children

God of the Impossible

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24 And the disciples were amazed at his words. But Jesus said to them again, “Children, how difficult it is to enter the kingdom of God! 25 It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the kingdom of God.” 26 And they were exceedingly astonished, and said to him, “Then who can be saved?” 27 Jesus looked at them and said, “With man it is impossible, but not with God. For all things are possible with God.” 28 Peter began to say to him, “See, we have left everything and followed you.” 29 Jesus said, “Truly, I say to you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or lands, for my sake and for the gospel, 30 who will not receive a hundredfold now in this time, houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and lands, with persecutions, and in the age to come eternal life. 31 But many who are first will be last, and the last first.” – Mark 10:24-31 ESV

By this time, the disciples were wishing they had never argued over who was the greatest. Ever since Jesus overheard their childish squabble, He had been giving them a non-stop lecture about what it means to be great in the Kingdom of God. The latest iteration of that lesson came in the form of a rich young man seeking his rightful inheritance. He wanted to know what was keeping him from enjoying the riches and rewards of eternal life right here, right now. He saw himself as a good and righteous man who had kept God’s commands, and he believed his wealth proved God’s blessing on his life. But he wanted more. He sought the ultimate reward: eternal life.

And Jesus confirmed that the man “lacked one thing” (Mark 10:21 ESV). So, He told him to “go, sell all that you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven” (Mark 10:21 ESV). In essence, Jesus told the man he would have to let go of everything he treasured in this life if he wanted to receive the reward of eternal life. This statement from Jesus should have sounded familiar to His disciples. Three years earlier, they had heard Him say something similar in His Sermon on the Mount.

“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” – Matthew 6:19-21 ESV

The young man, unwilling to wait for the treasures of heaven, walked away from Jesus. He ignored Jesus’ call to follow Him and instead returned to his life of wealth and earthly greatness. In doing so, he became an illustration of what Jesus talked about in His sermon.

“No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money.” – Matthew 6:24 ESV

After the man left, Jesus turned to His disciples and said, “How difficult it will be for those who have wealth to enter the kingdom of God!” (Mark 10:23 ESV). This statement shocked them; it went against all their preconceived notions regarding righteousness and rewards. They were raised to believe that wealth was a sign of God’s blessing. After all, even Abraham, the great patriarch of the Hebrew people, had been blessed by God with abundant livestock and great wealth. God had even blessed Joseph, the son of Jacob, who had been sold into slavery by his own brothers. He became the second-most-powerful man in Egypt, and enjoyed great power and prominence. He used these “blessings” to protect his family when a famine came to Canaan.

But Jesus was not saying riches are never a sign of God’s blessing; He was trying to help the disciples understand that the material and physical blessings God bestows can become replacements for God. The gifts begin to take precedence over the Giver. How easy it is to begin worshiping the things of this earth rather than the God of heaven, who gives all good gifts.

Whatever is good and perfect is a gift coming down to us from God our Father… – James 1:17 NLT

We should receive any earthly blessings we get in this life with open arms, but hold them loosely in our hands. The story of Lot vividly reminds us of this. God had greatly blessed Lot with a large family, abundant livestock, riches, and good health. Yet, when tragedy struck and he lost it all, his response was: “I came naked from my mother’s womb, and I will be naked when I leave. The LORD gave me what I had, and the LORD has taken it away. Praise the name of the LORD!” (Job 1:21 NLT).

But Jesus knew His disciples found it hard to accept what He was saying. So He repeated His words in a slightly different, even more controversial way.

“Children, how difficult it is to enter the kingdom of God!” – Mark 10:24 ESV

It must not have escaped the disciples that Jesus addressed them as teknon, the Greek word for a male child. Twice, He had used children to drive home His message concerning greatness in the Kingdom of God.

“Whoever wants to be first must take last place and be the servant of everyone else.”

Then he put a little child among them. Taking the child (paidion) in his arms, he said to them, “Anyone who welcomes a little child (paidion) like this on my behalf welcomes me, and anyone who welcomes me welcomes not only me but also my Father who sent me.” –Mark 9:35-37 NLT

“Let the children (paidion) come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child (paidion) shall not enter it.” And he took them in his arms and blessed them, laying his hands on them. – Mark 10:14-16 NLY

Mark used a different Greek word to record how Jesus addressed His disciples. Jesus wasn’t just calling these grown men children; He was declaring them to be His “sons.” Yet, His point was that they were displaying an ignorance and inability to understand what He was trying to teach them. Like a father, Jesus cared for them deeply and wanted them to understand these deep truths concerning the Kingdom of God. He knew they struggled to accept what He was saying because they needed to unlearn so much. They were weighed down by so many misconceptions concerning the Kingdom of God and how to enter it.

Wealth could not buy you entry into the Kingdom. A good track record of law-keeping could not earn a spot in God’s Kingdom. Gaining access into God’s presence was difficult, and the rich young ruler had failed the test. This left the disciples a bit concerned about their own prospects for success, and what Jesus said next didn’t restore their confidence.

“…it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the Kingdom of God!” – Mark 10:25 NLT

This little parable did nothing to ease their concerns. In fact, Mark describes them as being “exceedingly astonished” at this news, and it led them to ask, “Then who can be saved?” (Mark 10:26 ESV).

You can sense their anxiety. Jesus went from describing entrance into God’s Kingdom as difficult to being impossible. It didn’t take a genius to understand that a camel cannot pass through the eye of a needle. Yet, Jesus was saying the odds were better for that to happen than for a rich man to enter eternity. So, what hope did they have? The disciples had no visible manifestations of God’s blessings. They weren’t rich, influential, or powerful. In their minds, they had nothing going for them. But they failed to recognize that they were teknon, the children or sons of Jesus. They belonged to Him and, as a result, shared an intimate, personal relationship with the Son of God.

But their minds were stuck on Jesus’ camel metaphor.  They understood it was impossible for a camel to pass through the eye of a sewing needle, so was Jesus saying their entrance into the Kingdom was also impossible? Was their salvation at risk?

But Jesus attempted to calm their anxiety by stating, “With man it is impossible, but not with God. For all things are possible with God” (Mark 10:27 ESV). Jesus wanted His “sons” to know that salvation was God’s work, not based on human effort. Entrance into the Kingdom was impossible. Nothing man could do could earn God’s favor or guarantee him a place in the eternal Kingdom. The apostle Paul made this point repeatedly.

For no one can ever be made right with God by doing what the law commands. The law simply shows us how sinful we are. – Romans 3:20 NLT

Yet we know that a person is made right with God by faith in Jesus Christ, not by obeying the law. And we have believed in Christ Jesus, so that we might be made right with God because of our faith in Christ, not because we have obeyed the law. For no one will ever be made right with God by obeying the law. – Galatians 2:16 NLT

If the rich couldn’t buy their way into the Kingdom and law-keeping was not the key that opened the door, what were the disciples to do? They were at a loss for what it would take to secure a place in God’s eternal realm. This led Peter to blurt out, “See, we have left everything and followed you” (Mark 10:28 ESV). He had taken to heart what Jesus had said to the rich young man:

“…go, sell all that you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven…” – Mark 10:21 ESV

Peter assumed the key to eternal life must be a life of sacrifice. If the young man had done what Jesus had said, he would have received exactly what he desired. But Peter missed the point. He wrongly concluded that Jesus meant salvation was reserved for those willing to sell out and follow Him. Like the rich young ruler, Peter wanted Jesus to confirm his suspicions. He hoped Jesus would declare that his life of sacrifice had earned him a place in the Kingdom.

Like a loving father, Jesus let Peter know that he was partially right. Salvation did require self-sacrifice, a point Jesus had already made clear.

“If any of you wants to be my follower, you must give up your own way, take up your cross, and follow me.  If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?” – Matthew 16:24-26 NLT

Following Jesus was costly. Becoming one of His disciples required letting go of the earthly and temporal in order to gain the eternal. But Jesus assured Peter that whatever he had given up in this life would be well worth it. He would be repaid in full and in ways he could never have imagined.

“I assure you that everyone who has given up house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or property, for my sake and for the Good News, will receive now in return a hundred times as many houses, brothers, sisters, mothers, children, and property—along with persecution. And in the world to come that person will have eternal life.” – Mark 10:29-30 NLT

Yes, Peter and his companions had walked away from their careers and families. But Jesus assured them that their sacrifice would come with great blessings. They would become part of a larger extended family and enjoy careers far more fulfilling and impactful than the ones they had given up. And any sacrifices they made in this life would be rewarded in the next one. By making Jesus first and themselves last, they would enjoy eternal life in the Kingdom of God.

Then Jesus added one last lesson on greatness.

“But many who are first will be last, and the last first.” – Mark 10:31 ESV

The scribes and Pharisees, the rich and influential, the powerful and the outwardly righteous were not guaranteed a spot in God’s Kingdom. Citizenship in the Kingdom was reserved for those who recognized their own inadequacy and their need for a Savior. Those who think they are healthy don’t think they need a doctor, but the sick do. And while it was impossible for any man to enter the Kingdom on his own merit or effort, all things are possible with God.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Practically Speaking

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18 Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 19 Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. 20 Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. 21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged. 22 Bondservants, obey in everything those who are your earthly masters, not by way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord. 23 Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, 24 knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. 25 For the wrongdoer will be paid back for the wrong he has done, and there is no partiality.

1 Masters, treat your bondservants justly and fairly, knowing that you also have a Master in heaven. – Colossians 3:18-4:1 ESV

Paul now takes those other-oriented, selfless, and love-motivated character traits and applies them to everyday life. Since he was writing to believers living in Colossae, he customized his words for their particular context. He wanted them to know what seeking and setting their minds on things that are above looks like on a daily basis. He wasn’t promoting some kind of ethereal and impractical brand of religious pietism and asceticism; he was recommending a highly practical brand of faith that revealed the transformative nature of the gospel in everyday life.

