Nahor

With Friends Like This…

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43 Then Laban answered and said to Jacob, “The daughters are my daughters, the children are my children, the flocks are my flocks, and all that you see is mine. But what can I do this day for these my daughters or for their children whom they have borne? 44 Come now, let us make a covenant, you and I. And let it be a witness between you and me.” 45 So Jacob took a stone and set it up as a pillar. 46 And Jacob said to his kinsmen, “Gather stones.” And they took stones and made a heap, and they ate there by the heap. 47 Laban called it Jegar-sahadutha, but Jacob called it Galeed. 48 Laban said, “This heap is a witness between you and me today.” Therefore he named it Galeed, 49 and Mizpah, for he said, “The Lord watch between you and me, when we are out of one another’s sight. 50 If you oppress my daughters, or if you take wives besides my daughters, although no one is with us, see, God is witness between you and me.”

51 Then Laban said to Jacob, “See this heap and the pillar, which I have set between you and me. 52 This heap is a witness, and the pillar is a witness, that I will not pass over this heap to you, and you will not pass over this heap and this pillar to me, to do harm. 53 The God of Abraham and the God of Nahor, the God of their father, judge between us.” So Jacob swore by the Fear of his father Isaac, 54 and Jacob offered a sacrifice in the hill country and called his kinsmen to eat bread. They ate bread and spent the night in the hill country.

55  Early in the morning Laban arose and kissed his grandchildren and his daughters and blessed them. Then Laban departed and returned home. – Genesis 31:43-55 ESV

Laban’s desperate search for his missing idols proved to be a bust. So, he had no other recourse but to let Jacob continue his journey to Canaan. This meant saying goodbye to his two daughters and his 11 grandsons. And he was not happy about it. In fact, he let Jacob know that the whole affair was nothing less than a form of highway robbery.

“These women are my daughters, these children are my grandchildren, and these flocks are my flocks—in fact, everything you see is mine. But what can I do now about my daughters and their children? So come, let’s make a covenant, you and I, and it will be a witness to our commitment.” – Genesis 41:43-44 NLT

He offered no confession or admission of wrongdoing. Instead, he accused Jacob of having taken what rightfully belonged to him, including his daughters, grandsons, and flocks. But sensing that he was powerless to stop Jacob’s departure, Laban decided to bury the hatchet and offered to sign a non-aggression pact with his son-in-law. Jacob was leaving Haran a very wealthy man and Laban was reluctant to completely sever ties with him, because he stood to lose a lot more than access to his daughters and grandsons. He really did believe that Jacob was absconding with his possessions and still held out hope that he might one day get them back.

But Jacob, anxious to put as much territory between he and Laban as physically possible, agreed to the treaty.

So Jacob took a stone and set it up as a monument. Then he told his family members, “Gather some stones.” So they gathered stones and piled them in a heap. Then Jacob and Laban sat down beside the pile of stones to eat a covenant meal. – Genesis 31:45-46 NLT

They erected a monument to commemorate their agreement, then sealed the deal with a meal. But despite their mutual pledge, the two men couldn’t agree on a name for the location. Laban called it יְגַר שָׂהֲדוּתָא (yᵊḡar śāhăḏûṯā’), which means “witness heap.” B ut Jacob named it גַּלְעֵד (galʿēḏ), which means “heap of testimony.”

The terms of the covenant were simple. They basically agreed to let the stones to serve as a boundary marker, which they pledged never to pass in order to harm on another.

“I will never pass this pile of stones to harm you, and you must never pass these stones or this monument to harm me. I call on the God of our ancestors—the God of your grandfather Abraham and the God of my grandfather Nahor—to serve as a judge between us.” – Genesis 31:52-53 NLT

It was less a treaty than it was an agreement to refrain from doing harm to one another. There were no wounds healed or friendships made as a result of this act. Laban and Jacob remained distrustful of one another and were much more like enemies than co-signers of a peace agreement. Because of their mutual interest in Leah, Rachel, and the children, the two men agreed to set their animosities aside and do what was necessary to protect those whom they loved.

