Family Matters

November 10, 2022 / kdmiller55 / Leave a comment

¹Do not rebuke an older man but encourage him as you would a father, younger men as brothers, ²older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, in all purity.

³Honor widows who are truly widows. ⁴But if a widow has children or grandchildren, let them first learn to show godliness to their own household and to make some return to their parents, for this is pleasing in the sight of God. ⁵She who is truly a widow, left all alone, has set her hope on God and continues in supplications and prayers night and day, ⁶but she who is self-indulgent is dead even while she lives. ⁷Command these things as well, so that they may be without reproach. ⁸But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.

⁹Let a widow be enrolled if she is not less than sixty years of age, having been the wife of one husband, ¹⁰and having a reputation for good works: if she has brought up children, has shown hospitality, has washed the feet of the saints, has cared for the afflicted, and has devoted herself to every good work. ¹¹But refuse to enroll younger widows, for when their passions draw them away from Christ, they desire to marry ¹²and so incur condemnation for having abandoned their former faith. ¹³Besides that, they learn to be idlers, going about from house to house, and not only idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying what they should not. ¹⁴So I would have younger widows marry, bear children, manage their households, and give the adversary no occasion for slander. ¹⁵For some have already strayed after Satan. ¹⁶If any believing woman has relatives who are widows, let her care for them. Let the church not be burdened, so that it may care for those who are truly widows. – 1 Timothy 5:1-16 ESV

In the closing part of chapter 4, Paul gave Timothy three essential tasks to master if he wanted to be successful as a man of God. He must teach others, train himself to live a godly life, and he must use his life to typify what it means to love and serve God. Now Paul gets even more practical, giving Timothy concrete examples of how to apply what he is learning to everyday life within the body of Christ.

While Paul encouraged Timothy to never “let anyone think less of you because you are young” (1 Timothy 4:12 NLT), he also wanted his young protégé to refrain from arrogantly flaunting his position as a shepherd of God or treating those under his care with disrespect. He was to give special attention to his relationships with older men and women in the church, honoring them as he would his own father and mother by giving them the respect they were due. And Timothy was to look on the younger members of the church as his brothers and sisters in Christ, treating the younger men with dignity and interacting with the younger women in purity.

Paul wanted Timothy to know that being a minister of the gospel wasn’t just about disseminating information and doling out discipline to the unruly and unfaithful. Everything hinged on relationships. The church was a family, a God-ordained collection of individuals from all walks of life divinely joined together and commanded to care for, love, and support one another. Personality conflicts, disagreements, and each individual’s residual sin natures would tend to cause conflict within the local body of Christ. So, Timothy needed to know how to handle the practical side of ministry; that or people and the personal problems they bring to the table.

There are always constant needs within the church. In Paul’s day, widows were a significant concern because, in that culture, they tended to be overlooked and neglected. Women were often considered second-class citizens with few rights and privileges. Marriage was their safety net. Being a wife and mother was a necessity for most women, providing a roof over their heads, a source of respect within the community, and a means of making ends meet in a culture where jobs for women were few and far between. That’s why widows were especially vulnerable. They were viewed as having little value and were neglected by the culture at large. But Paul encouraged Timothy to care for those widows who had become part of the family of God.

He was to see to it that they were cared for, knowing that these women were looking to God as their help and source of hope. The church was to be the hands and feet of Christ, ministering to these women, and ensuring that their families were caring for them properly. When there was no family to meet their needs, Timothy was to make sure that the family of God stepped in and cared for them properly.

As usual, these cases are never cut-and-dried. There are always underlying circumstances that must be considered and dealt with. It would be much easier if we could just say, “Take care of the widows in the church,” but there are always insinuating circumstances that make our decisions a bit more difficult and a shade more grey than black-and-white.

Timothy was to consider all circumstances regarding widows. He had to factor in their age, existing family relationships, and most importantly, their character. Not every woman who was a widow was to be the church’s responsibility. Careful consideration was to be taken when investigating the needs of these women. In some cases, their families were to be confronted and held accountable for having refused to step in and care for their own. Obviously, there were cases where sons and daughters had chosen to neglect the needs of their own mothers. This was unacceptable and the church was not obligated to take on the responsibility.

Younger widows were not added to the “list” of those who received regular support from the church. It was still possible for them to remarry, have their own families, and access to a reliable means of support. It would appear from Paul’s statements that he expected the older widows who received care from the church to willingly dedicate their lives and service to the body of Christ in return for financial support. They evidently vowed to not remarry, instead dedicating themselves to the service of God and the church. Younger women, if added to this list, and then presented with the opportunity to remarry, would find it hard to live out that kind of commitment.

These verses deal with a very specific issue that was a real problem in the church in Ephesus. It is more descriptive than prescriptive. In other words, Paul is not establishing a binding rule or law for the church. These 16 verses should not be interpreted as the non-negotiable biblical requirements for caring for widows in the local church. But they do provide an insightful glimpse into the kind of careful consideration that must be applied by shepherds when caring for their flock.

The bottom line is that the church is to be all about relationships. It can be messy and, at times, difficult. There are always variables and certain circumstances that make decision-making anything but easy. There are many things to consider when dealing with people and relationships. We must often apply a careful combination of biblical wisdom and common sense. We must do our homework, considering carefully and prayerfully what God would have us do, always striving to treat everyone with dignity, respect, and honor.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Don’t Let Your Mouth Make You Sin

October 21, 2022 / kdmiller55 / Leave a comment

¹Moses spoke to the heads of the tribes of the people of Israel, saying, “This is what the Lord has commanded. ²If a man vows a vow to the Lord, or swears an oath to bind himself by a pledge, he shall not break his word. He shall do according to all that proceeds out of his mouth.

³“If a woman vows a vow to the Lord and binds herself by a pledge, while within her father’s house in her youth, ⁴and her father hears of her vow and of her pledge by which she has bound herself and says nothing to her, then all her vows shall stand, and every pledge by which she has bound herself shall stand. ⁵But if her father opposes her on the day that he hears of it, no vow of hers, no pledge by which she has bound herself shall stand. And the Lord will forgive her, because her father opposed her.

⁶“If she marries a husband, while under her vows or any thoughtless utterance of her lips by which she has bound herself, ⁷and her husband hears of it and says nothing to her on the day that he hears, then her vows shall stand, and her pledges by which she has bound herself shall stand. ⁸But if, on the day that her husband comes to hear of it, he opposes her, then he makes void her vow that was on her, and the thoughtless utterance of her lips by which she bound herself. And the Lord will forgive her. ⁹(But any vow of a widow or of a divorced woman, anything by which she has bound herself, shall stand against her.) ¹⁰And if she vowed in her husband’s house or bound herself by a pledge with an oath, ¹¹and her husband heard of it and said nothing to her and did not oppose her, then all her vows shall stand, and every pledge by which she bound herself shall stand. ¹²But if her husband makes them null and void on the day that he hears them, then whatever proceeds out of her lips concerning her vows or concerning her pledge of herself shall not stand. Her husband has made them void, and the Lord will forgive her. ¹³Any vow and any binding oath to afflict herself, her husband may establish, or her husband may make void. ¹⁴But if her husband says nothing to her from day to day, then he establishes all her vows or all her pledges that are upon her. He has established them, because he said nothing to her on the day that he heard of them. ¹⁵But if he makes them null and void after he has heard of them, then he shall bear her iniquity.”