They were to “put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator” (Colossians 3:10 ESV). Having been chosen by God, they were to put on “compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience” (Colossians 3:12 ESV). But none of these “add-ons” would be effective without love.

…put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony… – Colossians 3:14 ESV

According to the apostle John, God is love (1 John 4:8), which means true love is the essence of His character, and He best expressed that love through the gift of His Son. That is why Paul calls the Colossians to “do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus” (Colossians 3:17 ESV). As the Son of God, Jesus was the visible manifestation of the invisible God (Colossians 1:15). He was God in human flesh. He physically demonstrated God’s love by coming to earth and carrying out His Father’s will.

Though he was God,
    he did not think of equality with God
    as something to cling to.
Instead, he gave up his divine privileges;
    he took the humble position of a slave
    and was born as a human being.
When he appeared in human form,
   he humbled himself in obedience to God
    and died a criminal’s death on a cross. – Philippians 2:6-8 NLT

So, when Paul tells the Colossians to do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, he is calling them to follow the example of Christ. But what would that look like? How were they supposed to make these powerful admonitions practical? Well, Paul makes it plain and simple for them, and he begins with the family unit, the central source of all relationships in this life.

The family was God’s idea. It was He who originated and ordained the union of one man and one woman, creating an indissoluble bond between them as husband and wife. The creation account found in the opening chapters of Genesis records God’s institution of the first marriage.

So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said,

“This at last is bone of my bones
    and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called Woman,
    because she was taken out of Man.”

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. – Genesis 2:21-24 ESV

Jesus Himself confirmed the validity of the Genesis account by stating, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate” (Matthew 19:4-6 ESV).

So, Paul begins at the beginning, with the family unit. He calls believing wives to submit to their believing husbands. But he adds an important, yet often overlooked, distinction: “as is fitting in the Lord” (Colossians 3:18 ESV). The New Living Translation puts it this way: “as is fitting for those who belong to the Lord.”

For Paul, the use of the word “submission” was directly linked to his call that all believers conduct themselves with compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience (Colossians 3:12). If there was ever a relationship where those characteristics were essential, it was the one between a husband and wife. So, Paul calls wives to lovingly, humbly, meekly, and patiently relate to their husbands in such a way that honors their role as the God-appointed head of the household. Paul provided additional insight into the headship role of the husband when writing to the church in Ephesus.

…submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. – Ephesians 5:21-24 NLT

The biblical concept of submission has nothing to do with superiority or inferiority. Paul is not suggesting that women are somehow second-class citizens; he is simply articulating the divinely-ordained concept of headship within the family unit. Just as Christ is the head of the church, the believing husband is given responsibility for the well-being of his family. And that responsibility comes with a heavy dose of accountability.

Paul made it clear that one of the primary leadership responsibilities of a godly husband was to selflessly love his wife. And, once again, Paul provides further clarity in his letter to the church in Ephesus.

…this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. – Ephesians 5:25-26 NLT

In order to lovingly, graciously submit to her husband, a wife would have to surrender her pride and natural desire for autonomy. In other words, she would have to “put off the old self with its practices” (Colossians 3:9 ESV). Submission doesn’t come naturally or easily; it requires a sacrifice of the human will. In order for anyone to submit in a way that “is fitting for those who belong to the Lord” (Colossians 3:18 NLT), they have to “put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within” (Colossians 3:18 NLT). And according to Peter, submission isn’t something that is reserved for wives alone.

Be subject for the Lord’s sake to every human institution, whether it be to the emperor as supreme, or to governors as sent by him to punish those who do evil and to praise those who do good. For this is the will of God… – 1 Peter 2:13-15 ESV

The life of a believer, regardless of their gender, is to be marked by an attitude of humble submission to others, for this is God’s will. And, according to Paul, one of the greatest displays of death-to-self was a husband’s selfless expression of love for his wife. He was to put his wife’s well-being ahead of his own, both spiritually and physically. He was to be willing to die on her behalf.

At the core of Paul’s teaching on submission is the idea of humility versus pride. There is no place for self-aggrandizement in the life of a believer.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or empty pride, but in humility consider others more important than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. – Philippians 2:3-4 BSB

Even children had a part to play in God’s divine order for the home; they were to obey their parents in everything. Why? Because this is pleasing to the Lord and is in keeping with His divine will. A child’s obedience is a form of submission to the God-ordained authority of their parents. Again, this is not normal or natural. As the proverb states, “Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child…” (Proverbs 22:15 BSB).

It’s interesting to note that disobedience of children to their parents is one of the characteristics Paul listed when describing the future state of the world in the last days.

You should know this, Timothy, that in the last days there will be very difficult times. For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider nothing sacred. They will be unloving and unforgiving; they will slander others and have no self-control. They will be cruel and hate what is good. They will betray their friends, be reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure rather than God. – 2 Timothy 3:1-4 NLT

According to Paul, an obedient child is the byproduct of a loving and godly father.

Fathers, do not aggravate your children, or they will become discouraged. – Colossians 3:21 NLT

It is important to look at the whole thought behind Proverbs 22:15.

Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him. – Proverbs 22:15 BSB

Godly, loving discipline is essential for raising children, but too much discipline, done in an unloving and heavy-handed manner, can do more harm than good. It can cause a child to become discouraged. Discipline that is lacking in compassion can disincentivize a child and make obedience a burden rather than a delight. It can actually result in rebellion rather than submission. So, Paul warns fathers to use their role as heads of their households with care.

Next, Paul moves from addressing the family unit to dealing with another relationship that was ubiquitous in the Colossian community: that of slavery. While we find this topic uncomfortable and somewhat off-putting, it was a normal part of everyday life for the citizens of Colossae.

“Scholars estimate about 10% (but possibly up to 20%) of the Roman empire’s population were enslaved. This would mean, for an estimated Roman empire population of 50 million (in the first century AD) between five and ten million were enslaved. This number would have been unequally distributed across the empire, with a higher concentration of enslaved people in urban areas and in Italy.” – https://www.britishmuseum.org/exhibitions/nero-man-behind-myth/slavery-ancient-rome

Slavery was an everyday part of daily life in Colossae. Yet Paul didn’t attempt to address the moral implications of slavery. Instead, he tried to show the Colossian believers how their new identity in Christ should impact every area of life. The reality was that slaves were coming to faith in Christ and becoming a part of the local faith community. It was likely that the church in Colossae had slaves attending worship services with their own masters, and this presented a particularly difficult problem for Paul and the church’s leaders. How were these people supposed to relate to one another? How was their mutual relationship with Christ to impact their interpersonal relationship with one another?

Paul addresses both parties. He tells slaves, “Obey your earthly masters in everything you do. Try to please them all the time, not just when they are watching you. Serve them sincerely because of your reverent fear of the Lord” (Colossians 3:22 NLT). Then he tells masters, “Be just and fair to your slaves. Remember that you also have a Master—in heaven” (Colossians 4:1 NLT).

Notice his emphasis on God. Both parties were to recognize that their earthly relationships had been dramatically altered by their new identity as God’s children. While nothing had changed regarding their earthly status, Paul wanted them to know that God viewed them in a whole new light.

In this new life, it doesn’t matter if you are a Jew or a Gentile, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbaric, uncivilized, slave, or free. Christ is all that matters, and he lives in all of us. – Colossians 3:11 NLT

There is an invaluable and universal lesson to be learned from Paul’s words to slaves. These were individuals who had no choice regarding their condition. Their position as slaves required total submission, whether they wanted to or not. But Paul challenged them to take a different attitude.

Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Remember that the Lord will give you an inheritance as your reward, and that the Master you are serving is Christ. – Colossians 3:23-24 NLT

And this applied to every believer in the local church in Colossae. It’s what Paul meant when he wrote, “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth” (Colossians 3:2 ESV). A slave was to live his life with an eternal perspective, knowing that his current circumstances were temporal. There was a reward awaiting him that made his present suffering pale in comparison. And that heavenly-minded, future-focused perspective was to motivate the life of every believer in Colossae, regardless of their gender, race, or social standing.

Father, You intended for our salvation to make a difference right here, right now, not just in the future. Our ultimate glorification is a wonderful reality that should motivate our present behavior. As Your children and heirs of the glory that awaits us, we should live our lives in a way that reflects our set-apart status and reflects our appreciation for Your love, grace, and mercy. While this life may throw us curveballs and make it difficult to focus on the promise of our future life with You, we have the Holy Spirit to encourage and empower us to live godly lives in an increasingly godless world. And Paul calls us to make our hope in Your pending promises practical and personal. As we await Your Son’s return, we are to live like He could come back any day. We have opportunities every day to model His life of love, sacrifice, selflessness, and submission, in our homes, marriages, communities, workplaces, and local congregations, knowing that we will receive the inheritance You have promised as our reward. Amen

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT)
Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

The High Privilege of Parenting

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1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” 4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. – Ephesians 6:1-4 ESV

When considering Paul’s call for believers to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ, it is important to remember that this is impossible without the power of the Holy Spirit. Yes, you could pull it off in your own power for a season, but it wouldn’t be long before your old sin nature raised its ugly head, causing pride and self-centeredness to take center stage again. For wives to submit to their husbands and husbands to sacrificially love their wives, the Holy Spirit is a non-negotiable necessity. He alone can provide the fruit we need to “walk as children of light (for the fruit of light is found in all that is good and right and true” (Ephesians 5:8 ESV).

Here in Chapter 6, Paul draws our attention to yet another relationship in which the fruit of the Spirit will be essential; he calls for children to obey their parents. The Greek word Paul uses is hypakouō, which conveys the idea of hearing as well as obeying. It implies a child submitting to the God-given authority of their parents, and that the obedience rendered to them must be “in the Lord,” which is another way of saying “out of reverence for Christ” (Ephesians 5:21 ESV). Just as wives are to submit to their husbands “as to the Lord,” children are to obey their parents with an awareness that they are really submitting to the will of God for their lives.