And it’s interesting to note that the idol-worshiping Laban was the one who chose to call upon the name of Jacob’s God as witness.

“May the Lord keep watch between us to make sure that we keep this covenant when we are out of each other’s sight. If you mistreat my daughters or if you marry other wives, God will see it even if no one else does. He is a witness to this covenant between us.” – Genesis 31:49-50 NLT

While hundreds of miles would separate the two men, Laban called upon Yahweh to act as witness to their agreement and as the divine monitor of Jacob’s behavior. If Jacob got out of line and mistreated Leah or Rachel, Laban asked God to intervene and pass judgment on him. As a father, Laban grieved over the thought that he would no longer be able to protect his daughters. And it seems unlikely that he would live long enough to see his grandsons grow up and mature. He seemed to know that this would be the last time he ever saw his daughters and grandchildren.

So Jacob took an oath before the fearsome God of his father, Isaac, to respect the boundary line. Then Jacob offered a sacrifice to God there on the mountain and invited everyone to a covenant feast. After they had eaten, they spent the night on the mountain. – Genesis 31:53-54 NLT

Jacob would never return to Haran. And his relationship with his father-in-law would not end on the best of terms. They completed their covenant agreement, then parted ways. Laban returned to Mesopotamia and Jacob continued his journey back to Canaan. And Jacob must have felt a great sense of relief as he watched his father-in-law ride off into the distance. The last 20 years of his life had been a living nightmare, but now it was all over. But Jacob’s relief would be short-lived. He had gotten rid of one enemy but had another waiting for him at home – his brother Esau.

In the two decades he had been in Haran, Jacob had never received word from Rebekah that it was safe to come home (Genesis 27:45). So, he had no idea what to expect. Was Esau still harboring bitterness for him or had his anger subsided? Would he be greeted with a confrontation or a warm welcome? Every mile he traveled must have been excruciating as the distance between he and Esau diminished. His time of reckoning was drawing near. But, as always, God had plans of which Jacob was oblivious. This trip was going to end far better than Jacob could have ever imagined and it would all be in keeping with the promise had made 20 years earlier.

“Behold, I am with you and will keep you wherever you go, and will bring you back to this land. For I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you.” – Genesis 28:15 NLT

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

New English Translation (NET)NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2017 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.

In Need of An Attitude Adjustment

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1 Then Jacob went on his journey and came to the land of the people of the east. 2 As he looked, he saw a well in the field, and behold, three flocks of sheep lying beside it, for out of that well the flocks were watered. The stone on the well’s mouth was large, 3 and when all the flocks were gathered there, the shepherds would roll the stone from the mouth of the well and water the sheep, and put the stone back in its place over the mouth of the well.

4 Jacob said to them, “My brothers, where do you come from?” They said, “We are from Haran.” 5 He said to them, “Do you know Laban the son of Nahor?” They said, “We know him.” 6 He said to them, “Is it well with him?” They said, “It is well; and see, Rachel his daughter is coming with the sheep!” 7 He said, “Behold, it is still high day; it is not time for the livestock to be gathered together. Water the sheep and go, pasture them.” 8 But they said, “We cannot until all the flocks are gathered together and the stone is rolled from the mouth of the well; then we water the sheep.”

9 While he was still speaking with them, Rachel came with her father’s sheep, for she was a shepherdess. 10 Now as soon as Jacob saw Rachel the daughter of Laban his mother’s brother, and the sheep of Laban his mother’s brother, Jacob came near and rolled the stone from the well’s mouth and watered the flock of Laban his mother’s brother. 11 Then Jacob kissed Rachel and wept aloud. 12 And Jacob told Rachel that he was her father’s kinsman, and that he was Rebekah’s son, and she ran and told her father.