¹⁶These are the statutes that the Lord commanded Moses about a man and his wife and about a father and his daughter while she is in her youth within her father’s house. – Numbers 30:1-16 ESV

The people of Israel find themselves encamped near the border of the land of Canaan, and Moses is attempting to prepare them for the fast-approaching day when they will have to cross over that border and begin their conquest and capture of the land promised to them by God. Much of what Moses has communicated to them has been practical advice concerning matters of worship and sacrifice. When they finally enter the land, their lives will be consumed by fighting and trying to create new lives for themselves. Their old way of life will be over. They will go from being wanderers to conquerors. Rather than living in tents as nomads, they will find enjoy the comforts of home in houses and cities they didn’t build.

But with all the changes they will face, Moses stressed the need that they continue to maintain the religious rites and rituals that God had given them at Sinai. They were to keep all the commands regarding sacrifices and offerings. Just because they were entering a time marked by military conquest, they were not to abandon their relationship with and commitment to God.

Now, in chapter 30, Moses addresses a rather strange topic that is unfamiliar to the modern western mindset. Suddenly, as if out of nowhere, Moses brings up the issue of making vows. This is not a reference to wedding vows, but to the making of verbal commitments and, in most cases, commitments made to God. They are sometimes referred to as oaths.

Now, why would Moses be bringing up this topic at this particular point? It sounds a bit out of place, but it makes sense when one considers that the Israelites were preparing to enter a strange new land and would be facing a host of unknowns. As they found themselves going into battles against much larger and more skilled armies, it would be tempting to make vows to God in an effort to secure success. A vow could be a promise made to God in exchange for His blessing or guarantee of safety. It might go something like this: “God, if you will bring me back safely from this battle, I will dedicate my firstborn child to Your service.”

We see just such a conversation in the book of Judges. Jephthah, one of the judges of Israel found himself facing a battle against the Ammonites. In an attempt to garner God’s assistance in defeating his enemy, Jephthah made a vow.

And Jephthah made a vow to the Lord. He said, “If you give me victory over the Ammonites, I will give to the Lord whatever comes out of my house to meet me when I return in triumph. I will sacrifice it as a burnt offering.” – Judges 1130-31 NLT

Jephthah meant well, but his vow would come back to haunt him. The text goes on to indicate that “Jephthah led his army against the Ammonites, and the Lord gave him victory” (Judges 11:32 NLT). But then it adds this unexpected note:

When Jephthah returned home to Mizpah, his daughter came out to meet him, playing on a tambourine and dancing for joy. She was his one and only child; he had no other sons or daughters. When he saw her, he tore his clothes in anguish. “Oh, my daughter!” he cried out. “You have completely destroyed me! You’ve brought disaster on me! For I have made a vow to the Lord, and I cannot take it back.” – Judges 11:34-35 NLT

According to the book of Judges, Jephthah kept the vow that he had made. But the whole point of the story is the danger of making rash or hasty vows. God takes the swearing of oaths and the making of vows seriously.

When you make a promise to God, don’t delay in following through, for God takes no pleasure in fools. Keep all the promises you make to him. It is better to say nothing than to make a promise and not keep it. Don’t let your mouth make you sin. And don’t defend yourself by telling the Temple messenger that the promise you made was a mistake. That would make God angry, and he might wipe out everything you have achieved. – Ecclesiastes 4:4-6 NLT

“When you make a vow to the Lord your God, be prompt in fulfilling whatever you promised him. For the Lord your God demands that you promptly fulfill all your vows, or you will be guilty of sin. However, it is not a sin to refrain from making a vow. But once you have voluntarily made a vow, be careful to fulfill your promise to the Lord your God.” – Deuteronomy 23:21-23 NLT

Notice the last part of that Deuteronomy passage. “It is not a sin to refrain from making a vow.” In other words, vows should be made circumspectly and cautiously. As the Ecclesiastes passage puts it: “It is better to say nothing than to make a promise and not keep it.”

And in chapter 30 of Numbers, Moses addresses this potentially dangerous issue of oath-making because he knows the people will soon find themselves in difficult situations that will tempt them to make unwise bargains with God. So, he reminds them to do so with caution.

A man who makes a vow to the Lord or makes a pledge under oath must never break it. He must do exactly what he said he would do. – Numbers 30:2 NLT

But then, Moses adds a few important exceptions or exclusions to this rule. He addresses the vows made by women, particularly married women and single young women who are still living under their father’s authority. He begins with those who are unmarried. If one of these young ladies made a vow to God, it would be binding, unless her father overheard it and determined to disavow or dismiss it. As the head of the household, he had that right and authority.

“Vows were voluntary promises to do or not do specified things if God would or would not do something else. They also expressed thanks when God had done something special. They usually involved fasting or abstaining from other lawful things or giving God some special gift or offering. Moses explained the basic principles governing vows first (v. 2). The Israelites were to take their promises to God seriously and not brake them (cf. Eccles, 5:4-5).” – Dr. Thomas L. Constable, Notes on Numbers

If a father became aware of his daughter’s vow and deemed it as unacceptable, he could annul it, and she would be bound to her father’s wishes. And the father’s decision would release the young lady from her commitment to God.

The same thing would be true for a married woman. If she made a vow to God and her husband determined it to be unacceptable, she would be obligated to submit to his decision. His disavowal would free her from any obligation to God.

…if her husband refuses to accept her vow or impulsive pledge on the day he hears of it, he nullifies her commitments, and the Lord will forgive her. – Numbers 30:8 NLT

This all hinges on the issue of headship. A young woman, while unmarried, remained under his father’s protection and authority. As soon as she married, she came under the headship of her husband. And both the father and the husband answered to God. The test does not address whether God would hold the father or husband responsible for the breaking of the vow. There could be a case in which a father forced his daughter to break her vow but, in doing so, he violated the will of God. This authority given to the father and husband was not to be taken lightly. And Moses makes it clear that if the father or husband did not reject the woman’s vow, she remained obligated to God.

In the case of widows or divorcees, they were directly answerable to God. With no husband to watch over them, God acted as their protector and provider. So, if they made a vow to God, they would be held responsible to keep it.

If, however, a woman is a widow or is divorced, she must fulfill all her vows and pledges. – Numbers 30:9 NLT

This admonition was intended to make these women think twice before making vows to God. But it also suggests that God would be watching over them and protecting them from doing anything rash or thoughtless.

As the psalmist later attested, vows were to be taken seriously and made soberly.

Make vows to the Lord your God, and keep them.
Let everyone bring tribute to the Awesome One. – Psalm 76:11 NLT

Once the Israelites entered the land, they were to refrain from making bargains with God. Because if they attempted to buy God off by making vows they never intended to keep, they would pay dearly for it.