Paul knows this will be very difficult for young children to comprehend. Even after a child comes to faith in Christ, they will have difficulty understanding what it means to obey in the Lord. That is where the careful, patient, and persistent training from godly parents comes in. Even very young children are naturally prone to disobedience. Their wills develop quickly, and their innate desire to do what they want shows up very early in their development. Obedience is not natural to children. They may not initially realize they are being disobedient, but their natural drive toward autonomy will lead them to choose their own will over their parents’.

In these first three verses, Paul seems to address two phases of childhood, starting with young children and then focusing on adult children. After commanding children to obey, Paul turns to the Mosaic law and quotes the fifth commandment: “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you” (Exodus 20:12 ESV). And he adds a side note: “This is the first commandment with a promise” (Ephesians 6:2 ESV).

Paul calls for honor, not just obedience. The word “honor” carries with it the idea of reverence and veneration. In Hebrew, it is kabad, which means “heaviness” or “weight.” There should be a sense of weightiness or significance that adult children give to the God-given role of their parents in their lives. While young children will not be able to grasp the significance of this concept, older children, especially adult children, can and should.

It is interesting to note that in Deuteronomy 6, Moses told the people of Israel, “Now this is the commandment — the statutes and the rules — that the Lord your God commanded me to teach you, that you may do them in the land to which you are going over, to possess it, that you may fear the Lord your God, you and your son and your son’s son, by keeping all his statutes and his commandments, which I command you, all the days of your life, and that your days may be long” (Deuteronomy 6:1-2 ESV).

Moses was calling the people of God to obedience so that their days would be long in the land. Then Moses went on to give them the motivating factor behind their obedience to God:

You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. – Deuteronomy 6:5-9 ESV

Verse five contains the Shema, which Jesus would later say is the greatest commandment. Love is to be the primary motivating factor behind obedience to God. And Paul seems to be saying that, ultimately, love should underlie children’s obedience to their parents and the honor they give them in their later years. But for this to happen, Moses said parents were to teach their children diligently. They were to talk about the things of God all the time. Obedience to God was to be a constant topic in the home, and parents were to be the primary source of instruction and illustration of what that obedience looks like.

Which is why Paul addresses fathers. In God’s economy, fathers are held to a higher standard; they are responsible for the spiritual well-being of their household. So Paul warns fathers about provoking or exasperating their children. Nothing will frustrate a child more than inconsistency in their father’s life. His behavior toward and in front of his children will have a dramatic impact on their spiritual well-being. Parental hypocrisy is one of the most damaging influences on a child’s life. Fathers who say one thing and do another end up frustrating and confusing their children. Fathers who demand one set of standards for their children while failing to apply those standards to themselves will cause anger and resentment in their children. Which is why Paul says, “Fathers, don’t provoke your children to anger” (Ephesians 6:4 ESV).

Another surprising cause of anger within children is a lack of discipline. Children need boundaries, supervision, and discipline in their lives. This will require the parents to train their children, and the father is ultimately responsible. A father who is overly strict or heavy-handed in his discipline will end up exasperating his children. But it is also true that a father who is lax in providing his children with loving discipline and godly instruction will provoke his children to anger. That is why Paul tells fathers to bring up their children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. It should be the goal of every believing parent to raise godly children. While we can’t cause our children to come to faith in Christ, we can provide an environment in which the truth of the gospel is lived out in their presence and the love of God is modeled in their lives.

Parenting is a God-ordained role that comes with weighty responsibilities. But the Psalmist reminds us that “children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them!” (Psalm 127:3-5 ESV). Our children are to be seen as blessings, not burdens. Their presence in our home is a gift from God, an inheritance designed to outlast our lives and bring Him glory for generations to come. But the hope of their future faithfulness begins under our watch and depends on our willingness to “bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4 ESV).  What we say and do matters. How we live and love makes a difference. Faith cannot be inherited, but faithfulness to God can be modeled so that the next generation can learn of His goodness and greatness. 

We will not hide these truths from our children;
    we will tell the next generation
about the glorious deeds of the Lord,
    about his power and his mighty wonders.

He commanded our ancestors
    to teach them to their children,
so the next generation might know them—
    even the children not yet born—
    and they in turn will teach their own children.
So each generation should set its hope anew on God,
    not forgetting his glorious miracles
    and obeying his commands.
Then they will not be like their ancestors—
    stubborn, rebellious, and unfaithful,
    refusing to give their hearts to God. – Psalm 78:4, 5-8 NLT

Father, the job of parenting is never done. Even as our children leave the nest, we find ourselves still listening, loving, guiding, and directing. Even as our children move into adulthood, they continue to watch our lives and  mirror our behavior. They may stop asking our advice, but they continue to recall the lessons we taught them along the way, both good and bad. The things we said and did when they were young are seared into their memories. What we do when they are young has long-term implications. Even when we are gone, they will still remember our words and actions. They will recall the life lessons we imparted and either embrace or reject them. The degree of our faithfulness to God when they were young will either motivate or demoralize them when they are older. Give us the strength to parent well, to grandparent faithfully. Don’t let us grow weary in doing good. Holy Spirit, empower and equip us to run the race well and to finish strong. Our children’s lives depend upon it. We cannot save them, but we can provide them with a safe and fertile environment in which truth is taught, love is boundless, patience is abundant, and faith is lived out in everyday life. Amen

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

The Christian Life Is Far From Easy

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12 To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. 13 If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. 15 But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. 16 For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? – 1 Corinthians 7:12-16 ESV

This is an extremely difficult passage, and there are as many opinions concerning it as there are commentaries that have been written about it. First of all, when Paul says, “To the rest I say, (I, not the Lord)” (1 Corinthians 7:7 ESV), he is not implying that what he has to say concerning these matters is simply his personal opinion and not divinely inspired. He is merely indicating that this is not something he heard taught by Jesus Himself. But as an expert in the Old Testament and an apostle of Jesus Christ, and because what he was writing was divinely inspired by the Spirit of God, his words must be considered as coming from God.

His emphasis in these verses shifts from addressing married couples who are comprised of believing husbands and wives. Now he is addressing those who, after coming to faith in Christ, find themselves married to an unbeliever. This would have been a common scenario in the church in Corinth. There were likely a good many who came to faith apart from their spouse and who found themselves in a potentially difficult and compromising circumstance. If there were children involved, the situation was even more complicated.

There were obviously those who counseled that it would be better for a Christian to divorce their unbelieving spouse than to remain married. Paul even gave what appears to be similar counsel in his second letter to the Corinthians.

Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? – 2 Corinthians 6:14-15 ESV

While this passage has been used to defend a ban on Christians marrying non-Christians, that was likely not Paul’s original point. He was addressing the need to avoid the kinds of relationships with unbelievers that might lead to spiritual defilement. This obviously applies to marriage, but is not restricted to it. Paul was not counseling or sanctioning that Christians separate themselves completely from the world because that would be impossible. In fact, earlier in this letter, he referred to another piece of correspondence to the Corinthians in which he had cautioned them, “not to associate with sexually immoral people” (1 Corinthians 5:9 ESV). But he clarified what he meant.

But I wasn’t talking about unbelievers who indulge in sexual sin, or are greedy, or cheat people, or worship idols. You would have to leave this world to avoid people like that. I meant that you are not to associate with anyone who claims to be a believer yet indulges in sexual sin, or is greedy, or worships idols, or is abusive, or is a drunkard, or cheats people. Don’t even eat with such people. – 1 Corinthians 5:10-11 NLT

So Paul was not proposing some form of Christian isolationism.

So, what is a Christian to do who finds themselves married to an unbeliever? Paul’s main point in this passage is divorce, and Paul would say that it is wrong for a believer to divorce their unbelieving spouse. Rather, they should view their salvation in a positive light and attempt to be a godly influence on their unbelieving spouse. Their very presence within the home sanctified it or set it apart.

It is difficult to know exactly what Paul meant when he wrote, “the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband” (1 Corinthians 7:14 ESV). It would be inconsistent with the rest of Scripture to say that Paul was implying the believing spouse somehow“saves” the marriage or converts the unbelieving partner. The lost spouse is made “holy” only in the sense that he or she finds themselves benefiting from the presence of a believer living within the same walls.

Living in close proximity to a redeemed, Spirit-filled spouse would have beneficial consequences. This is true of the children in the home as well. Paul is not suggesting that the unbelieving children of a household with a single believing parent are guaranteed salvation. This conclusion is illogical and unbiblical. Even children living in a household with two believing parents are not automatically made members of the household of God. But in a sense, they have been set apart by God by virtue of His having called one of their parents to a saving relationship with His Son.

The real point of these verses deals with what a believer is to do if their unbelieving spouse chooses to divorce them. The truth is that the very presence of a Christian in the home could drive the unbelieving partner away. As Peter indicates in his letter, there is a chance that a godly wife could have a positive impact on her unbelieving husband.

In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives. – 1 Peter 3:1-2 NLT)

But there is also the strong possibility that her presence could produce conviction within the unbelieving spouse that results in conflict. There is no guarantee that a lost spouse will be led to the Lord by the believing partner. That is what Paul means when he asks, “For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?” (1 Corinthians 7:16 ESV). So

Paul’s counsel is that if a Christian finds themselves served divorce papers by an unbelieving spouse, they should not fight it. But at the same time, they should not be the instigators of divorce. Paul simply says, “If the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved” (1 Corinthians 7:15a ESV). His bottom-line goal was peace, not conflict. That is why he states, “God has called you to peace” (1 Corinthians 7:15b ESV).

God receives no glory from a marriage in which two unequally yoked individuals fight and feud with one another. If the marriage is relatively conflict-free and the unbelieving partner is willing to remain married, the Christian should in no way seek divorce. A few verses later, Paul writes, “Each one should remain in the condition in which he was called” (1 Corinthians 7:20 ESV).