13 As soon as Laban heard the news about Jacob, his sister’s son, he ran to meet him and embraced him and kissed him and brought him to his house. Jacob told Laban all these things, 14 and Laban said to him, “Surely you are my bone and my flesh!” And he stayed with him a month. – Genesis 29:1-14 ESV

In his quest to find a bride, Jacob had traveled nearly 450 miles from Beersheba to Haran, his mother’s hometown in Mesopotamia. Upon his arrival, Jacob made his way to the local “watering hole” or a well, which would have been a natural gathering spot for the citizens of that region. In a sense, Jacob was following the example of Abraham’s servant who, years earlier, had made the same journey in search of Isaac’s wife. It had been at a well that the servant had discovered Rebekah, who would later become Abraham’s wife and Jacob’s mother (Genesis 24). And it seems likely that Jacob had heard this story many times over his lifetime. So, in an attempt to locate his mother’s kin, Jacob began his search at a local well. And he would not be disappointed.

But before proceeding to the rest of the story, it is important to compare the Genesis 24 and Genesis 29 stories. In both cases, there is a man in search of a woman who might serve as a bride for one of Abraham’s descendants. In the case of Abraham, he had commanded his servant, “go to my country and to my kindred, and take a wife for my son Isaac” (Genesis 24:4 ESV). Abraham was sending his servant to Haran to seek a suitable wife from among the household of his brother, Nahor. It was important to Abraham that his future daughter-in-law be a member of his own clan and so he warned his servant, “you will not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites” (Genesis 24:3 ESV). Notice that Isaac gave his son similar warnings and instructions.

“You must not take a wife from the Canaanite women. Arise, go to Paddan-aram to the house of Bethuel your mother’s father, and take as your wife from there one of the daughters of Laban your mother’s brother.” – Genesis 28:1-2 ESV

Both men carefully followed the instructions they had been given and made the difficult journey to Haran. And while both began their search at a well, only Abraham’s servant invoked the aid of Yahweh.

“O Lord, God of my master Abraham, please grant me success today and show steadfast love to my master Abraham.” – Genesis 24:12 ESV

Recognizing the importance of his task, this faithful servant of Abraham sought divine assistance from his master’s God. Yet, the first words out of Jacob’s mouth were to shepherds, not Yahweh. It might be argued that Jacob had prayed his prayer all the way back in Bethel.

“If God will indeed be with me and protect me on this journey, and if he will provide me with food and clothing, and if I return safely to my father’s home, then the Lord will certainly be my God.” – Genesis 28:20-21 NLT

It could be that Jacob was operating under the assumption that he already had God’s assurance of success. After all, Jacob had received a hard-and-fast commitment from the Almighty.

“I am with you, and I will protect you wherever you go. One day I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have finished giving you everything I have promised you.” – Genesis 28:15 NLT

And as the story unfolds, it becomes clear that God was guiding and directing Jacob’s steps. Yet, one can’t help but notice the glaring absence of any vertical communication on Jacob’s part. And this will become a pattern in Jacob’s life. This self-willed and sometimes conniving individual will show a marked propensity for self-reliance. In fact, it will be more than 14 years before any communication takes place between Jacob and the God of his grandfather Abraham, and it will be Yahweh who instigates the conversation.

“Return to the land of your fathers and to your kindred, and I will be with you.” – Genesis 31:3 ESV

But as Jacob stood at the well, he seemed to harbor no thoughts of God and expressed no need of His assistance. Instead, he struck up a conversation with some local shepherds, asking if they were familiar with Laban, his mother’s brother. Much to Jacob’s surprise, the shepherds not only confessed their knowledge of Laban but also announced that his daughter Rachel was on her way to the well with a flock of sheep.

Once again, a quick comparison to the Genesis 24 account is necessary. When Abraham’s servant met Rebekah for the first time, he eagerly waited to see if she was the one for whom he had prayed.