Wine, Women, and Words

July 17, 2022 / kdmiller55 / Leave a comment

¹The words of King Lemuel. An oracle that his mother taught him:

²What are you doing, my son? What are you doing, son of my womb?
    What are you doing, son of my vows?
³Do not give your strength to women,
    your ways to those who destroy kings.
⁴It is not for kings, O Lemuel,
    it is not for kings to drink wine,
    or for rulers to take strong drink,
⁵lest they drink and forget what has been decreed
    and pervert the rights of all the afflicted.
⁶Give strong drink to the one who is perishing,
    and wine to those in bitter distress;
⁷let them drink and forget their poverty
    and remember their misery no more.
⁸Open your mouth for the mute,
    for the rights of all who are destitute.
⁹Open your mouth, judge righteously,
    defend the rights of the poor and needy. – Proverbs 31:1-9 ESV

These proverbs are presented as the words of King Lemuel and the first nine verses come in the form of an oracle taught to him by his mother. The Hebrew word translated as “oracle” is maśśā’ and it refers to a message with a heavy burden. These are weighty or substantive teachings that were passed down from mother to son and then collected for distribution in Solomon’s book of Proverbs.

It would appear that Lemuel was a foreign king because his name appears nowhere in the chronicles of the kings of Israel of Judah. He could have been a proselyte to Judaism and, therefore, a worshiper of Yahweh. His mother, the former queen, could have been a descendant of Abraham or a convert to Judaism who passed down her faith to her young son. If the remainder of the chapter is biographical in nature and refers to Lemuel’s mother, it would be safe to say that she was a godly woman and had a tremendous influence on her son.

Verses 2-9 are the loving words of a mother to her son but they are rather unique in that they address the dangers facing a king. These words of warning come from someone who seems to have had firsthand experience in the matters she raises. As the former queen, it is likely that she had seen her husband, Lemuel’s father, struggle with these matters.

Her words are rather succinct and deal with three main topics: Women, wine, and words. She presents the first two as potential hazards to be avoided. It is not that either is particularly evil but that, for a king, they can prove to be dangerous and even deadly. Perhaps her husband had been a philanderer who allowed his love for women to destroy his marriage and weaken his kingdom.

Over the centuries, there has been repeated speculation that Lemuel was a pen name for Solomon. That would make the mother referred to in this chapter none other than Bathsheba. She would have had ample knowledge of the seductive influence that a woman can have on a man. And she knew what it was like to be the target of a man’s fatal attraction. After all, as a married woman, she had been seduced by King David and committed adultery with him. In an attempt to cover up the son their sin produced, David had Bathsheba’s husband murdered. He then took Bathsheba to be his wife and she bore him a son, the fruit of their adulterous affair. But that son died in infancy, a punishment from God for David’s transgression. Then God blessed Bathsheba with another son, Solomon.

And when Solomon grew up and ascended to the throne of his father, it would make sense that Bathsheba would express concern about his apparent weakness for women.

“What are you doing, my son? What are you doing, son of my womb?
What are you doing, son of my vows?
Do not give your strength to women,
your ways to those who destroy kings.” – Proverbs 31:2-3 ESV

The book of 1 Kings paints a rather lurid picture of Solomon’s attraction to the opposite sex.

Now King Solomon loved many foreign women. Besides Pharaoh’s daughter, he married women from Moab, Ammon, Edom, Sidon, and from among the Hittites. The LORD had clearly instructed the people of Israel, “You must not marry them, because they will turn your hearts to their gods.” Yet Solomon insisted on loving them anyway. He had 700 wives of royal birth and 300 concubines. And in fact, they did turn his heart away from the LORD.

In Solomon’s old age, they turned his heart to worship other gods instead of being completely faithful to the LORD his God, as his father, David, had been. – 1 Kings 11:1-4 NLT

Whether Lemuel was Solomon’s pseudonym and the loving mother in this passage was Bathsheba is all nothing more than speculation. But the biography of Solomon provides ample evidence that the maternal counsel found in this passage is more than merited.

But she didn’t stop there. She also warned her son about the dangers of wine.

It is not for kings, O Lemuel, to guzzle wine.
Rulers should not crave alcohol. – Proverbs 31:4 NLT

This loving mother seems to have firsthand experience with the dangers of alcohol. Perhaps she had watched Lemuel’s father struggle with controlling his consumption of wine and had seen how it had negatively impacted his ability to rule wisely. So, she pleads with her son to practice moderation and self-control. Notice her words. She does not forbid the use of alcohol but warns against its abuse. Lemuel is not to “guzzle” wine. He is not to “crave alcohol.” In other words, Lemuel is to avoid addictive behavior.

While the Scriptures do not completely prohibit the use of alcohol, there are plenty of verses that warn against it. And while there are some religious groups that abuse and misinterpret these verses, there are just as many that ignore them altogether.

In our desire to justify our use of alcohol, we tend to portray the Scriptures as seemingly silent on the topic. But repeatedly in the Book of Proverbs, we have seen Solomon warn his sons about the inherent dangers of alcohol consumption. In Proverbs 31, King Lemuel is warned against drinking to excess. This passage isn’t prohibiting the use of alcohol. In fact, in those days, to deny the use of alcohol in the court of a king would have been unheard of. It would have been absurd.

But excessive use of alcohol should be avoided at all times, especially by those who hold positions of responsibility and authority over the lives of others. The problem is that alcohol distorts the senses, muddies the mind, and can lead to poor decision-making. Whether you’re a king, national leader, company president, or a parent, the last thing you should want is to have your mind clouded by alcohol, rendering your judgment impaired and your ability to perform your responsibilities diminished.

There are far too many stories concerning wives whose husbands have struggled with a drinking problem. In many cases, these men were hard workers and loving husbands and fathers, who allowed alcohol to destroy their ability to lead and protect as they should. As Lemuel is warned, when they drink, they tend to make unwise decisions. They lose the capacity to think and rule wisely. Under the influence of alcohol, “they may forget the law and not give justice to the oppressed” (Proverbs 31:5 NLT).

They lose their moral bearings, their sense of right and wrong, and their understanding of justice. In the end, they make poor decisions that put their families at risk – financially, emotionally, and even physically. Alcohol in all its forms can be deadening and even deadly. Solomon warns us, “Wine produces mockers; alcohol leads to brawls. Those led astray by drink cannot be wise” (Proverbs 20:1 NLT). Here are a few of the other admonitions about wine and alcohol in the Book of Proverbs:

Those who love pleasure become poor;
those who love wine and luxury will never be rich. – Proverbs 21:17 NLT

Wine produces mockers; alcohol leads to brawls.
Those led astray by drink cannot be wise. – Proverbs 20:1 NLT

Don’t gaze at the wine, seeing how red it is,
    how it sparkles in the cup, how smoothly it goes down.
For in the end it bites like a poisonous snake;
    it stings like a viper.
You will see hallucinations,
    and you will say crazy things.
You will stagger like a sailor tossed at sea,
    clinging to a swaying mast. – Proverbs 23:30-34 NLT

In Proverbs, wine and mixed drinks are closely associated with the wicked and the immoral woman. It is almost always used in the sense of excess and over-indulgence. It appeals to the sensual side of man. It can dull our senses and feed the sinful side of our sensual nature.

There is a need for wisdom when it comes to the use of alcohol. We must be fully aware of its dangers. We must acknowledge its ability to impact and impair our judgment. It is a mind-altering, mood-enhancing substance that, if used wisely and appropriately, can have positive benefits. But it can also be misused and abused. It can destroy and divide. It can be used to escape reality and avoid responsibility. It can bring pleasure but it can also produce immoral behavior.

The final word of motherly advice has to do with words. Lemuel’s mother warns him to watch his tongue. Just as women and wine can have a negative influence, so can words. As a king, Lemuel wielded tremendous power. With a word, he could condemn or commend. He could use his authority for good or evil. So, she calls on her son to use his sovereign power to protect the less fortunate within his kingdom.