These are difficult words, but they deal with the reality of the gospel entering into a difficult and desperately depraved world. When light shines in the darkness, conflict is inevitable. When believers come into contact with the lost, there will be tension, testing, and the potential for trouble. Jesus warned us that the world would hate us.

“If the world hates you, remember that it hated me first. The world would love you as one of its own if you belonged to it, but you are no longer part of the world. I chose you to come out of the world, so it hates you.” – John 15:18-18 NLT

Our redemption as believers places a target on our backs and makes us a prime candidate for persecution by the enemy. The life of a believer is not an easy one. Our call to live set-apart lives in a world that is set against us will not be a cake walk. We will be misunderstood, and, at times, we will be mistreated. But we will never be abandoned by our God.

Father, Jesus never said the Christian life would be easy. In fact, He wanted that it would be full of trials and difficulties. Paul was trying to encourage new believers who found themselves dealing with real-world problems that were testing their faith and causing them to lose hope. Having accepted Christ as their Savior, they were surrounded by lost friends and family members who were making their faith journey difficult. Many believers face the same challenges today. Yet, You have provided us with the body of Christ, the Word of God, and the promise of the indwelling presence and power of Your Spirit. Yet, our very presence in this world puts a target on our back. Salvation makes us a prime candidate for spiritual warfare because the enemy sees us as a threat to his earthly kingdom. Show us how to live distintinctively different lives in whatever context You saved us. Don’t allow us to run from difficulty, but, instead, give us the boldness to live out our faith in whatever context we find ourselves. Help us be salt and light in our marriages, families, work places, communitites, and churches. For Your glory and the good of all those who do not yet know Christ as their Savior. Amen

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Dancing On the Edge

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12 And it was told King David, “The Lord has blessed the household of Obed-edom and all that belongs to him, because of the ark of God.” So David went and brought up the ark of God from the house of Obed-edom to the city of David with rejoicing. 13 And when those who bore the ark of the Lord had gone six steps, he sacrificed an ox and a fattened animal. 14 And David danced before the Lord with all his might. And David was wearing a linen ephod. 15 So David and all the house of Israel brought up the ark of the Lord with shouting and with the sound of the horn.

16 As the ark of the Lord came into the city of David, Michal the daughter of Saul looked out of the window and saw King David leaping and dancing before the Lord, and she despised him in her heart. 17 And they brought in the ark of the Lord and set it in its place, inside the tent that David had pitched for it. And David offered burnt offerings and peace offerings before the Lord. 18 And when David had finished offering the burnt offerings and the peace offerings, he blessed the people in the name of the Lord of hosts 19 and distributed among all the people, the whole multitude of Israel, both men and women, a cake of bread, a portion of meat, and a cake of raisins to each one. Then all the people departed, each to his house.

20 And David returned to bless his household. But Michal the daughter of Saul came out to meet David and said, “How the king of Israel honored himself today, uncovering himself today before the eyes of his servants’ female servants, as one of the vulgar fellows shamelessly uncovers himself!” 21 And David said to Michal, “It was before the Lord, who chose me above your father and above all his house, to appoint me as prince over Israel, the people of the Lord—and I will celebrate before the Lord. 22 I will make myself yet more contemptible than this, and I will be abased in your eyes. But by the female servants of whom you have spoken, by them I shall be held in honor.” 23 And Michal the daughter of Saul had no child to the day of her death. – 2 Samuel 6:12-23 ESV

When David’s first attempt to bring the Ark of the Covenant into Jerusalem ended with the untimely death of Uzzah, he angrily ordered the ark to be left in the care of Obed-edom. But three months later, he had second thoughts when he received word that the house of Obed-edom had been blessed because of the presence of the ark. He immediately ordered a second attempt to move the ark into his new capital, and this time he did it God’s way.

The passage reads, “…when those who bore the ark of the Lord had gone six steps” (2 Samuel 6:12 ESV). This time, there was no cart, no oxen, and no alternative method of transport used. He moved the ark using God’s prescribed method. The book of First Chronicles provides the details.

David built houses for himself in the city of David. And he prepared a place for the ark of God and pitched a tent for it. Then David said that no one but the Levites may carry the ark of God, for the Lord had chosen them to carry the ark of the Lord and to minister to him forever. – 1 Chronicles 15:1-2 ESV

David had learned a painful but valuable lesson from his first attempt to move the Ark and, on this occasion, he made sure to enlist the aid of the Levites.

“You are the heads of the fathers’ houses of the Levites. Consecrate yourselves, you and your brothers, so that you may bring up the ark of the Lord, the God of Israel, to the place that I have prepared for it. Because you did not carry it the first time, the Lord our God broke out against us, because we did not seek him according to the rule.” So the priests and the Levites consecrated themselves to bring up the ark of the Lord, the God of Israel. And the Levites carried the ark of God on their shoulders with the poles, as Moses had commanded according to the word of the Lord. – 1 Chronicles 15:12-15 ESV

But the book of First Chronicles also provides us with an interesting insight into what David had been doing in the three months before his second attempt to move the ark. According to 1 Chronicles 15, “David built houses for himself in the city of David.” However, it is the previous chapter that provides the extent of David’s building efforts.

And Hiram king of Tyre sent messengers to David, and cedar trees, also masons and carpenters to build a house for him. And David knew that the Lord had established him as king over Israel, and that his kingdom was highly exalted for the sake of his people Israel.

And David took more wives in Jerusalem, and David fathered more sons and daughters. These are the names of the children born to him in Jerusalem: Shammua, Shobab, Nathan, Solomon, Ibhar, Elishua, Elpelet, Nogah, Nepheg, Japhia, Elishama, Beeliada and Eliphelet. – 1 Chronicles 14:1-7 ESV

David had been busy building his house in more ways than one. His efforts included construction and conception. He was building a palace and a legacy. But the second part of his building efforts was in direct violation of God’s commands concerning polygamy.

“The king must not take many wives for himself, because they will turn his heart away from the Lord.” – Deuteronomy 17:17 NLT

David had an inordinate attraction to women, and their presence proved to be a distraction and a constant source of trouble in his life.

But the other interesting insight gleaned from the Chronicles passage is that, while David built a brick-and-mortar house for himself, he simply “pitched a tent” for the Ark of the Covenant. He would later regret this oversight and voice his desire to build a great house for God (2 Samuel 7). But at this point in his reign, it appears that David was busy establishing and solidifying his rule with all the trappings of kingly success; at least, according to the worldly standards of his day.

But back to the story. David led the procession of Levites, priests, and musicians into the city of Jerusalem. For this momentous occasion, David donned a simple linen gown instead of his royal robes. This “ephod” was a garment modeled after the robes worn by the priests. In 1 Samuel 2:18, the young boy, Samuel, is described as wearing “a linen garment like that of a priest.” According to the Book of Exodus, the ephod consisted of “two pieces, front and back, joined at the shoulders with two shoulder-pieces” (Exodus 28:7 NLT). 

As a sign of humility, David set aside his royal robes and assumed the status of a worshiper. He even ordered the offering of sacrifices along the way, ensuring that this procession made it all the way to Jerusalem without incident. This was a joyous occasion and David set the tone by dancing before the Lord with all his might (2 Samuel 6:14). But not everyone was impressed by David’s actions.

…as the Ark of the Lord entered the City of David, Michal, the daughter of Saul, looked down from her window. When she saw King David leaping and dancing before the Lord, she was filled with contempt for him. – 2 Samuel 6:16 NLT

As the First Chronicles passage revealed, David had many wives, but Michal had the distinction of being his first. During his years of exile, David was forced to leave Michal behind and she ended up marrying another man. When David became king over the 11 tribes of Israel, he demanded that she be returned to him. Nothing is said of Michal’s feelings about being reunited with David, but her response to his very public display of unkingly behavior speaks volumes. The text states that “she despised him in her heart” (2 Samuel 6:16 ESV). No reason is given for her deep disdain for David. Was it his choice of attire? Did his dancing embarrass her? Perhaps she was angry that he was bringing the Ark of the Covenant into Jerusalem. It’s clear from 1 Samuel 19:11-16 that Michal kept an idol of a false god in their home. So, it could be that she resented David bringing in what she believed to be an idol to his God.

While the motivation behind her anger is unstated, her dissatisfaction is crystal clear.

“How distinguished the king of Israel looked today, shamelessly exposing himself to the servant girls like any vulgar person might do!” – 2 Samuel 6:20 NLT

She was disgusted with David’s embarrassing lack of decorum, and there was far more behind her anger and resentment toward David than just his choice of attire and dancing skills. Michal was a conflicted woman who was dealing with a great deal of emotional and psychological baggage. She had fallen in love with David when he was a young man serving in her father’s court. But when her father turned on David and he was forced to run for his life, she became an abandoned woman. During David’s years of exile, she was given to another man and started a new life. But when David ascended to the throne, she was forcibly taken from her husband and returned to David – only to find out that he had acquired many other wives.

Michal found herself living with her former husband and his growing harem of wives and their many children. This too may have added to Michal’s anger because it appears she was childless. which was not an attractive proposition for any woman in those days, especially the wife of the king. The text tells us that Michal would remain childless. Because of her hostile reaction to David, it appears he lost any affection he still held for her. Their marriage was essentially over at that point. She would remain one of his queens but she would no longer enjoy his favor or ever bear him a son.

It is impossible to read this story and not see the stark contrast between celebration and disintegration. David was building his kingdom while at the same time watching his relationship with Michal fall apart. He was constructing a house in which he would rule and reign, but he was also multiplying a household in direct violation of God’s commands. His many wives and their multitude of children would eventually bring disorder and destruction to his kingdom.