“Silently the man watched her with interest to determine if the Lord had made his journey successful or not.” – Genesis 24:21 NLT

And when he discovered her to be the answer to his prayer, the servant “bowed his head and worshiped the Lord” (Genesis 24:26 NLT). He gave all the credit to God.

“Praised be the Lord, the God of my master Abraham, who has not abandoned his faithful love for my master! The Lord has led me to the house of my master’s relatives!” – Genesis 24:27 NLT

Yet, Jacob, the grandson of Abraham, seemed to be oblivious to God’s presence and provision. The fact seems to have escaped him that his long journey had ended at a well where there just happened to be men who knew his wife’s brother. And he shows no recognition of God’s involvement even at the serendipitous appearance of Laban’s young, unmarried daughter. No prayers of thanksgiving are expressed. No praise to God flows from his lips.

In fact, the entire narrative seems to focus on Jacob’s self-reliant and fiercely independent nature, a recurring theme in his young life. Jacob had repeatedly proven his penchant for obsessive-compulsive behavior. When he saw something he wanted, he showed a powerful and unrelenting determination to do whatever it took to get it. And this occasion was no different.

As soon as Jacob learned that Rachel was Laban’s daughter, he determined to get rid of the other shepherds. He hurriedly ordered them to water their sheep and be on their way but the men insisted that were forbidden from doing so.

“We can’t water the animals until all the flocks have arrived,” they replied. “Then the shepherds move the stone from the mouth of the well, and we water all the sheep and goats.” – Genesis 29:8 NLT

Jacob was a guest in their land and unfamiliar with their local customs and laws. Yet, he had no qualms ordering these men around. And when had refused to remove the stone covering the mouth of the well, he had arrogantly taken matters into his own hands.

Jacob went over to the well and moved the stone from its mouth and watered his uncle’s flock. – Genesis 29:10 NLT

Having discovered that Rachel was his cousin, Jacob displays a self-righteous determination to seal the deal. He wants this woman to be his wife and is prepared to do whatever it takes to make it happen, even if it means disobeying local customs and violating social protocols. Overcome with joy at discovering Rachel was his cousin, Jacob kissed her. There is nothing in the text that suggests this act had sexual connotations, but it would have broken with established social etiquette. The shepherds who stood by watching this scene unfold would have had no idea who Jacob was. He was a stranger in their land. So, when they saw him kiss the young virgin daughter of one of their neighbors, they were likely appalled. This would have been unexpected and unacceptable behavior. But Jacob seems to have lived his life according to his own set of moral standards. He was a non-conformist and a rule-breaker.

As far as Jacob was concerned, he had met his future bride. But little did he know that he was also about to meet the man who would give him a run for his money when it came to deception and manipulation. In Laban, Jacob would meet his match. He would soon discover that his future father-in-law was more than a worthy challenger when it came to treachery and trickery. Jacob, the consummate deceiver, would soon find himself in the uncomfortable role of the deceived. The master manipulator would become the disgruntled and helpless victim.

Jacob was about to discover the truth behind the well-worn adage, “your sin will find you out” (Numbers 32:23). Yes, he was the descendant of Abraham and the heir to God’s covenant promises. But the sins he had committed against his brother would have consequences. He had received the blessing of God but that does not mean he had received absolution for his crimes. The next 20 years of his life would be marked by a strange mixture of blessing and curses, joy and sorrow. Slowly, but surely, God would lovingly whittle away the unhealthy aspects of Jacob’s life. This self-willed and self-reliant man would find himself in God’s remedial school for slow learners. And, in time, Jacob would learn the timeless truth concerning God’s loving and life-altering use of discipline.

And have you forgotten the exhortation addressed to you as sons?

“My son, do not scorn the Lord’s discipline
or give up when he corrects you.
“For the Lord disciplines the one he loves and chastises every son he accepts.”

Endure your suffering as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is there that a father does not discipline? But if you do not experience discipline, something all sons have shared in, then you are illegitimate and are not sons. – Hebrews 12:5-8 NLT

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

New English Translation (NET)NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2017 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.