Open your mouth for the mute,
for the rights of all who are destitute.
Open your mouth, judge righteously,
defend the rights of the poor and needy. – Proverbs 31:8-9 NLT

A wise king understands that he serves God and acts as a steward of His divine authority. God defends the downtrodden and disadvantaged and He expects His vice-regent to do the same. Lemuel’s mother wanted her son to use the power inherent in his words for the good of all. She longed for him to judge righteously and to rule wisely.

Women, wine, and words. These three simple topics have the capacity to make or break any man, especially a king. And Lemuel’s mother loved him enough to warn him to tread carefully with all three.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

The Wisdom of Experience

May 31, 2022 / kdmiller55 / Leave a comment

¹My son, be attentive to my wisdom;
    incline your ear to my understanding,
²that you may keep discretion,
    and your lips may guard knowledge.
³For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey,
    and her speech is smoother than oil,
⁴but in the end she is bitter as wormwood,
    sharp as a two-edged sword.
⁵Her feet go down to death;
    her steps follow the path to Sheol;
⁶she does not ponder the path of life;
    her ways wander, and she does not know it.

⁷And now, O sons, listen to me,
    and do not depart from the words of my mouth.
⁸Keep your way far from her,
    and do not go near the door of her house,
⁹lest you give your honor to others
    and your years to the merciless,
¹⁰lest strangers take their fill of your strength,
    and your labors go to the house of a foreigner,
¹¹and at the end of your life you groan,
    when your flesh and body are consumed,
¹²and you say, “How I hated discipline,
    and my heart despised reproof!
¹³I did not listen to the voice of my teachers
    or incline my ear to my instructors.
¹⁴I am at the brink of utter ruin
    in the assembled congregation.”

¹⁵Drink water from your own cistern,
    flowing water from your own well.
¹⁶Should your springs be scattered abroad,
    streams of water in the streets?
¹⁷Let them be for yourself alone,
    and not for strangers with you.
¹⁸Let your fountain be blessed,
    and rejoice in the wife of your youth,
¹⁹    a lovely deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight;
    be intoxicated always in her love.
²⁰Why should you be intoxicated, my son, with a forbidden woman
    and embrace the bosom of an adulteress?
²¹For a man’s ways are before the eyes of the Lord,
    and he ponders all his paths.
²²The iniquities of the wicked ensnare him,
    and he is held fast in the cords of his sin.
²³He dies for lack of discipline,
    and because of his great folly he is led astray. – Proverbs 5:1-23 ESV

This sounds like strange, if not hypocritical, advice coming from a man who had 700 wives and 300 concubines (1 Kings 11:3). It would appear that wise sayings weren’t the only things that Solomon made a habit of collecting. This king with the overactive libido had an eye for the ladies. So, it seems a bit disingenuous for Solomon to be giving his sons a lecture on avoiding the “forbidden woman.” How could he presume that he was the right man to give counsel not to “drink water from your own cistern” (Proverbs 5:15 ESV).

Yet, Solomon was the perfect person to be passing on his life experiences to his as-yet-unmarried sons. He wasn’t simply spouting pious-sounding platitudes he had discovered along the way, but he was sharing the painful life lessons he had been forced to learn as a result of his own pride and stupidity. Verses 12-13 are actually Solomon’s personal testimony.

“How I hated discipline,
and my heart despised reproof!
I did not listen to the voice of my teachers
or incline my ear to my instructors.”

Solomon is offering up a painful confession. And yet, Solomon’s admission would not have been news to his boys. In fact, it is likely that, while they all shared Solomon as their father, they each had a different mother. They suffered from no delusions that their father was a one-woman man. Each knew that their dad had been less-than-faithful to their own mother. And the older they became and the more knowledge they gained about the Word of God, they would have known that their father’s actions were out of step with the will of God.

In Solomon’s old age, they turned his heart to worship other gods instead of being completely faithful to the LORD his God, as his father, David, had been. – 1 Kings 11:1-4 ESV

Somewhere along the way, Solomon had made the decision to violate the command of God. His personal preferences and passions took precedence over God’s will. He would have been very familiar with God’s command concerning the kings of Israel.

The king must not take many wives for himself, because they will turn his heart away from the LORD. – Deuteronomy 17:17 NLT

But Solomon had decided that he knew best and he began to fill his home and his harem with beautiful women, collecting them like treasures to showcase his power and prestige.

But over in Proverbs 14:12 we read, “There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death.” That phrase “in the end” seems to pop up on a regular basis in the Proverbs. It refers to a day of accountability, not necessarily the day of the judgment of the Lord, but of a day of consequence. Every action has an outcome. Every path we take in life has a destination or an end. If a young man or woman chooses a life of immorality, it will have an outcome, and probably not the one they were expecting. Sin never does.

Solomon is speaking from experience when he states, “the lips of an immoral woman are as sweet as honey, and her mouth is smoother than oil – in the end she is as bitter as poison” (Proverbs 14:3-4 NLT). He knew what he was talking about and he wanted his sons to know that what appears to be tempting and tantalizing doesn’t always turn out quite as advertised.

One of the characteristics of foolishness or a lack of godly wisdom is the inability to foresee consequences. We are either oblivious to them or simple choose to ignore them. But more than likely, it is just a case of ignorance. A child touches a hot stove because they don’t know any better. They are ignorant of the consequences. But there comes a time in all of our lives when we become aware of the consequences of sin and still stubbornly continue to commit them. We think those consequences won’t apply to us. We refuse to consider “the end.” We choose to live in the pleasure of the moment, putting off any thought of the consequences, or simply refusing to believe there will be any negative ramifications for our actions. But to think that way is not only foolish, it’s deadly. We can end up losing everything – our honor, all we’ve achieved in life, the fruit of all our labor, the blessings of God, and the love and respect of those we once held dear. Like Solomon, we will find ourselves sadly looking back at our actions and saying, “How I hated discipline! If only I had not ignored all the warnings! Oh, why didn’t I listen to my teachers? Why didn’t I pay attention to my instructors? I have come to the brink of utter ruin, and now I must face public disgrace” (Proverbs 5:12-14 NLT).

In the end, you will have regrets because the path you chose had consequences. But nobody thinks about the potential consequences when facing the alluring temptation of sin – except the godly. But obviously, Solomon is an example of the godly man who took his eyes off the Lord and began to seek satisfaction and significance somewhere else. It began with the allure of the forbidden fruit of many wives, but it wasn’t long before that sin produced an even greater one: the worship of their false gods. Solomon’s lust for women turned into a loss of love for God.

Sin is so tempting, and it’s allure is real, making it a constant problem for men and women alike. And while Solomon wrote his proverbs a long time ago, some things never change. We still need to hear his words of wisdom and warning. He spends an entire Proverb warning his sons against the dangers of the immoral woman or prostitute. It was a problem then and it remains a problem today. Promiscuity is alive and well, and it may be even more acceptable today than ever before. The increase in casual sex and a growing comfortableness and complacency with sex outside the confines of marriage make this message particularly timely for our sex-saturated society. Solomon’s warning to his sons was necessary in his day and it is needed in ours as well. But it sounds so antiquated and puritanical! At least that’s what many in our society would say. But it is a warning against the lies of all temptations. Satan is the father of lies and the great deceiver. He loves to package his product in such a way that it hides the dangers within. He is the master of manipulation and deception, creating the allusion of pleasure, but all the while hiding the true consequences. The prostitute is a perfect illustration of his methodologies. She is attractive, flattering, enticing, and appeals to man’s basic instincts. She knows man’s weakness and aims right for it. The apostle John warned us, “For the world offers only a craving for physical pleasure, a craving for everything we see, and pride in our achievements and possessions” (1 John 2:16 NLT).