His worship of God is contrasted with his propensity to flaunt the will of God. This man after God’s own heart exhibits a strange mix of humility and pride. He was obsessed with establishing his image as a king, but also willing to humble himself before the God who had placed him on the throne. In David’s response to Michal, you get a subtle sense of his pride mixed with humility.

“I was dancing before the Lord, who chose me above your father and all his family! He appointed me as the leader of Israel, the people of the Lord, so I celebrate before the Lord. Yes, and I am willing to look even more foolish than this, even to be humiliated in my own eyes! But those servant girls you mentioned will indeed think I am distinguished!” – 2 Samuel 6:21-22 NLT

David knew that it was God who had made him king but he also enjoyed the fact that he was the king. He displays a subtle sense of superiority and pride in his statement. He had been chosen by God. He was the king. And while he was willing to humble himself before God, he was also counting on the fact that God was going to distinguish him as a king. Dancing and disdain. Pride and humility. Celebration and disintegration. Palaces and tents. Worship and wives. Blessings and barrenness. Burnt offerings and burned relationships.

This is a passage of contrasts, and David’s reign would be one of contradictions and conflicts. There would be times of great blessing and significance, but there would also be times of pain, sorrow, and disobedience. David was going to continue to learn the truth found in the words of Samuel, spoken to David’s predecessor.

“What is more pleasing to the LORD: your burnt offerings and sacrifices or your obedience to his voice? Listen! Obedience is better than sacrifice, and submission is better than offering the fat of rams.” – 1 Samuel 15:22 NLT

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

A Healthy Home Life

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1 Be not envious of evil men,
    nor desire to be with them,
2 for their hearts devise violence,
    and their lips talk of trouble.

3 By wisdom a house is built,
    and by understanding it is established;
4 by knowledge the rooms are filled
    with all precious and pleasant riches.
5 A wise man is full of strength,
    and a man of knowledge enhances his might,
6 for by wise guidance you can wage your war,
    and in abundance of counselors there is victory.
7 Wisdom is too high for a fool;
    in the gate he does not open his mouth.

8 Whoever plans to do evil
    will be called a schemer.
9 The devising of folly is sin,
    and the scoffer is an abomination to mankind.

10 If you faint in the day of adversity,
    your strength is small.
11 Rescue those who are being taken away to death;
    hold back those who are stumbling to the slaughter.
12 If you say, “Behold, we did not know this,”
    does not he who weighs the heart perceive it?
Does not he who keeps watch over your soul know it,
    and will he not repay man according to his work?

13 My son, eat honey, for it is good,
    and the drippings of the honeycomb are sweet to your taste.
14 Know that wisdom is such to your soul;
    if you find it, there will be a future,
    and your hope will not be cut off.

15 Lie not in wait as a wicked man against the dwelling of the righteous;
    do no violence to his home;
16 for the righteous falls seven times and rises again,
    but the wicked stumble in times of calamity.

17 Do not rejoice when your enemy falls,
    and let not your heart be glad when he stumbles,
18 lest the Lord see it and be displeased,
    and turn away his anger from him.

19 Fret not yourself because of evildoers,
    and be not envious of the wicked,
20 for the evil man has no future;
    the lamp of the wicked will be put out.

21 My son, fear the Lord and the king,
    and do not join with those who do otherwise,
22 for disaster will arise suddenly from them,
    and who knows the ruin that will come from them both? – Proverbs 24:1-22 ESV

If one had to choose a summary statement for this section of Solomon’s book, verses 3-7 would work well. In them, Solomon provides a fitting synopsis for his collection of 36 wise sayings and clearly articulates the primary message he is attempting to convey.

A house is built by wisdom
    and becomes strong through good sense.
Through knowledge its rooms are filled
    with all sorts of precious riches and valuables. – Proverbs 24:3-4 NLT

Solomon was a highly successful king who ruled over a prosperous kingdom but he was also a father who cared deeply for his children, of which he had many. With 700 wives and 300 concubines, Solomon had no shortage of progeny. Kids would have been everywhere and it seems that he took a keen interest in their education and preparation for life beyond the palace. Solomon took his role as a powerful potentate seriously but he also placed a high priority on parenting. And in a patriarchal society, he took a special interest in raising up sons who would live wise and godly lives.

In Solomon’s day, there would have been very few books on the topic of parenting. Today, they’re everywhere. You can even attend any of a number of seminars on the topic or watch countless YouTube videos on the subject. You can get parenting advice, both good and bad, from all kinds of people. They’ll tell you about the importance of communication, the need for consistent discipline, the danger of a home without rules, and the damage that can be done if your home is too strict.

Everyone has opinions. Everyone is ready to give their advice. But there are few who truly know the secret to having a healthy, thriving family – except Solomon. The Hebrew word he used for “house” in verse four can also be translated as “family” and is probably best seen as a metaphor for establishing a strong, vibrant home life, not building a structure.

We all know that a well-built house is no guarantee of a healthy, whole family. There are many beautiful homes in the best of neighborhoods filled with children who despise their parents. Those same houses are occupied by husbands and wives who no longer love one another and where domestic bliss is nowhere to be found.

No, Solomon is not giving us construction tips, but the key to a healthy family. And this advice applies not only to our biological family but to our spiritual family as well. The church, the body of Christ, is also a family. As believers, we are all members of the family of God and are His children. And just like our biological family, the family of God can become dysfunctional and unhealthy if we ignore the counsel of Solomon.

He tells us a home or a family is built on wisdom. This should remind us of Solomon’s advice found in the very first chapter of his book: “Start with God – the first step in learning is bowing down to God” (Proverbs 1:7 MSG).

This is a paraphrase from The Message, but it paints a very accurate description of what it means to “fear the Lord.” To fear the Lord is to recognize that He is God and we are not. It is to understand that He is the sole source of all wisdom, not us. It is to humble ourselves under His mighty power, recognizing our own weakness. The key to gaining wisdom is to start with God. It is focusing all of our attention on Him and making Him the center of our lives. This is true when it comes to our homes or families. He has to be number one. Not our kids. Not our careers. Not our marriages. Not our own selfish wills and self-centered desires. We must start with God. Our homes must be built on Him. He must be the foundation on which we construct our families. Marriage is difficult. Raising kids is a real challenge. Having a healthy family in the world in which we live is next to impossible – unless you do it with God’s help. Only He can give us the wisdom we need, the good sense we require, the knowledge life demands, and the outcome we desire.

Solomon wanted his sons to grow up to be wise and he knew that godliness was a prerequisite for both goodness and greatness.

The wise are mightier than the strong,
    and those with knowledge grow stronger and stronger.
So don’t go to war without wise guidance;
   victory depends on having many advisers. – Proverbs 24:5-6 NLT

If they were going to be successful in life, they would have to make God their highest priority. God can’t be an add-on or an afterthought. He would need to be the focus of their lives and their families. Solomon desperately desired that his sons would make God’s Word a daily part of our lives and the manual by which they parented their own children. The truths he was sharing were meant to be passed on – from generation to generation. These wise sayings were timeless and worthy of obeying and repeating.

Don’t envy evil people
    or desire their company.
For their hearts plot violence,
    and their words always stir up trouble. – Proverbs 24:1-2 NLT

A person who plans evil
    will get a reputation as a troublemaker.
The schemes of a fool are sinful;
    everyone detests a mocker. – Proverbs 24:8-9 NLT

Yes, Solomon wanted his sons to implement these timeless truths but he also longed to see them propagated through the future generations of his descendants. Solomon understood that godly wisdom was to be passed on to others. It must be modeled. And, like so much in life, wisdom is better caught than taught. Children must see that their parents not only believe in God but that they obey Him. They must see that their parent’s faith is real and that it manifests itself in real life.

Solomon tells us that if we begin with God and constantly turn to God, He will give us wisdom, good sense, and knowledge. And as a result, our homes will be filled with “all sorts of precious riches and valuables” (Proverbs 24:4 NLT). But to enjoy all the benefits that wisdom has to offer, it must be sought after and consumed.

My child, eat honey, for it is good,
    and the honeycomb is sweet to the taste.
In the same way, wisdom is sweet to your soul.
    If you find it, you will have a bright future,
    and your hopes will not be cut short. – Proverbs 24:13-14 NLT

His promise of a bright future is a guarantee of financial success, but a reminder that living God’s way produces treasures that are priceless and not of this world. In comparison, Solomon states that “evil people have no future” (Proverbs 24:20 NLT). Their prosperity is temporary while their long-term prospects are bleak.

He will repay all people as their actions deserve. – Proverbs 24:12 NLT

Solomon promotes a godly lifestyle. He encourages his sons to seek the way of the wise. Yes, they may find themselves the envy of all those around them and even discover that they are under attack for their chosen way of life, but they must remain determined to pursue righteousness and not wickedness.

Don’t wait in ambush at the home of the godly,
    and don’t raid the house where the godly live.
The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again. – Proverbs 24:15-16 NLT

Solomon calmly and confidently tells his sons: “Don’t fret because of evildoers…” (Proverbs 24:19 NLT). Don’t let them distract you with their attacks. And don’t become jealous of their apparent success. No, when all is said and done, Solomon wanted his sons to live in a state of reverent fear of God. From Solomon’s perspective, there were only two entities in life that should instill a sense of fear and awe. One was God and the other was the king. They alone had the power to punish the wicked.

My child, fear the Lord and the king.
Don’t associate with rebels,
    for disaster will hit them suddenly.
Who knows what punishment will come
    from the Lord and the king? – Proverbs 24:21-22 NLT

For Solomon, there was no higher priority than to raise godly sons who would establish godly homes and raise godly children. And it all tied back to a warning that God had given when Solomon had dedicated the temple he had built in Jerusalem.

“As for you, if you will follow me with integrity and godliness, as David your father did, obeying all my commands, decrees, and regulations, then I will establish the throne of your dynasty over Israel forever. For I made this promise to your father, David: ‘One of your descendants will always sit on the throne of Israel.’