The Wonderful Ways of God

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1 Now Abraham was old, well advanced in years. And the Lord had blessed Abraham in all things. 2 And Abraham said to his servant, the oldest of his household, who had charge of all that he had, “Put your hand under my thigh, 3 that I may make you swear by the Lord, the God of heaven and God of the earth, that you will not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell, 4 but will go to my country and to my kindred, and take a wife for my son Isaac.” 5 The servant said to him, “Perhaps the woman may not be willing to follow me to this land. Must I then take your son back to the land from which you came?” 6 Abraham said to him, “See to it that you do not take my son back there. 7 The Lord, the God of heaven, who took me from my father’s house and from the land of my kindred, and who spoke to me and swore to me, ‘To your offspring I will give this land,’ he will send his angel before you, and you shall take a wife for my son from there. 8 But if the woman is not willing to follow you, then you will be free from this oath of mine; only you must not take my son back there.” 9 So the servant put his hand under the thigh of Abraham his master and swore to him concerning this matter.

Then the servant took ten of his master’s camels and departed, taking all sorts of choice gifts from his master; and he arose and went to Mesopotamia to the city of Nahor. And he made the camels kneel down outside the city by the well of water at the time of evening, the time when women go out to draw water. – Genesis 24:1-11 ESV

With the death of Sarah, Abraham found himself an elderly widower attempting to raise his 37-year-old unmarried son. At least 137-years-old himself, Abraham would have recognized that he faced yet another challenge in his long and storied life. While God had given him a son through whom all the divine promises would be fulfilled, there was still a need for Isaac to find a mate. God’s promise to produce a great nation through Abraham would come to a screeching halt if Isaac failed to marry and bear the next generation of descendants.

Sarah’s death marked the end of Abraham’s role in producing that great nation. He would father no more sons. But he knew that God was far from finished when it came to fulfilling His promises, and he remembered the words God spoke concerning Isaac more than 37 years earlier.

“Sarah, your wife, will give birth to a son for you. You will name him Isaac, and I will confirm my covenant with him and his descendants as an everlasting covenant.” – Genesis 17:19 NLT

So, he prepared to pass the mantle of leadership and responsibility to Isaac. And because Abraham viewed himself as an alien and a stranger in the land of Canaan, he determined to find a bride for his son from among his own people living back in Mesopotamia. But, unlike so many other episodes from the life of Abraham, this one is not an example of Abraham operating solo and trying to make things happen on his own. He is simply playing the role of the loving father and attempting to ensure that his son finds the right kind of wife. Yet, in all his decisions concerning the matter, one can sense that Abraham recognized the sovereign will of God. After 137 years of life, he had come to trust that God would providentially operate behind the scenes and ensure that Isaac found just the woman through whom all His promises would be fulfilled.

Chapter 24 is the longest of all the chapters in the book of Genesis, and it is a love story. But it is less about the love that develops between Isaac and Rebekah than it is about the love of God for Abraham and his descendants. Moses opens the chapter by stating that “the Lord had blessed Abraham in all things” (Genesis 24:1 ESV). He had given Abraham a faithful and loving wife. He had showered him with great riches and abundant flocks and herds. For more than 60 years, God had protected and provided for Abraham as he wandered through the countryside of Canaan. And now, He would guide the steps of Abraham’s servant as he made the long journey back to Mesopotamia. This entire chapter is meant to remind Abraham’s future descendants, the people of Israel, of God’s love for them. The details contained in this story provide insights into their very existence. Had these events not taken place, just as God ordained them, there would be no nation of Israel.

But it all began with Abraham’s decision to send his servant back to his homeland of Mesopotamia. And Abraham forced his servant to swear a binding oath.