That is Satan’s strategy. Everything he offers is designed to appeal to what we crave and desire, to fulfill our insatiable need for pleasure, and to satisfy our hunger for significance. A prostitute goes out of her way to make her “client” feel wanted, important, and significant. She offers to provide him with physical and emotional pleasure and to satisfy all his needs. But in the end, “her feet go down to death.” Like all sin, the consequences are dangerous and deadly. It never delivers as promised. It is the ultimate in false advertising, yet we fall prey to it each and every day in so many ways. We take the bait and suffer the consequences of broken marriages, unfulfilled expectations, destroyed reputations, and shattered lives.

So what’s the solution? Wisdom, wise counsel, and discernment. Solomon warns his sons in graphic detail of the dangers facing them. He doesn’t sugarcoat or ignore it. He paints a vivid and compelling picture of the dangers of sin. He talks openly about the consequences. He wanted them to know the truth and he was willing for his sons to learn from his own mistakes.

Our congregations need to hear the truth. The enemy is filling their minds with lies day after day, and he has more resources available than ever before. The media provides him with a constant venue for propagating his lies and distributing his message of falsehood. We need to speak truth. We need to share the wisdom of God’s Word. We need to promote the non-negotiable requirement of living according to God’s way – unapologetically and boldly. The dangers are real. The consequences are devastating. Wisdom, wise counsel, and discernment are needed more than ever before.

Women of God

November 8, 2021 / kdmiller55 / 1 Comment

¹Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, ²when they see your respectful and pure conduct. ³Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— ⁴but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. ⁵For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, ⁶as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. – 1 Peter 3:1-6 ESV

Peter is attempting to encourage and motivate members of local congregations throughout Pontus, Galatia, Cappadocia, Asia, and Bithynia, who are facing ongoing persecution for their faith. This is an encyclical letter, intended to be copied and circulated among the churches, each of which was located in Asia Minor. While it’s likely that these congregations consisted primarily of born-again Gentiles, the presence of converted Jews would not have been surprising. At this point in history, Asia Minor had become a popular destination for Jewish immigrants who had chosen to leave Israel and settle in other lands. The 1st-Century Jewish historian Josephus wrote, “there is no city, no tribe, whether Greek or barbarian, in which Jewish law and Jewish customs have not taken root.” At the time Peter wrote his letter, Asia Minor contained one of the largest concentrations of Jews in the world. So, it is likely that these congregations were made up of Greeks and Jews, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarians, Scythians, slaves, and freemen (Colossians 3:11). And, according to Peter, they all shared one thing in common.

He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed. For you were straying like sheep, but have now returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls. – 1 Peter 2:24-25 ESV

Regardless of their ethnic or cultural identities, these people were all one in Christ. And Peter expected each of them to “Live as people who are free, not using your freedom as a cover-up for evil, but living as servants of God” (1 Peter 2:16 ESV). He wanted them to understand that God had redeemed them out of their former state of slavery to sin. God had purchased their freedom by offering His own Son as the payment. Peter was trying to convey the same message that Paul wrote to the church in Corinth.

Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body. – 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 NLT

Peter had opened his letter with a similar reminder of their new status as God’s purchased possession. God the Father had paid the ultimate price for their freedom.

For you know that God paid a ransom to save you from the empty life you inherited from your ancestors. And it was not paid with mere gold or silver, which lose their value. It was the precious blood of Christ, the sinless, spotless Lamb of God. – 1 Peter 1:18-19 NLT

As a result, they were expected to conduct their lives in a manner that would honor God among their unbelieving friends and neighbors. God had not brought about a change in their circumstances, but He had reconciled them from their former state of alienation to Him. Rather than living as enemies of God, they found themselves to be His children. They were still living in the same home and remained married to the same person. Their jobs had not changed. If they were poor when they came to faith in Christ, they had not experienced a sudden change in their financial circumstances. If they had come to faith while a slave, their condition remained unchanged. But, at the same time, Peter wanted them to know that everything about them had changed. They were new creations. They were now sons and daughters of God. They were indwelt by the Holy Spirit of God and possessed all the power they needed for living godly lives (2 Peter 1:3).

But Peter knew that his admonitions were going to have to be specific in nature. What was this new life in Christ supposed to look like? If they were somehow free but remained servants of God, how would that make a difference in their daily lives? And as if to answer these very questions, Peter began broad and then narrowed his focus to a few specific circumstances. Addressing every single believer in his audience, Peter wrote, “Be subject for the Lord’s sake to every human institution…” (1 Peter 2:13 ESV). Due to their residence in Asia Minor, they all remained citizens of the Roman government. God had not miraculously transported them out from under the despotic rule of Nero. And they needed to understand that their newfound freedom in Christ did not absolve them from submission to the governmental authorities. Even Jesus had taught His disciples, “give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar, and give to God what belongs to God” (Mark 12:17 NLT).

Peter wanted them to understand that their submission to the governing authorities was “for the Lord’s sake.” Their willingness to submit was to be based on an understanding that these authorities were instruments of God. The apostle Paul articulated this concept of divine authorization in his letter to the Romans.

Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God. So anyone who rebels against authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and they will be punished. For the authorities do not strike fear in people who are doing right, but in those who are doing wrong. Would you like to live without fear of the authorities? Do what is right, and they will honor you. The authorities are God’s servants, sent for your good. – Romans 13:1-14 NLT

Peter then applied this concept of submission to slaves, stating, “Servants, be subject to your masters with all respect, not only to the good and gentle but also to the unjust” (1 Peter 2:18 ESV). God had not redeemed them from their slavery to men, but He had set them free from their enslavement to sin. That meant that they could respond to their earthly circumstance in ways that were consistent with their new identity as God’s children. Rather than resentment and anger, they could display love, honor, and respect, even to their unjust masters. Through the Spirit’s indwelling power, they could live as salt and light, even as slaves of men. They could display the mind of Christ and mirror the heart of the apostle Paul.

I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. – Philippians 4:11-13 NLT

Next, Peter focuses his attention on the married women in his audience, telling them, “wives, be subject to your own husbands” (1 Peter 3:1 ESV). Notice the transition in Peter’s thinking. He has moved from encouraging everyone to be subject to the ruling authorities to slaves willingly submitting to their masters. Now, he takes this topic of submission into the home. Peter was well aware that some of these women had come to faith in Jesus, while their husbands remained unsaved and unsympathetic to their conversion to Christianity. And, sadly, even in the Gentile community of that day, women had few rights and were often treated as second-class citizens. For some of these women, there would be a strong temptation and inclination to use their newfound faith as an excuse to leave their husbands. Yet, Peter had already warned them, “you are free, yet you are God’s slaves, so don’t use your freedom as an excuse to do evil” (1 Peter 2:16 NLT). And it was Paul who warned the believers in Corinth about misusing their newfound freedom in Christ.

