sense of repentance. Oh, there was regret. He really was sorry. But only that he had been caught. He wasn’t sorry for what he had done. In fact, given enough time, he would usually repeat the same act again and follow it up with the same repetitive claim of sorrowful regret when found out.

Paul had had to write a “severe letter” to the church in Corinth. We are not told what the content or context of that letter entailed, but it had not been easy for Paul to write it. He had referred to this letter before by saying, “I wrote that letter in great anguish, with a troubled heart and many tears. I didn’t want to grieve you, but I wanted to let you know how much love I have for you” (2 Corinthians 2:4 NLT). The letter to which Paul is referring is not 1 Corinthians. It is a letter he penned sometime between the writing of 1st and 2nd Corinthians. In that lost third letter, Paul had reluctantly addressed some issues going on in the Corinthian church. After it was sent, he even went through some regret, fearing what he had said would prove to be too harsh and painful. But when he finally received word that his letter had produced repentance and changed behavior, he was glad he had sent it. What Paul had wanted all along from the Corinthians is the same thing I wanted from my son: Repentance. Godly sorrow – a sorrow that is produced in the life of an individual by God – always produces repentance, and repentance results in a change in behavior. The Greek word that Paul uses here that is translated repentance, actually means “to change one’s mind.” It conveys the idea of reversing your stance on an issue and admitting the error of your way. As a result, repentance results in a change in behavior. The sorrow Paul’s letter produced in the Corinthians was godly sorrow because it “leads us away from sin and results in salvation” (2 Corinthians 7:10 NLT). The salvation Paul is talking about here is not eternal salvation, but a temporal salvation or deliverance from a bad situation. This kind of sorrow comes without regret. Too often, we are only sorry for the effects our sins have produced or for the inconvenience of having been caught. But regret and repentance are not the same thing. Regret rarely produces a change in behavior because it never touches the heart. Worldly sorrow lacks repentance, and it leads to spiritual death in the form of resentment and bitterness.

It’s fairly easy to spot the difference between godly sorrow and worldly sorrow. Paul described it this way: “Just see what this godly sorrow produced in you! Such earnestness, such concern to clear yourselves, such indignation, such alarm, such longing to see me, such zeal, and such a readiness to punish wrong. You showed that you have done everything necessary to make things right” (2 Corinthians 7:11 NLT). Their sorrow produced a change in mind, which led to a change in behavior. They wanted to set things right. Their sorrow wasn’t short-lived, but long-lasting and real. “It was the kind of sorrow God wants his people to have” (2 Corinthians 7:9 NLT). Ultimately, God wants to bring joy to our lives, but sometimes He must begin the process by producing in us godly sorrow. We must learn to change our minds and see things from His perspective instead of our own. We must see sin the way He does. We must agree with His assessment of our lives and confess our sin and turn from it. We must repent. Godly sorrow produces repentance and results in a transformation in our character and conduct. And that’s something we will never end up regretting.

Father, thank You for lovingly bringing me so often to a point of godly sorrow. It is not something I pursue or desire. But I need it. I need Your help in changing my mind and seeing things from Your perspective. Too often, I can learn to view my behavior as perfectly fine and justify my actions as righteous and good. But then You convict me through Your Word and reveal the truth about my heart. That sorrow then produces repentance and result in a change in my behavior. Yes, it hurts, but it’s always for my good and results in Your glory. So don’t stop. Amen.

Ken Miller
Grow Pastor & Minister to Men
kenm@christchapelbc.org