“…swear by the Lord, the God of heaven and God of the earth, that you will not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell, but will go to my country and to my kindred, and take a wife for my son Isaac.” – Genesis 24:3-4 ESV

As part of the oath, the servant was required to place his hand under Abraham’s thigh. This rather strange gesture was probably meant to signify that the oath was all about the continuation of Abraham’s line. But placing his hand near Abraham’s genitals, the servant would be making an intimate and binding commitment to the future of his master’s house.

But before taking this solemn oath, Abraham’s servant expressed his reservations. He questioned what he was to do if the woman he found refused to return with him to Canaan. This was a legitimate concern because most residents of Mesopotamia would have viewed Canaan as an unsophisticated backwater occupied by unruly and unfriendly nations. Abraham had tasked this man with a formidable task and he wanted to know what he was supposed to do when the women he approached turned him down. Was there an option involving the return of Isaac to Mesopotamia? But Abraham flatly rejected any notion of Isaac leaving Canaan.

“See to it that you do not take my son back there.” – Genesis 24:6 ESV

Abraham understood that this trip and the task of finding a bride for Isaac could take a very long time, and there was a high likelihood that he would not live long enough to attend his son’s wedding or see the birth of his first grandson. So, Abraham made sure his servant knew the terms of his assignment and the reason for its uncompromising rigidity.

“For the Lord, the God of heaven, who took me from my father’s house and my native land, solemnly promised to give this land to my descendants. He will send his angel ahead of you, and he will see to it that you find a wife there for my son. If she is unwilling to come back with you, then you are free from this oath of mine. But under no circumstances are you to take my son there.” – Genesis 24:7-8 NLT

This statement reveals Abraham’s unwavering faith in God’s promise. He recalled the day that God commanded him to leave Mesopotamia and relocate his family to Canaan. If God had done it once, He could do it again. And Abraham assured his servant that Yahweh would prepare the path before him. He even declared that God would guide the servant to just the right woman. And, if that God-ordained woman should refuse to accompany the servant to Canaan, the binding nature of the oath would be automatically rescinded.

Abraham was letting his servant know that this trip was going to have God’s hands all over it. Yes, his task appeared daunting and even dangerous. It’s likely that this servant was a foreigner, just like Sarah’s handmaiden, Hagar. Perhaps he was too was an Egyptian. And he was being asked to make a long journey through hostile territory and somehow convince a Mesopotamian father to give the hand of his daughter to a man he had never met – who just happened to live in Canaan. But Abraham was assuring his reluctant servant that God was in full control. So, the servant swore the oath and prepared to make the journey to Mesopotamia.

Moses provides no timeline for the trip. One minute, the servant is standing in the presence of Abraham somewhere near Hebron, and then he suddenly appears by a well outside of Nahor. The journey itself, while obviously long and arduous, was unimportant. It was the destination that mattered. Abraham had sent his servant to the region of Haran, the place where he had been living when God had called him. These names are significant because they reflect the family members of Abraham.

Now these are the generations of Terah. Terah fathered Abram, Nahor, and Haran; and Haran fathered Lot. Haran died in the presence of his father Terah in the land of his kindred, in Ur of the Chaldeans. And Abram and Nahor took wives. The name of Abram’s wife was Sarai, and the name of Nahor’s wife, Milcah, the daughter of Haran the father of Milcah and Iscah. – Genesis 11:27-29 ESV

This area of Mesopotamia had become the home of Abraham’s extended family. His brothers, Haran and Nahor, had settled and raised their families there. Of course, Haran had died, forcing Abraham to take on Haran’s son, Lot, as his ward. But Nahor had remained in Mesopotamia where he eventually married his late brother’s daughter, Milcah. And she would bear Nahor a son named Bethuel, who would father a daughter named Rebekah. So, all the while Abraham had been living in the land of Canaan, God had been working behind the scenes to prepare the woman who would become the future bride of the long-awaited son of the promise.

Little did Abraham’s servant know that his path had been sovereignly directed to the very well where he would meet the very woman whose very life God had ordained years earlier.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

New English Translation (NET)NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2017 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.