Each of you should continue to live in whatever situation the Lord has placed you, and remain as you were when God first called you. This is my rule for all the churches. For instance, a man who was circumcised before he became a believer should not try to reverse it. And the man who was uncircumcised when he became a believer should not be circumcised now. For it makes no difference whether or not a man has been circumcised. The important thing is to keep God’s commandments.

Yes, each of you should remain as you were when God called you. Are you a slave? Don’t let that worry you—but if you get a chance to be free, take it. And remember, if you were a slave when the Lord called you, you are now free in the Lord. And if you were free when the Lord called you, you are now a slave of Christ. God paid a high price for you, so don’t be enslaved by the world. Each of you, dear brothers and sisters, should remain as you were when God first called you. – 1 Corinthians 7:17-24 NLT

Like Paul, Peter’s focus was on godly conduct. The salvation provided by God through Christ was not intended to remedy all earthly injustices or correct all unpleasant conditions. It was meant to transform human lives from the inside out and equip them with divine power to conduct their lives in a manner worthy of the Lord (Colossians 1:10). This is why Peter encourages believing wives to live in the power of the Spirit so that their unbelieving husbands might “be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives” (1 Peter 3:1-2 NLT).

And Peter reminds them that the source of their strength and influence was internal and not external. Contrary to the trends and fads of their contemporary culture, these Christian women were to understand that true beauty was not a result of outer adornment but “from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God” (1 Peter 3:4 NLT). These women were living in a culture was that male-dominated and where they enjoyed few, in any, rights. In a real way, many of them were treated as no better than slaves, experiencing conditions in which they were considered as little more than property.

Peter is not encouraging or advocating the oppression of women. He is not suggesting that these women meekly subject themselves to verbal and physical abuse. He is promoting godly behavior even in the midst of what appears to be ungodly conditions. Sadly, over the centuries, this passage has been used within the church to promote the subjugation of women. But that was not Peter’s intent. He was dealing with a cultural reality in which women were truly second-class citizens, and he was attempting to encourage these women to use the power in their possession to bring about radical and redemptive change in their homes. While the world deprived them of value and influence, the Spirit had transformed them into powerful agents of change.

Peter wanted them to understand that they were God’s daughters and that their Heavenly Father cared for them deeply, and He would watch over them and protect them. That is why Peter called them to “do good and do not fear anything that is frightening” (1 Peter 3:6 ESV). He was not minimizing the nature of their circumstance but was emphasizing the sovereign power of their God.

Hearing Is Not Believing

July 27, 2021July 28, 2021 / kdmiller55 / Leave a comment

¹Soon afterward he went on through cities and villages, proclaiming and bringing the good news of the kingdom of God. And the twelve were with him, ²and also some women who had been healed of evil spirits and infirmities: Mary, called Magdalene, from whom seven demons had gone out, ³and Joanna, the wife of Chuza, Herod’s household manager, and Susanna, and many others, who provided for them out of their means.

⁴And when a great crowd was gathering and people from town after town came to him, he said in a parable, ⁵“A sower went out to sow his seed. And as he sowed, some fell along the path and was trampled underfoot, and the birds of the air devoured it. ⁶And some fell on the rock, and as it grew up, it withered away, because it had no moisture. ⁷And some fell among thorns, and the thorns grew up with it and choked it. ⁸And some fell into good soil and grew and yielded a hundredfold.” As he said these things, he called out, “He who has ears to hear, let him hear.”

⁹And when his disciples asked him what this parable meant, ¹⁰he said, “To you it has been given to know the secrets of the kingdom of God, but for others they are in parables, so that ‘seeing they may not see, and hearing they may not understand.’ ¹¹Now the parable is this: The seed is the word of God. ¹²The ones along the path are those who have heard; then the devil comes and takes away the word from their hearts, so that they may not believe and be saved. ¹³And the ones on the rock are those who, when they hear the word, receive it with joy. But these have no root; they believe for a while, and in time of testing fall away. ¹⁴And as for what fell among the thorns, they are those who hear, but as they go on their way they are choked by the cares and riches and pleasures of life, and their fruit does not mature. ¹⁵As for that in the good soil, they are those who, hearing the word, hold it fast in an honest and good heart, and bear fruit with patience.” – Luke 8:1-15 ESV

Luke records that Jesus continued His Galilean ministry, visiting many of the towns and villages of the region, where He continued to proclaim the good news that the kingdom of God was close at hand. The Messiah had come and the King’s arrival was a visual sign that the kingdom would not be far behind. A new day had dawned in Israel. Things would never be the same again, but what Jesus came to bring would be far different than what the people of Israel had expected. Yes, He was the King for whom they had longed for, but He was offering them a kingdom far different than they had imagined. As Jesus would later tell the Roman governor, Pilate, at his trial: ““My Kingdom is not an earthly kingdom. If it were, my followers would fight to keep me from being handed over to the Jewish leaders. But my Kingdom is not of this world” (John 18:36 NLT).

And later on in his gospel, Luke records an exchange between Jesus and the Pharisees. They asked Him, “When will the Kingdom of God come?” (Luke 17:20 NLT), and Jesus responded, “the Kingdom of God is already among you” (Luke 17:21 NLT).

With His incarnation, Jesus came to earth as the fulfillment of the promise that God made to David. He was the Son who would re-establish the Davidic dynasty and rule over an everlasting kingdom from the city of Jerusalem.

“I will raise up your offspring after you, who shall come from your body, and I will establish his kingdom. He shall build a house for my name, and I will establish the throne of his kingdom forever.… And your house and your kingdom shall be made sure forever before me.” – 2 Samuel 7:12-13, 16 ESV

As Jesus made His way through the cities of Galilee, He was accompanied by His 12 disciples. These men had ring-side seats to the greatest show on earth. They were privileged to watch the Messiah as He validated His ministry and mission through miracles and signs. They were able to hear Him teach but also enjoyed up-close and personal access to the Son of God. And Luke adds that there were others who made up this inner circle of Jesus’ followers. He provides the names of a number of women who had decided to join the retinue of Jesus’ disciples because they “had been healed of evil spirits and infirmities” (Luke 8:2 ESV).

Luke provides us with the names of three of the women who were part of the growing number of Jesus’ female followers. There was Mary Magdalene, Joanna, and Susanna. Each of these women had been delivered from disease or demons by the hand of Jesus. Their lives had been radically transformed by their encounter with this Rabbi from Nazareth and they decided to follow Him wherever He went, believing Him to be who He claimed to be: The Messiah of Israel.

And we know that these women were not fairweather friends. They remained committed to Jesus throughout His earthly ministry and Luke reports that they were even present at Golgotha when Jesus was crucified.

And all those who knew Jesus stood at a distance, and the women who had followed him from Galilee saw these things. – Luke 23:39 NLT

That these women dedicated their lives to following Jesus is especially telling when one considers the status of women in the culture of that day. It would have been unthinkable within Hebrew culture for a woman to abandon her domestic responsibilities to travel around the countryside with a group of men. At best, this kind of behavior would have been seen as irresponsible and unacceptable. At worst, it could have been construed as immoral, eliciting all kinds of rumors and inuendos concerning the nature of her character.