“But if you or your descendants abandon me and disobey the commands and decrees I have given you, and if you serve and worship other gods, then I will uproot Israel from this land that I have given them. I will reject this Temple that I have made holy to honor my name. I will make Israel an object of mockery and ridicule among the nations.” – 1 Kings 9:4-7 NLT

Solomon wasn’t simply interested in passing on helpful tips for living life. He was intent on securing the future of his home and family for generations to come. His greatest desire was that his future descendants would follow the Lord with integrity and godliness.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

New English Translation (NET)NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2017 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.

Good Kids Gone Bad

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17 Whoever is generous to the poor lends to the Lord,
    and he will repay him for his deed.
18 Discipline your son, for there is hope;
    do not set your heart on putting him to death.
19 A man of great wrath will pay the penalty,
    for if you deliver him, you will only have to do it again.
20 Listen to advice and accept instruction,
    that you may gain wisdom in the future.
21 Many are the plans in the mind of a man,
    but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.
22 What is desired in a man is steadfast love,
    and a poor man is better than a liar.
23 The fear of the Lord leads to life,
    and whoever has it rests satisfied;
    he will not be visited by harm.
24 The sluggard buries his hand in the dish
    and will not even bring it back to his mouth.
25 Strike a scoffer, and the simple will learn prudence;
    reprove a man of understanding, and he will gain knowledge.
26 He who does violence to his father and chases away his mother
    is a son who brings shame and reproach.
27 Cease to hear instruction, my son,
    and you will stray from the words of knowledge.
28 A worthless witness mocks at justice,
    and the mouth of the wicked devours iniquity.
29 Condemnation is ready for scoffers,
    and beating for the backs of fools. – Proverbs 19:17-29 ESV

A rebellious child. Nobody plans for one. But they don’t just happen either. At the same time, there is no magic elixir or five-step strategy that can guarantee you won’t have one. And while we must do all we can to discipline our children while they are young and attempt to raise them in a godly atmosphere, there is no assurance that our children will never stray, never disappoint us or never become an embarrassment and a public disgrace (Proverbs 19:26 NLT).

Solomon was a big proponent of godly discipline and instruction in a child’s early developmental years. One of the most frequently quoted and misunderstood verses in the entire book of Proverbs is found in chapter 22:

Train up a child in the way he should go;
    even when he is old he will not depart from it. – Proverbs 22:6 ESV

This verse is not meant to be a scriptural panacea, offering the guarantee of a godly child if you follow God’s prescribed parenting plan. This proverb simply teaches that, while our children are young and pliable, we must do all we can to teach them the truth of God’s Word and model for them the life of wisdom and righteousness that God desires. But as children grow older, they also grow increasingly more independent, until they reach that inevitable point at which they must determine and decide their own faith and fate. They will have to decide what they are going to do with all that they have been taught. What happens at that point has as much to do with their personality and temperament as anything else. Two children raised in the same home by the same parents and under the same set of rules can turn out completely different from one another – solely based on their personality profile.

That’s why Solomon provides the following admonition: “Discipline your children while there is hope. Otherwise you will ruin their lives” (Proverbs 19:18 NLT). The day may come when your adult child will no longer accept your instruction or submit to your discipline. It will be too late.

Every day, countless parents ask the pain-filled, guilt-ridden questions, “Where did we go wrong?” “What could we have done differently?” “How could we have prevented this from happening?” No doubt, those questions have answers. There are inevitably some things they could have done differently, better, or not at all. None of us are perfect parents. We all make mistakes. We sin against our children and, when it comes to their sins, we overlook some and overreact to others. We are inconsistent and non-perfect parents.

And there are those times when our children turn out differently than we had hoped or dreamed; not so much because of our shortcomings as parents but because of the choices our children made along the way. That’s why Solomon cries out to his sons to listen to his instruction. He begs them to listen to what he is trying to tell them about wisdom and the life of righteousness.

If you stop listening to instruction, my child,
    you will turn your back on knowledge.  – Proverbs 19:27 NLT

Get all the advice and instruction you can,
    so you will be wise the rest of your life. – Proverbs 19:20 NLT

But ultimately, every child must come to the point where they begin making their own choices and deciding what it is they believe. They must choose to listen to all that they have been taught and begin obeying it, not because they have to, but because they want to. Their faith must become a choice of the will, not an act of submission to their parent’s wishes.

Watching your son or daughter reject the faith you have tried to instill in them is a painful thing to endure. It is gut-wrenching. The word “violence” in verse 26 is meant to shock the reader. The Hebrew word means “to devastate, ruin or violently destroy.” This pictures a son or daughter who has done some serious damage to their father. It could be financially, physically, or even just emotionally. They have devastated their father. Their actions have brought him down and knocked the props out from under him. And they have managed to alienate and drive away their own mother. She wants nothing to do with her own child. This loving mother and father now find their child to be an embarrassment and a public disgrace. All their friends can stand back and watch as their adult child lives an ungodly and unrighteous life right in front of their eyes. And the fingers point, the gossip spreads, and the pity is poured out on these two poor souls who obviously failed at parenting. But that is not Solomon’s point. He is not condemning those whose children have rebelled and rejected the way of wisdom. He is simply stressing the vital importance of godly wisdom and instruction in their early years. It is a warning to remain steadfast and committed to godly parenting “while there is hope” (Proverbs 19:18 NLT).

At the end of the day, we must place our children in the hands of God. The psalmist reminds us that “Children are a gift from the LORD; they are a reward from him” (Psalm 127:3 NLT). And God views parents as stewards, not saviors. He does not expect us to produce godly children because only He can bestow righteousness. All we can do is teach them the truth of God’s Word and model for them a life of faith and godliness. Ultimately, they will have to choose for themselves. They are free-will creatures who must one day choose God and accept His will for their lives. Many do, but some do not.

That is why Solomon repeatedly stresses the positive outcomes of a godly life. He wants his own children to understand that way of wisdom has real benefits.

Loyalty makes a person attractive.
    It is better to be poor than dishonest. – Proverbs 19:22 NLT

Fear of the Lord leads to life,
    bringing security and protection from harm. – Proverbs 19:23 NLT

Get all the advice and instruction you can,
    so you will be wise the rest of your life. – Proverbs 19:20 NLT

Yet, not all children will heed Solomon’s advice or their parents’ instructions. They will choose the wrong path and, like the prodigal son, decide to waste their inheritance and their life. But like the father of the prodigal son, we must continue to pray for them and hope for their ultimate return. We must turn them over to God and ask Him to do what only He can do. He alone can soften their heart and convict them of their rebellion. Because their sin, while painful to us as parents, is ultimately against God. They are rejecting Him, not us. And only God can restore them to a right relationship with Himself. Nothing is impossible for Him.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

New English Translation (NET)NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2017 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.

A Study in Contrasts

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1  The proverbs of Solomon.

A wise son makes a glad father,
    but a foolish son is a sorrow to his mother.
2 Treasures gained by wickedness do not profit,
    but righteousness delivers from death.
3 The Lord does not let the righteous go hungry,
    but he thwarts the craving of the wicked.
4 A slack hand causes poverty,
    but the hand of the diligent makes rich.
5 He who gathers in summer is a prudent son,
    but he who sleeps in harvest is a son who brings shame.
6 Blessings are on the head of the righteous,
    but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.
7 The memory of the righteous is a blessing,
    but the name of the wicked will rot.
8 The wise of heart will receive commandments,
    but a babbling fool will come to ruin.
9 Whoever walks in integrity walks securely,
    but he who makes his ways crooked will be found out.
10 Whoever winks the eye causes trouble,
    and a babbling fool will come to ruin.
11 The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life,
    but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.
12 Hatred stirs up strife,
    but love covers all offenses.
13 On the lips of him who has understanding, wisdom is found,
    but a rod is for the back of him who lacks sense.
14 The wise lay up knowledge,
    but the mouth of a fool brings ruin near.
15 A rich man’s wealth is his strong city;
    the poverty of the poor is their ruin.
16 The wage of the righteous leads to life,
    the gain of the wicked to sin.
17 Whoever heeds instruction is on the path to life,
    but he who rejects reproof leads others astray.
18 The one who conceals hatred has lying lips,
    and whoever utters slander is a fool.
19 When words are many, transgression is not lacking,
    but whoever restrains his lips is prudent.
20 The tongue of the righteous is choice silver;
    the heart of the wicked is of little worth.
21 The lips of the righteous feed many,
    but fools die for lack of sense.
22 The blessing of the Lord makes rich,
    and he adds no sorrow with it.
23 Doing wrong is like a joke to a fool,
    but wisdom is pleasure to a man of understanding.
24 What the wicked dreads will come upon him,
    but the desire of the righteous will be granted.
25 When the tempest passes, the wicked is no more,
    but the righteous is established forever.
26 Like vinegar to the teeth and smoke to the eyes,
    so is the sluggard to those who send him.
27 The fear of the Lord prolongs life,
    but the years of the wicked will be short.
28 The hope of the righteous brings joy,
    but the expectation of the wicked will perish.
29 The way of the Lord is a stronghold to the blameless,
    but destruction to evildoers.
30 The righteous will never be removed,
    but the wicked will not dwell in the land.
31 The mouth of the righteous brings forth wisdom,
    but the perverse tongue will be cut off.
32 The lips of the righteous know what is acceptable,
    but the mouth of the wicked, what is perverse. – Proverbs 10:1-32 ESV

In this chapter, Solomon introduces the writing style that we most commonly associate with the book of Proverbs. In it, he utilizes a series of contrasting couplets that juxtapose the righteous and the wicked. For nine chapters, Solomon has emphasized the need for wisdom and the preferred lifestyle that the way of wisdom provides to all who avail themselves of it.