But these women were willing to take that risk because they were convinced that Jesus was their long-awaited Messiah. And it seems that Jesus gave them His permission, treating them with dignity and respect, and not as second-class citizens. Luke even indicates that there were other women who accompanied Jesus and they were far from freeloaders. These women used their financial resources to support Jesus and His disciples. But it’s important to recognize that Jesus treated these women with honor, viewing them as far more than sources of financial backing. They were respected members of His growing family and given the same respect and honor as the twelve. Jesus’ treatment of women stood in stark contrast to the surrounding culture in which they were often regarded as little more than property and afforded few rights. In Jesus’ kingdom, there would be no distinction between the sexes. In fact, the apostle Paul makes it clear that all earthly divisions are removed in the Kindom of God.

For you are all children of God through faith in Christ Jesus. And all who have been united with Christ in baptism have put on Christ, like putting on new clothes. There is no longer Jew or Gentile, slave or free, male and female. For you are all one in Christ Jesus. – Galatians 3:26-28 NLT

Beginning in verse 4, Luke gives his version of Jesus’ parable of the sower. Unlike Matthew and Mark, Luke does not provide the setting for Jesus’ teaching. He simply states that a great crowd had gathered from all the surrounding towns and villages. According to the other two gospel authors, this scene took place on the shore of the Sea of Galilee, just outside the town of Capernaum.

Luke’s version of this occasion is much shorter and does not include all of the parables that Jesus taught to the crowds that day. He focuses on the parable of the soil and the parable of the lamp, both of which illustrate the role of faith. As was common with Jesus’ teaching, He used parables to convey spiritual truths through the means of simple stories. But as will be apparent in this situation, Jesus was always focusing His attention on His disciples. The meaning of the parables would be lost on many within the crowd, and Jesus would have to explain to His disciples the hidden truth contained behind the story.

In this case, Jesus used a familiar agricultural metaphor to illustrate a much deeper and significant lesson. Everyone in the crowd would have understood the image of a farmer sowing seed. But Jesus’ main focus was on the receptivity or condition of the various soils on which the seed fell. Some seed fell on the path and was quickly eaten by birds. Other seeds fell among the rocks and eventually sprouted but died away for lack of moisture. The seeds that landed among the thorns were quickly choked out because they were unable to establish roots. But a portion of the seed fell on good soil that had been prepared beforehand. The seed was readily accepted, took root, and yielded “a hundred times as much as had been planted” (Luke 8:8 NLT).

Even as simplistic as this parable appears to be, its meaning escaped Jesus’ disciples. This led them to ask Him for an explanation. And Jesus informed them that they were being given a special privilege to understand things that were hidden from the rest of the crowd. They were being given access to the secrets of the kingdom of God. Jesus was going to explain to them truths regarding His kingdom that even the prophets of old had not understood. The kingdom for which they had long been waiting was going to be different than what they had expected. And entrance into that kingdom would require more than just citizenship in the nation of Israel.

In the parable, all the soils were in the same vicinity. The sower was sowing the same kind of seed in the same general area and expecting the same results: Fruitfulness. But not all the soils were the same. They each received the seed but their ability to produce fruit was hampered by their particular condition. And Jesus informs His disciples that the various soils were intended to represent the hearts of men. Each hears the words, but their ability to respond and believe what they hear is affected by the attacks of the enemy, earthly temptations, and the cares, riches, and pleasures of life. But some “hear God’s word, cling to it, and patiently produce a huge harvest” (Luke 8:15 NLT).

Jesus is letting His disciples know that the good news of the kingdom of God will not be good news to everyone who hears it. Not all will received what He has to say with open arms. They will hear it but refuse to believe it. The enemy will deceive and delude them. The temptations of this world will distract them. The temporal pleasures of this life will overwhelm them. And the message of the kingdom will produce no fruit in their lives. Jesus was preparing His disciples for the inevitable reality that the message of the kingdom would soon be theirs to share and they would discover that not all would receive what they had to say. The gospel of the Kingdom of God would be heard by many but only received by a few. Faith would be the sole requirement for membership in the kingdom. Hearing alone would not be enough. Believing would be necessary.

Relate Like It.

November 11, 2017November 11, 2017 / kdmiller55 / Leave a comment

¹ Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, ²when they see your respectful and pure conduct. ³Do not let your adorning be external–the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear– ⁴but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. ⁵For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, ⁶as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. – 1 Peter 3:1-6 ESV

As Christians, our relationships are to be primary opportunities to live out our new relationship with Christ and to exhibit externally, the inner transformation that is taking place in our hearts because of the work of the Holy Spirit. And there is no more intimate and important relationship than the one between a husband and a wife. Peter was dealing with a situation where there were a growing number of individuals coming to faith in Christ who found themselves married to unbelieving spouses. Keep in mind the locations of those to whom he was writing: Pontus, Galatia, Cappadocia, Asia, and Bithynia. They were living in the northern Roman provinces of Asia Minor, which is modern western Turkey. Not all of his audience would have been Gentiles, because there were literally millions of Jews who had relocated and settled in these very same provinces. But whether Gentiles or Jews, the recipients of his letter were believers who, in many cases, had become followers of Christ without their spouses. This important point will factor into what Peter has to say, because our behavior, as Christians, can have a significant impact on our lost relationships, especially with our unbelieving spouses.

Peter begins with the women. and his words continue to leave many modern-day women shaking their heads and labeling Peter as a male chauvinist. His counsel comes across as archaic and a product of some ancient cultural paradigm that has long lost its relativity. Peter begins his address to wives, saying, “wives, be subject to your own husbands” (1 Peter 3:1 ESV). He would not be the only apostle to communicate this information. Paul would write virtually the same thing: “Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting for those who belong to the Lord” (Colossians 3:18 NLT). He would repeat this statement to the Ephesians: “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22 ESV). Then, in his letter to Titus, Paul provides even more detail, when he challenges the older women in the church:

…train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God. – Titus 2:4-5 NLT

Whether we like what these men have to say, we have to take their words seriously, because they speak for God – that is, if you believe they were inspired by the Holy Spirit, which I do. These are not two 1st-Century Jewish males sharing their personal opinions about women. They are not misogynists. They don’t hate women and are not attempting to place them in a subservient position to their more superior male counterparts. And yet, this is how many modern-day Christians interpret these passages.

What we tend to miss is the definition of the word Peter and Paul use for submission. It is the Greek word, hypotassō, which means “to subject one’s self.” There is a willingness involved, a self-determination or personal decision to submit to another out of love and, in this case, obedience to the will of God. Remember what Paul said? Women are to do it “as to the Lord.” He says, it is “fitting for those who belong to the Lord.” It is what those who belong to God should do. And Peter makes it clear that it doesn’t matter if the woman’s husband is a believer or not. There is a witness involved in all of this. He states that when wives willingly subject themselves to the leadership of their husbands, “Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives” (1 Peter 3:1-2 NLT). What Peter (and by extension, God) is interested in is godly living. This isn’t about rights and privileges, status and personal authority. It is about the cause of Christ, the name of God, and the witness of our lives in a lost and dying world.

But as if this wasn’t enough and Peter had not stepped on enough toes, he wades into even more deadly waters, giving advice on women’s clothing, hair and makeup. Was he just a glutton for punishment or was there a method to his madness? He gives his female readers the following Spirit-inspired counsel:

³Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. ⁴You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God. – 1 Peter 3:3-4 NLT

The first thing we gravitate towards is the fashion advice. It seems that he is telling them how to dress. But what is his real point? “Clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within.” Peter is contrasting our natural obsession with the exterior aspects of our lives with that of the interior, spiritual dimension that reflects the nature of our heart. He talks of inner beauty and the spirit within. How we look is to be far less significant to us than how we behave. And our behavior is a product of our hearts. It was Jesus who said, “It is what comes from inside that defiles you. For from within, out of a person’s heart, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, wickedness, deceit, lustful desires, envy, slander, pride, and foolishness. All these vile things come from within; they are what defile you” (Mark 7:20-23 NLT).

Peter is simply reminding the women in his audience that dressing up the exterior of their lives means nothing if they give no importance to the interior condition of their hearts. They become little more than hypocrites, what Jesus called white-washed tombs. They look great on the outside, but their interiors are filled with death and decay. And that can be true of both women and men.

Peter gives additional insight into what he is saying by comparing the behavior of the “modern-day” women to whom he is writing with the “the holy women of old” (1 Peter 3:5 NLT). There are several points of interest in what he writes and they all relate to the subject of submission. First of all, he says these women of old made themselves beautiful by placing their hope in God. They trusted God for their lives, regardless of the circumstances surrounding their lives. He uses Sarah as an example. She submitted to her husband, Abraham. But how? Remember, it was he who received the call of God to leave Ur and travel to a land yet to be named. And Sarah willingly followed her husband’s lead, even though it meant leaving her family behind. She was inherently trusting God, because her husband was not quite sure how all of this was going to work out. Even later on, when they found themselves moving to Egypt to escape a famine in the land of Canaan, she went along with her husband’s counsel to pawn herself off as his sister. She trusted Abraham, because she was really trusting God.

Secondly, Peter points out that Sarah obeyed Abraham, even calling him “master.” Why? Because she believed he was following the leadership of Yahweh, God Almighty. So, she listened and obeyed. She showed him respect. She didn’t ridicule or belittle him, even when what he said didn’t work out for the best or seem to make any sense. She was trusting God. Third, Sarah was being transformed on the inside. She had her own set of issues. She struggled with doubt and disbelief. And by following her husband’s leadership, she was having her heart changed by God. Finally, Peter uses Sarah as an example of someone who did what was right, according to the will of God. And he tells his female readers that they will be daughters of Sarah if they “do good and do not fear anything that is frightening” (1 Peter 3:6 NLT). Submitting to a Christian husband is scary enough. Submitting to a lost one can be petrifying. But both situations require trust in God. There will be fearful days and moments of doubt. There will be situations that come up where the husband seems to lack any leadership skills or is devoid of common sense. But at the end of the day, believing women are to put their trust in God. They are to see themselves as those who “belong to the Lord” as Paul said. They are to submit, not because their husband deserves it or has earned it, but because it is fitting to the Lord. It reveals a heart that is submissive to God. And He finds that far more attractive than the outward beauty that comes from clothes, cosmetics or jewelry.

These are not easy words for women to hear. They are counter-cultural and seem to go against the grain. But Peter is speaking of deep-seated heart issues. He is addressing matters of character and Christ-likeness. Because when all is said and done, Peter is concerned about our witness in the world. We are sons and daughters of God, and our lives are to be a testimony to His life-transforming, counter-cultural calling on our lives.

New Living Translation (NLT)
Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

The Message (MSG)

Without A Word.

March 13, 2016 / kdmiller55 / Leave a comment

Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external — the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear — but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. – 1 Peter 3:1-6 ESV

Peter now takes his message of submission into the inner sanctum of the home. And for us, as modern-day Christians, this message can have a certain archaic and painfully old-fashioned ring to it. But we must keep what Peter has written on this within the context of his letter and social setting of the day in which he wrote. First of all, the fact that Peter addressed women at all is not something we should miss. In the culture of his day, women often were considered inferior. They were expected to follow the religion of their husbands and were given little say in the matter. And yet, here is Peter addressing women who had placed their faith in Christ. He is speaking to them as a separate group and addressing their specific situation, providing them with insight into how they were supposed to live as believers when their husbands were not. He knew that they were going against the cultural norms of their day. Rather than worship the false gods of their husbands, these women had placed their faith in Christ and now found themselves in a delicate, if not dangerous, place.

It is important that we recognize that Peter is primarily addressing women who are married to unbelievers. His admonition to submit is applicable to all Christian women, whether their husbands are believers or not, but he seems to be putting a special emphasis on wives whose husbands do not share their faith. He says, “wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct” (1 Peter 3:1-2 ESV). The idea of submission has a certain distasteful to many. And while we may not particularly like Peter’s command to submit to those in authority over us when it comes to the government or even the workplace, the idea of wives having to submit to their husbands has a particularly unattractive appeal to many today. But it is important to note that when Peter uses the Greek word hypotasso (“to submit”) he is speaking about a willing coming under another as part of God’s willed order. It has nothing to do with worth or value. It is not an admission of superiority or inferiority (Theological Dictionary of the New Testament, s.v. “hypotasso,” by Gerhard Delling, 8 (1972):44). It has everything to do with God’s divine plan and His children’s conduct and character. Ultimately, all of us are required to submit to someone and we are to see our submission as unto the Lord. Each of us answers to Him. God has ordained an order and a structure to the universe. And while the idea of wives having to be subject to their husbands may rub us the wrong way, it is important to remember that God has a method to His seeming madness.

When we live in this world according to God’s will, submitting to His plan for our lives, it not only pleases Him, but it gives living proof of the change that has taken place within us because of the presence of the indwelling Spirit of God. To expect a believing wife to submit to her unbelieving husband seems unfair and potentially stifling to her faith. But God says that her conduct could have a redemptive aspect to it. Christlike behavior can be a powerful force within our relationships. How we act as Christians can have a major influence on the lost with whom we come in contact. So Peter gives these women some insights into how their behavior can have a saving influence on their husbands. And he goes straight to the heart of the matter: “let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious” (1 Peter 3:4 ESV). Peter’s concern seems to be that women who had discovered their newfound freedom in Christ would allow their behavior to push their unbelieving husbands away from the faith. Believers must never forget that their salvation is not to be viewed in an individualistic way. The good news we have embraced is meant to be shared. Our faith is meant to be lived out among the lost. We are to be salt and light – agents of change and ministers of reconciliation, calling people to be made right with God. That is why the apostle Paul calls on believers to remain as they were when called by God. “To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him” (1 Corinthians 7:12-13 ESV). Our godly influence over the lost in our lives is a big part of God’s plan for our lives.

Much of what Peter says in these verses sounds out of touch with real life. It is counter-cultural and seems to go against the grain of societal expectations. But much of what God expects of us is revolutionary in nature. It is intended to set us apart and requires us to live differently than those around us. It is our ability to do good in the midst of the bad that surrounds us that gets the attention of the lost. Our joy in the midst of sorrow, peace in the middle of the storm, contentment with little, hope in spite of heartache, and our ability to love when treated in unloving ways, that sets us apart.

Paul gives us each some wise words to consider. “Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him. This is my rule in all the churches” (1 Corinthians 7:17 ESV). How does God want to use you right where you are? Who has He placed in your life so that you might have a godly influence over them? Ultimately, our submission to God will lead us to submit to all those with whom we come in contact. We will gladly come under another in order that we might win them over to Christ by our actions.

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