Now, he begins to differentiate between God’s way and that of the world. He refers to the righteous 13 times and he mentions the wicked 11 times, and he goes out of his way to differentiate between the two. To Solomon, wisdom was far more than an intellectual commodity that one acquired over time. It was a way of life. And it stood in stark contrast to the more prevalent and popular way of the godless and worldly.

“Most of the proverbs in this section are one verse long and contain two lines each; they are couplets. The second line contrasts, compares, or completes the idea expressed in the first line. This is Hebrew parallelism.” – Thomas L. Constable, Notes on Proverbs

Solomon starts off this Proverb by declaring his desire for his son to choose the way of wisdom. That would be the preference of any loving father. No parent wants to raise a fool. No father or mother finds joy in discovering that their son or daughter has chosen the path of wickedness and unrighteousness. But unless those parents make the determination to promote and model a lifestyle of wisdom, they may very well end up experiencing the sorrow of raising a wayward and foolish adult child.

A wise child brings joy to a father;
    a foolish child brings grief to a mother. – Proverbs 10:1 NLT

Parenting is hard work. It is not for the faint of heart or the weak-willed. It requires incredible energy and fortitude, limitless endurance, boundless courage, and a certain degree of blind faith. Raising children is a huge responsibility that can intimidate the bravest of souls. It can make the strong weak in the knees and turn the most confident of men into sniveling, teary-eyed basketcases.

But all the same, there is nothing more gratifying than to watch your children grow and mature, making the most of the gifts and abilities God has given them. It is a blessing to pour into their lives and see God use you in His grand scheme to mold them into the likeness of His Son. It does not always go well or even quite like you had imagined or expected. There are setbacks and heartaches along the way. Children have a mind and a will of their own, and their not afraid to use either one. They can be loving and frustrating. They can warm our hearts and try our patience. They can bring a smile to our faces and a tear to our eye – all within just a few minutes’ time span.

It seems that Solomon knew well the joys and sorrows of parenting. He talked about it a lot. And he dealt regularly with the topic of the foolish child. Here in verse one of Proverbs 10, he describes two different children. One is wise and the other is foolish. He says the wise child brings joy to his father. He makes him proud. But a foolish child makes his mother sad. He brings her to her knees in prayer and despair. The specific Hebrew word Solomon uses for fool is kecîyl and it means “fool, stupid fellow or dullard.”

This is a very specific kind of fool. He is not talking about the simple fool, that child-like fool who, because of his young age, doesn’t know how to make good choices and lacks good judgment. No, Solomon is describing an individual who is stubborn, arrogant, and set in his or her ways. They reject the discipline of their parents and all authorities in their lives. They seem determined to make wrong choices. They are sensual fools, driven by their passions and obsessed with immediate gratification. They refuse to deny themselves anything and lack the common sense to know better. These kinds of children don’t just happen; they get this way over time. They are that innocent, young boy who one day turns out to be that insolent, rebellious teenager whose parents barely recognize him. He is lazy, unreliable, unteachable, and will ultimately be destroyed for his lack of common sense.

The words of the godly encourage many,
    but fools are destroyed by their lack of common sense. – Proverbs 10:21 NLT

They actually enjoy doing wrong.

Doing wrong is fun for a fool,
    but living wisely brings pleasure to the sensible. – Proverbs 10:23 NLT

And they made a habit of making light of sin.

People who wink at wrong cause trouble,
    but a bold reproof promotes peace. – Proverbs 10:10 NLT

What mother wouldn’t cry over a child like that?

So, how do we keep our children from becoming sensual fools? The easy answer is that we expose them to the wisdom of God. We teach them the truth of God’s Word. We model what it means to fear God and honor Him with our actions. But in the end, there is no guarantee that our children will turn out either wise or godly. Proverb 22:6 says, “Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.”

But that’s not a promise. Solomon is stating a proverb or maxim that contains a time-tested truth. It’s not a guarantee from God that our children will turn out well if we do our part. There are far too many examples that prove otherwise. Too many children raised by well-meaning parents have ended up turning their backs on wisdom and taking the way that leads to destruction (Matthew 7:13).

Throughout this Proverb, Solomon paints a stark, black-and-white picture that clearly distinguishes the way of the wise from the far-less-flattering way of the fool. And the descriptions he uses to differentiate the fool from the wise person are intended to make that lifestyle unappealing and unacceptable.

Lazy people are soon poor… – Proverbs 10:4 NLT

…one who sleeps during harvest is a disgrace. – Proverbs 10:5 NLT

…the words of the wicked conceal violent intentions. – Proverbs 10:6 NLT

…the name of a wicked person rots away. – Proverbs 10:7 NLT

…babbling fools fall flat on their faces. – Proverbs 10:8 NLT

…those who follow crooked paths will be exposed. – Proverbs 10:9 NLT

People who wink at wrong cause trouble… – Proverbs 10:10 NLT

And on and on it goes. Those who refuse the wisdom God offers and godly parents promote will likely end up with train-wrecked lives.

But God still calls on parents to do their part.  They have a God-given responsibility to teach their children well, to point them to Christ, and model Christlikeness in front of them. But when all said and done, every child has a will of their own. They each have to develop a faith of their own. They may make wrong choices. They may prefer to take a different path. They may become sensual fools and bring tears to the eyes of their mothers.

We can’t make godly children. Only God can do that. So, with all our effort at parenting, we must never forget that we need God’s help and our children will need His abundant mercy and grace. He alone can make our children wise. He alone can keep them on the right path. It is their relationship with God through Jesus Christ that will make them wise, not us. We have a part to play, but it is ultimately up to Him. So, we must turn them over to Him early in their lives. We must place them in His hands for safe keeping. We can do our job. We can love them, teach them, discipline them, and entrust them to God for their future well-being. We can point them to wisdom and provide them with godly counsel.

The mouth of the godly person gives wise advice… – Proverbs 10:31 NLT

The lips of the godly speak helpful words… – Proverbs 10:32 NLT

 But, ultimately, our children belong to the Lord and we must trust Him to do what needs to be done so that they might fear Him live in the wisdom that He alone provides.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

New English Translation (NET)NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2017 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.

 

Live Like Who You Are

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17 Now this I say and testify in the Lord, that you must no longer walk as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their minds. 18 They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart. 19 They have become callous and have given themselves up to sensuality, greedy to practice every kind of impurity. 20 But that is not the way you learned Christ!— 21 assuming that you have heard about him and were taught in him, as the truth is in Jesus, 22 to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, 23 and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, 24 and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness. – Ephesians 4:17-24 ESV

Paul has made perfectly clear his expectation of the Ephesian believers. They were to “grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ” (Ephesians 4:15 ESV). He was demanding that they display the kind of maturity that accompanies faith in Christ. Through the efforts of faithful apostles, prophets, evangelists, shepherds and teachers, they had been equipped to do the work of the ministry (Ephesians 4:11). And they were to busy about “building up the body of Christ” (Ephesians 4:12 ESV), so that  each of them might increase in maturity and no longer respond like gullible and easily manipulated children.

And this led Paul to call the Ephesians to put their pasts behind them. They were no longer to live according to their former standards or reflect their old way of life.

Live no longer as the Gentiles do, for they are hopelessly confused. – Ephesians 4:17 NLT

Here, Paul is referring to those who outside the family of God. His use of the term, “Gentiles” is meant to include all those who have failed to place their faith in Christ. Many within the congregation to which Paul was writing were actually Gentiles or non-Jews. But his point was that even those who were considered Gentiles before coming to faith in Christ, were now members of God’s family. They had been adopted as His sons and daughters and were His beloved children. And, as such, they were expected to live out their new identity as rightful heirs of the kingdom of God.

Paul was declaring that their new relationship with God should reflect a new allegiance that manifested itself in a new form of behavior. And the apostle Peter promoted this radical change in lifestyle as well.

So you must live as God’s obedient children. Don’t slip back into your old ways of living to satisfy your own desires. You didn’t know any better then. But now you must be holy in everything you do, just as God who chose you is holy. – 1 Peter 1:14-15 NLT

Notice the words that Paul uses to describe their former state as non-believers: Futile, darkened, alienated, ignorant, hardhearted, callous, sensual, greedy, and impure. Not exactly a flattering list of characteristics. But Paul isn’t emphasizing visible manifestations of outward behavior. He is stressing a way of life that begins in the heart and  flows out in tangible expressions of life change.

There is a link between verse 1 and verse 17 of chapter four. In both verses, Paul uses the Greek word peripateō, which can mean “to walk” or “to live one’s life.” In verse one, Paul urged the Ephesians to “walk (peripateō) in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called.” Then, in verse 17, he states, “you must no longer walk (peripateō) as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their minds.”

Essentially, Paul was telling the Ephesians that it was impossible to do both at the same time. You can’t simultaneously lead a life worthy of your calling and live hopelessly confused like the Gentiles do. It had to be one way or the other, and it was time for the Ephesians to make up their mind which way would characterize their lives. There was a real temptation for those Gentiles within the church in Ephesus to fall back into their old way of living. They were constantly surrounded by friends and family members outside the body of Christ whose behavior reflected their former lifestyle. And it was very tempting to look back on their pre-conversion life and view it through rose-colored glasses. But Paul wants them to see their past as what it was: Dark and far from hopeful. He reminds them that their lost neighbors are hopeless and helpless, trapped in an endless cycle of sin with no way of escape.

Their minds are full of darkness; they wander far from the life God gives because they have closed their minds and hardened their hearts against him. They have no sense of shame. They live for lustful pleasure and eagerly practice every kind of impurity. – Ephesians 4:18-19 NLT

But the Ephesians knew better. Their eyes had been opened to the truth and their hardened hearts had been softened by the regenerating work of the Spirit of God.

…he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior… – Titus 3:5-6 NLT

They had been transformed from sinners into saints, from enemies of God into His beloved sons and daughters. And they were no longer trapped in darkness and blinded to reality of their own sin and their desperate need for a Savior.

…he has rescued us from the kingdom of darkness and transferred us into the Kingdom of his dear Son, who purchased our freedom and forgave our sins. – Colossians 1:13-14 NLT

So, in keeping with their new status as God’s children, Paul commands them to “throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception” (Ephesians 4:22 NLT). They were to treat their former way of life like an old filthy garment and discard it. But removal of their old nature was not enough. It needed to be replaced with something better.

Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy. – Ephesians 4:24 NLT

And Paul expands on this spiritual wardrobe change in his letter to the church in Colossae.

So put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within you. Have nothing to do with sexual immorality, impurity, lust, and evil desires. Don’t be greedy, for a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world. Because of these sins, the anger of God is coming. You used to do these things when your life was still part of this world. But now is the time to get rid of anger, rage, malicious behavior, slander, and dirty language.Don’t lie to each other, for you have stripped off your old sinful nature and all its wicked deeds. Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him. – Colossians 3:5-10 NLT

Out with the old, in with the new. That’s the gist of Paul is saying. The new lifestyle that God had made possible through the death, burial, and resurrection of His Son was to be far from business-as-usual. By redeeming the Ephesians believers, God had spared them from the judgment to come. Their sins had been forgiven and their eternal life had been secured for them by Christ. And the indwelling presence of the Spirit of God was meant to act as a guarantee that God’s future promises would be fulfilled just as He had said. That’s why Paul encourages the Ephesians to “let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes” (Ephesians 4:23 NLT). Their ongoing transformation would be the work of the Spirit of God, not just the result of their own human effort.

When Paul speaks of putting off and putting on, he is not suggesting that the individual  believer has control over their own sanctification. He is not laying the heavy weight of spiritual maturity on the shoulders of the saints. But he is suggesting that they have a role to play. They must willingly submit to the Spirit’s leading as He lovingly guides their steps. That is why Paul used that Greek word, peripateō when addressing the believer’s relationship with the Spirit of God.

But I say, walk (peripateō) by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.   – Galatians 5:16 ESV

In other words, the believer is to live their life in accordance with the Spirit’s leading. And Paul goes on to explain how every Christian has a daily to choice to either live according to the desires of their old nature or in obedience to the Spirit of God.

The sinful nature wants to do evil, which is just the opposite of what the Spirit wants. And the Spirit gives us desires that are the opposite of what the sinful nature desires. These two forces are constantly fighting each other… – Galatians 5:17 NLT

By submitting to the Spirit, the believer experiences the ongoing renovation of their thoughts and attitudes. They see things differently. They think about things in a whole new way. Their perspective changes. Their outlook on life takes on a whole new light because they no longer live shrouded in a veil of darkness. They are new creations and they should act like. They have new natures and their lives should reflect that reality. They are sons and daughters of God and their lives should bring glory to their heavenly Father.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

New English Translation (NET)NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2017 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.

 

The Heart of a Child

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15 Now they were bringing even infants to him that he might touch them. And when the disciples saw it, they rebuked them. 16 But Jesus called them to him, saying, “Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. 17 Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it. – Luke 18:15-17 ESV

There are times when it appears as if the 12 disciples of Jesus are a few bricks short of a full load. And this is one of them. After reading this passage, it’s difficult not to draw one of two conclusions: Either the disciples are stubborn or simply stupid. They just don’t seem to get it. No matter how many times Jesus addresses an issue with them, the disciples fail to grasp His meaning. Even all His after-class, one-on-twelve tutoring sessions didn’t seem to help.

Before looking at the scene recorded in today’s passage, let’s revisit a few earlier exchanges between Jesus and His disciples that are closely related. First, while they were back in Galilee, Jesus had overheard the disciples arguing over which of them was the greatest. This debate came fast on the heels of Jesus’ announcement that He would soon be delivered into the hands of men and be killed (Mark 9:31). So, immediately after hearing Jesus announce that He was going to lay down His life, they had gotten into a heated argument over which of them was the greatest. This led Jesus to give them an object lesson.

And he took a child and put him in the midst of them, and taking him in his arms, he said to them, “Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me, and whoever receives me, receives not me but him who sent me.” – Mark 9:36-37 ESV

Jesus used this small, seemingly insignificant child to drive home an important point. With the pride-filled disciples gathered around Him, Jesus stood in the midst of them holding this unnamed child in His arms. He placed the one with the least significance in the place of greatest prominence. The child had done nothing to earn this special favor extended to Him by Jesus. He was not powerful, impressive, gifted, or even capable of repaying Jesus for His kindness. But the child was trusting and willing to place his full confidence in Jesus.

Yet, immediately after witnessing this living object lesson, John had chosen to bring up what he believed to be a more pressing matter. He reported that there was an unnamed individual who had been casting out demons in Jesus’ name. The discovery of this unidentified competitor had bothered the disciples enough that they had repeatedly tried to issue him cease-and-desist orders. But their efforts had failed. And much to John’s dismay, rather than seeking to reprimand this rogue exorcist, Jesus rebuked His own disciples.

“Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him if a great millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea.” – Mark 9:42 ESV

The Greek word Mark used is mikros, which means “small” or “least.” Jesus seems to be referring to this unknown exorcist as one of His children. This man, while not one of the 12 disciples, was casting out demons in the name of Jesus. He was performing the same good deed that Jesus had commissioned His disciples to do. That’s why Jesus John, “Don’t stop him!…No one who performs a miracle in my name will soon be able to speak evil of me. Anyone who is not against us is for us” (Mark 9:39 NLT). This man was on their side. 

Yet Jesus refers to him as one of the “least.” He was so insignificant that the disciples didn’t even know his name. But he was important to Jesus. 

This brings us back to the scene taking place in chapter 10. Jesus and His disciples are back in the region of Perea, just east of Judea on the other side of the Jordan River. And Mark opened this chapter by indicating that Jesus’ arrival in the region had attracted the usual large crowds. While many hoped to see Jesus perform a miracle, others had come out of curiosity because Jesus was a 1st-Century celebrity. But Mark indicates that some “were bringing children to him that he might touch them” (Mark 10:13 ESV). Evidently, parents were bringing their young children to Jesus so that He might bless them. But Mark states that “the disciples rebuked them” (Mark 9:13 ESV). These men took it upon themselves to restrict their access to Jesus. They wrongly assumed that they had the authority to determine who was worthy to come into Jesus’ presence. And this whole scene makes even more sense when you consider Luke’s account. He provides some essential details that make the actions of the disciples even more egregious.

Luke records a parable that Jesus told “to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and treated others with contempt” (Luke 18:9 ESV). In this parable, “Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector” (Luke 18:10 ESV). The Pharisee stood before God, and in a blatant display of self-promotion, bragged about his superior righteousness as evidenced by his unparalleled fasting and tithing. But the other man stood before God, eyes lowered, declaring his abject state of sinfulness and desperate need for mercy. And then Jesus said, “everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted” (Luke 18:14 ESV).

Superiority and inferiority. Pride and humility. Greatness and weakness. This parable set up the arrival of the parents with their children. And it explains why Jesus became so indignant with His disciples and demanded, “Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God” (Mark 10:14 ESV). These little ones were being brought to Jesus by their parents. Too young to come on their own, they were completely at the mercy of others. These children represented complete dependency and trust. There was not an ounce of self-righteousness or moral superiority within them. But the disciples had decided that they were unworthy to come into Jesus’ presence. Had these men so quickly forgotten the scene of Jesus holding the young boy in His arms? Had the words Jesus had spoken to them simply gone in one ear and out the other?

“Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me, and whoever receives me, receives not me but him who sent me.” – Mark9:37 ESV

Yet here was Jesus having to rebuke His disciples for their arrogant display of moral superiority. They didn’t get it. They were still harboring their own false conceptions about status in the Kingdom. In their eyes, these children were non-contributors. They had nothing to offer. They were takers, not givers. But Jesus had a completely different perspective. And to the shock and dismay of the disciples, Jesus “took the children in his arms and placed his hands on their heads and blessed them” (Mark 10:16 NLT).

The disciples had been right. These “little ones” had nothing to offer Jesus. But Jesus had something to give them: His divine blessing. They came before Jesus as helpless and hopeless children, most likely carried in the arms of their parents. Some were probably too young to walk or talk. But each one, regardess of their age, intellect, family background, or future prospects of success; received the same undeserved gift from the hand of Jesus. Each was touched and blessed by the Son of God.

The Kingdom of God will not be comprised of the successful, gifted, morally exceptional, intellectually superior, or socially acceptable. In fact, Paul reminds every Christ-follower that their adoption into the family of God had nothing to do with them. They brought nothing to the table. They had done nothing to deserve the grace and mercy shown to them by God.

Remember, dear brothers and sisters, that few of you were wise in the world’s eyes or powerful or wealthy when God called you. Instead, God chose things the world considers foolish in order to shame those who think they are wise. And he chose things that are powerless to shame those who are powerful. God chose things despised by the world, things counted as nothing at all, and used them to bring to nothing what the world considers important. As a result, no one can ever boast in the presence of God. – 1 Corinthians 1:26-29 NLT

Jesus had repeatedly shown His disciples that He had come to minister to the weak, the helpless, and the hopeless. He had gone out of His way to heal the sick and to minister to the outcasts and socially unacceptable. He had exposed the hypocrisy of the self-righteous religious leaders of Israel. He had willingly associated with tax collectors and prostitutes. And yet, His disciples still struggled with thoughts of their own superiority and harbored hopes of earning a place of honor and distinction in His coming Kingdom. But the lessons would continue, right up until the end. Even in the upper room on the night Jesus would be betrayed, He would provide them with yet another illustration of humility and service by washing their feet. And ultimately, Jesus would perform the greatest act of humility by offering His life as a ransom for many. The greatest of all would become the least of all so that the foolish, the powerless, the despised, and the unimportant might become children of God.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

The Message (MSG)Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson