Tamar

The Perils of Procrastination

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10 Then David slept with his fathers and was buried in the city of David. 11 And the time that David reigned over Israel was forty years. He reigned seven years in Hebron and thirty-three years in Jerusalem. 12 So Solomon sat on the throne of David his father, and his kingdom was firmly established.

13 Then Adonijah the son of Haggith came to Bathsheba the mother of Solomon. And she said, “Do you come peacefully?” He said, “Peacefully.” 14 Then he said, “I have something to say to you.” She said, “Speak.” 15 He said, “You know that the kingdom was mine, and that all Israel fully expected me to reign. However, the kingdom has turned about and become my brother’s, for it was his from the LORD. 16 And now I have one request to make of you; do not refuse me.” She said to him, “Speak.” 17 And he said, “Please ask King Solomon—he will not refuse you—to give me Abishag the Shunammite as my wife.” 18 Bathsheba said, “Very well; I will speak for you to the king.”

19 So Bathsheba went to King Solomon to speak to him on behalf of Adonijah. And the king rose to meet her and bowed down to her. Then he sat on his throne and had a seat brought for the king’s mother, and she sat on his right. 20 Then she said, “I have one small request to make of you; do not refuse me.” And the king said to her, “Make your request, my mother, for I will not refuse you.” 21 She said, “Let Abishag the Shunammite be given to Adonijah your brother as his wife.” 22 King Solomon answered his mother, “And why do you ask Abishag the Shunammite for Adonijah? Ask for him the kingdom also, for he is my older brother, and on his side are Abiathar the priest and Joab the son of Zeruiah.” 23 Then King Solomon swore by the LORD, saying, “God do so to me and more also if this word does not cost Adonijah his life! 24 Now therefore as the LORD lives, who has established me and placed me on the throne of David my father, and who has made me a house, as he promised, Adonijah shall be put to death today.” 25 So King Solomon sent Benaiah the son of Jehoiada, and he struck him down, and he died. – 1 Kings 2:10-25 ESV

Why bother doing something today if you can simply put it off until tomorrow? And why do it at all, if you can leave it for someone else to do? Procrastination can be a powerful temptation, and King David appears to have succumbed to it regularly. Before crowning his son Solomon as successor, David gave him a series of unpleasant tasks to perform after his death. He ordered Solomon to avenge him by putting to death Joab and Shimei, two men who were both guilty of having offended him. But David’s passing of the buck wasn’t because he suffered from the lack of energy that can accompany old age. Procrastination and avoidance had been lifelong struggles for him. He seemed to have a knack for avoiding the unpleasant and delaying the inevitable. When looking back over his life, the examples of his penchant for procrastination are numerous, such as the time when his son, Amnon, raped his half-sister Tamar. David had actually been complicit in the immoral affair because he had sent Tamar to care for Amnon, whom he believed to be sick. To fulfill his lustful obsession with Tamar, Amnon had convinced David that he was ill and needed his sister’s care. When David heard what Amnon had done, he was incensed.

When King David heard of all these things, he was very angry… – 2 Samuel 13:21 ESV

Yes, David was enraged by the news of Tamar’s rape, but he did nothing to deal with his son’s actions. For two years, David acted as if nothing had happened, leaving Tamar to live with the shame of her violation while her attacker went unpunished. But eventually, Tamar’s brother Absalom took matters into his own hands and murdered Amnon. When the news of Amnon’s death reached David, he “mourned for his son day after day” (2 Samuel 13:37 ESV), but he took no steps to have Absalom arrested for his crime.

Absalom fled Jerusalem and lived as a fugitive for three years, and, the entire time, David did nothing to avenge the death of his son. When Absalom eventually returned, David continued to put off his legal responsibilities as king, refusing to punish Absalom for murder. This lack of moral fortitude was interpreted by Absalom as weakness, causing him to lose all respect for his father. Eventually, he decided that he would make a better king and led a successful takeover of his father’s throne.

Now, as Solomon prepared to begin his own reign as the king of Israel, he found himself with the unpleasant task of cleaning up some of his father’s unfinished business. On top of that, he had his brother Adonijah to deal with. Just as he had done with Amnon and Absalom, David had left Adonijah unpunished for his crime. This ambitious and conniving young man had almost succeeded in stealing the kingship from Solomon, and yet David had taken no steps to mete out justice. By the time David died, Solomon found himself sitting on the throne, but with his former enemy living in the palace as if nothing had ever happened. Adonijah’s nearly successful coup attempt had gone completely unpunished. Both David and Solomon had allowed him to live, but Solomon had been wise enough to add one clear condition.

“If he proves himself to be loyal, not a hair on his head will be touched. But if he makes trouble, he will die.” – 1 Kings 1:52 NLT

But eventually, Adonijah showed his true colors. He made his way to the palace and approached the queen-mother, Bathsheba, to whom he made what appears to be a simple request. First, he reminded her that, as David’s oldest living son, he had been the rightful heir to the throne.

“As you know, the kingdom was rightfully mine; all Israel wanted me to be the next king.” – 1 Kings 2:15 NLT

Adonijah’s desire for the throne had not diminished. But he knew he needed to tread carefully if he wanted to stay alive long enough to make another attempt at stealing the crown from his younger brother. So, he wisely and cleverly admitted to Bathsheba that the failure of his attempted coup had been Yahweh’s will.

“But the tables were turned, and the kingdom went to my brother instead; for that is the way the LORD wanted it. So now I have just one favor to ask of you. Please don’t turn me down.” – 1 Kings 2:15-16 NLT

He appealed to Bathsheba for one concession. Having been forced to give up his rightful place on the throne, he asked for one thing in return: That Solomon would give him permission to marry Abishag, the maiden who had cared for David during his final days of life (1 Kings 1:1-4).

“Speak to King Solomon on my behalf, for I know he will do anything you request. Ask him to let me marry Abishag, the girl from Shunem.” – 1 Kings 2:17 NLT

Bathsheba agreed to take this seemingly benign request to her son but the reaction she got from Solomon must have surprised her.

“May God strike me and even kill me if Adonijah has not sealed his fate with this request. The Lord has confirmed me and placed me on the throne of my father, David; he has established my dynasty as he promised. So as surely as the Lord lives, Adonijah will die this very day!” – 1 Kings 2:23-24 NLT

To Bathsheba, this must have come across as a bit of an overreaction on Solomon’s part. After all, Abishag was just a Shunnamite servant girl. What difference did it make if Adonijah married her? But Solomon, evidencing the wisdom for which he would become world-renowned, saw through Adonijah’s seemingly innocuous request.

“Although Abishag had been only David’s nurse, in the eyes of the people she passed as his concubine; and among the Israelites, just as with the ancient Persians (Herod. iii. 68), taking possession of the harem of a deceased king was equivalent to an establishment of the claim to the throne . . .” – C. F. Keil, The Books of the Kings

This same scene was played out when Absalom had entered Jerusalem after having stolen the kingdom from David. One of the first pieces of advice Absalom received was to violate the concubines that had belonged to the former king.

“Sleep with your father’s concubines whom he left to care for the palace. All Israel will hear that you have made yourself repulsive to your father. Then your followers will be motivated to support you.” – 2 Samuel 1621 NLT

Solomon was not fooled by Adonijah’s ploy. He knew precisely what his conniving brother was attempting to do and dealt with him accordingly. He ordered the immediate execution of Adonijah, eliminating any further possibilities for his brother to usurp his throne.

Unlike his father, Solomon acted decisively. He did not put off until tomorrow what needed to be done today. While he knew his actions might be questioned by others, he did what needed to be done. He refused to allow this cancer to remain in his kingdom, choosing instead to remove the threat before it could do severe damage. In doing so, Solomon displayed a level of decisiveness that his father had lacked. Even at an early age, Solomon revealed a degree of wisdom and discernment that would serve him well for many years to come.

Procrastination and avoidance are constant threats in the lives of every God-follower.  Putting off those things we deem unpleasant and challenging is a persistent temptation for those who claim to be believers in Christ. Obeying God’s Word promptly and faithfully is not always easy; yet, Jesus said to His disciples, “If you love me, you will keep my commandments” (John 14:15, ESV). David knew what to do, but chose not to do it. Instead, he passed the buck to his son, expecting him to clean up the mess he left behind. But Solomon proved to be decisive and deliberate, wisely seeing through his brother’s ruse and eliminating the threat before it had time to become a problem.

Laziness lies at the heart of procrastination, and the Bible has much to say about those who exhibit this dangerous characteristic.

Work hard and become a leader;
    be lazy and become a slave. – Proverbs 12:24 NLT

Lazy people want much but get little,
    but those who work hard will prosper. – Proverbs 13:4 NLT

A lazy person’s way is blocked with briers,
    but the path of the upright is an open highway. – Proverbs 15:19 NLT

A lazy person is as bad as
    someone who destroys things. – Proverbs 18:9 NLT

The apostle Paul reminds us that all we do in life is to be done as if we were doing it for the Lord, as an act of service and sacrifice to Him.

Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. – Colossians 3:23 NLT

Solomon could have taken his mother’s advice and allowed his brother to marry Abishag, but he realized doing so would only delay the inevitable. In his heart, he knew that Adonijah still posed a threat to his throne. While allowing his older brother to live would have been the easier path to take, Solomon did what needed to be done. He refused to put off what needed to be done today until tomorrow. In doing so, he likely disappointed his mother, but he fulfilled God’s will and protected his kingdom.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

When Things Look Down, Look Up

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A Psalm of David, when he fled from Absalom his son.

1 O Lord, how many are my foes!
    Many are rising against me;
2 many are saying of my soul,
    “There is no salvation for him in God.” Selah

3 But you, O Lord, are a shield about me,
    my glory, and the lifter of my head.
4 I cried aloud to the Lord,
    and he answered me from his holy hill. Selah

5 I lay down and slept;
    I woke again, for the Lord sustained me.
6 I will not be afraid of many thousands of people
    who have set themselves against me all around.

7 Arise, O Lord!
    Save me, O my God!
For you strike all my enemies on the cheek;
    you break the teeth of the wicked.

8 Salvation belongs to the Lord;
    your blessing be on your people! Selah – Psalm 3:1-8 ESV

While Psalm 2 addressed the issue of foreign adversaries standing opposed to God’s anointed king, this Psalm portrays a more intimate and internal threat. David has had to abandon Jerusalem and his throne because his son, Absalom, has taken over his kingdom. The details of this tragic event are recorded in the Book of 2 Samuel.

Absalom had recently returned from Geshur, where he had been living in exile after having killed his half-brother, Amnon. The sordid details of this story paint a less-than-pleasant picture of David’s homelife and parenting skills. He had a large and rapidly growing family because of his many wives. These marriages were in direct violation of God’s command.

“The king must not take many wives for himself, because they will turn his heart away from the Lord.” – Deuteronomy 17:17 NLT

While David had managed to remain faithful to Yahweh, his large blended family was anything but a picture of domestic bliss. His violation of God’s command produced a series of unfortunate events that ultimately led to the events recorded in Psalm 3. Chapter 13 of 2 Samuel 13 records Amnon’s lust-fueled rape of his half-sister Tamar. This violent act went unpunished by David, leaving Tamar in a state of mourning over the loss of her virginity. She was damaged goods and, in that culture, would likely remain unmarried the rest of her life. When her brother Absalom saw that their father was not going to deal with Amnon’s crime, he took matters into his own hands and arranged for Amnon’s death. This crime also went unpunished by David. Rather than stepping up and meting out justice, David remained silent and allowed Absalom to escape to Geshur.

In time, David allowed his exiled son to return, but refused to restore their relationship. In time, Absalom became embittered by his father’s passive-aggressive behavior. David’s avoidance of his son only fueled Absalom’s disrespect and resentment for him. Eventually, Absalom devised a plan to steal the throne from his father. Through a series of clever ploys, Absalom managed to win the hearts of the people and pull off a bloodless coup that forced David to abandon Jerusalem and concede the kingdom to his son.

Psalm 3 was written as all this was going on. So, David was going through some significantly trying circumstances. He had lost everything, including his kingdom, the love of his own son, and the respect of his people. His world had been turned upside down. To make matters worse, his enemies used this collapse of David’s fortunes to torment him. They accused God of having abandoned His anointed kind.

“God will never rescue him!” – Psalm 3:2 NLT

Even as David fled the capital, he was confronted by a man named Shimei, who took the opportunity to berate the fallen king and accuse him of getting what he so richly deserved.

As King David came to Bahurim, a man came out of the village cursing them. It was Shimei son of Gera, from the same clan as Saul’s family. He threw stones at the king and the king’s officers and all the mighty warriors who surrounded him. “Get out of here, you murderer, you scoundrel!” he shouted at David. “The Lord is paying you back for all the bloodshed in Saul’s clan. You stole his throne, and now the Lord has given it to your son Absalom. At last you will taste some of your own medicine, for you are a murderer!” – 2 Samuel 16:5-8 NLT

These were dark days for David, but this Psalm reveals his understanding of God’s faithfulness. Despite all that had transpired, David maintained a confidence in God that came from personal experience. He knew his God was a shield about him – a form of protection from attack. No matter how bad things got, David knew God would preserve and protect him.

But you, O Lord, are a shield around me;
    you are my glory, the one who holds my head high.
I cried out to the Lord,
    and he answered me from his holy mountain. – Psalm 3:3-4 NLT

As a warrior, David used his familiarity with the tools of his trade to describe the faithfulness of God. Yahweh was as reliable as the shield a soldier used in battle to protect himself from certain death. David viewed God as his greatest defense because he knew that his life existed for God’s glory. He had been called and commissioned by God. His reign had been God’s idea and only He could give David honor in the sight of others. David may have lost his throne, but he knew he was in God’s hands. Others may have lost their respect for David, but he knew that ultimately any honor he received was from God and not from his position or possessions. God gave David’s life “weight.” In other words, it was David’s relationship with God that gave his life value – not his job, title, or resume. That is why David could sleep well at night, even when his world seemed to be falling apart.

I lay down and slept,
    yet I woke up in safety,
    for the Lord was watching over me.
I am not afraid of ten thousand enemies
    who surround me on every side. – Psalm 3:5-6 NLT

Despite his losses, David maintained his confidence in God. He knew that God cared for him and was fully capable of rescuing him. His circumstances did not alter his understanding of God. Yes, he had run away from his own son. He had abandoned his throne and was hiding in the wilderness. But David knew that God was the lifter of heads. The Almighty could revive David’s fortunes and even restore him to the throne – if that was His will. That is why David expressed his confidence in God even as he abandoned the city to his son.

“If the Lord sees fit, he will bring me back to see the Ark and the Tabernacle again. But if he is through with me, then let him do what seems best to him.” – 2 Samuel 15:25 NLT

David knew his God. He had faith in his God. He could rest in his God. He had confidence in his God. So, he cried out to his God. Then he waited. David was not going to let circumstances determine His view of God. A bad day would not alter his understanding of the goodness of God. Unexpected and unwelcome events should never cause the believer to doubt the power or presence of God. Instead, life’s adversities should cause us to turn to Him for help, hope, and healing. Cry out. He answers.

Victory comes from you, O Lord.
    May you bless your people. – Psalm 3:8 NLT

Father, give me the confidence of David. Give me a view of you that is not determined by my circumstances. Help me to see Your faithfulness in the midst of difficulty. Help me to trust You even when things seem out of control, unfair, and difficult to understand. You are my shield, glory, and the lifter of my head. Amen

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

The Inexplicable Ways of God

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1 These are the sons of Israel: Reuben, Simeon, Levi, Judah, Issachar, Zebulun, 2 Dan, Joseph, Benjamin, Naphtali, Gad, and Asher. 3 The sons of Judah: Er, Onan and Shelah; these three Bath-shua the Canaanite bore to him. Now Er, Judah’s firstborn, was evil in the sight of the Lord, and he put him to death. 4 His daughter-in-law Tamar also bore him Perez and Zerah. Judah had five sons in all.

5 The sons of Perez: Hezron and Hamul. 6 The sons of Zerah: Zimri, Ethan, Heman, Calcol, and Dara, five in all. 7 The son of Carmi: Achan, the troubler of Israel, who broke faith in the matter of the devoted thing; 8 and Ethan’s son was Azariah.

9 The sons of Hezron that were born to him: Jerahmeel, Ram, and Chelubai. 10 Ram fathered Amminadab, and Amminadab fathered Nahshon, prince of the sons of Judah. 11 Nahshon fathered Salmon, Salmon fathered Boaz, 12 Boaz fathered Obed, Obed fathered Jesse. 13 Jesse fathered Eliab his firstborn, Abinadab the second, Shimea the third, 14 Nethanel the fourth, Raddai the fifth, 15 Ozem the sixth, David the seventh. 16 And their sisters were Zeruiah and Abigail. The sons of Zeruiah: Abishai, Joab, and Asahel, three. 17 Abigail bore Amasa, and the father of Amasa was Jether the Ishmaelite.

18 Caleb the son of Hezron fathered children by his wife Azubah, and by Jerioth; and these were her sons: Jesher, Shobab, and Ardon. 19 When Azubah died, Caleb married Ephrath, who bore him Hur. 20 Hur fathered Uri, and Uri fathered Bezalel.

21 Afterward Hezron went in to the daughter of Machir the father of Gilead, whom he married when he was sixty years old, and she bore him Segub. 22 And Segub fathered Jair, who had twenty-three cities in the land of Gilead. 23 But Geshur and Aram took from them Havvoth-jair, Kenath, and its villages, sixty towns. All these were descendants of Machir, the father of Gilead. 24 After the death of Hezron, Caleb went in to Ephrathah, the wife of Hezron his father, and she bore him Ashhur, the father of Tekoa.

25 The sons of Jerahmeel, the firstborn of Hezron: Ram, his firstborn, Bunah, Oren, Ozem, and Ahijah. 26 Jerahmeel also had another wife, whose name was Atarah; she was the mother of Onam. 27 The sons of Ram, the firstborn of Jerahmeel: Maaz, Jamin, and Eker. 28 The sons of Onam: Shammai and Jada. The sons of Shammai: Nadab and Abishur. 29 The name of Abishur’s wife was Abihail, and she bore him Ahban and Molid. 30 The sons of Nadab: Seled and Appaim; and Seled died childless. 31 The son of Appaim: Ishi. The son of Ishi: Sheshan. The son of Sheshan: Ahlai. 32 The sons of Jada, Shammai’s brother: Jether and Jonathan; and Jether died childless. 33 The sons of Jonathan: Peleth and Zaza. These were the descendants of Jerahmeel. 34 Now Sheshan had no sons, only daughters, but Sheshan had an Egyptian slave whose name was Jarha. 35 So Sheshan gave his daughter in marriage to Jarha his slave, and she bore him Attai. 36 Attai fathered Nathan, and Nathan fathered Zabad. 37 Zabad fathered Ephlal, and Ephlal fathered Obed. 38 Obed fathered Jehu, and Jehu fathered Azariah. 39 Azariah fathered Helez, and Helez fathered Eleasah. 40 Eleasah fathered Sismai, and Sismai fathered Shallum. 41 Shallum fathered Jekamiah, and Jekamiah fathered Elishama.

42 The sons of Caleb the brother of Jerahmeel: Mareshah his firstborn, who fathered Ziph. The son of Mareshah: Hebron. 43 The sons of Hebron: Korah, Tappuah, Rekem and Shema. 44 Shema fathered Raham, the father of Jorkeam; and Rekem fathered Shammai. 45 The son of Shammai: Maon; and Maon fathered Beth-zur. 46 Ephah also, Caleb’s concubine, bore Haran, Moza, and Gazez; and Haran fathered Gazez. 47 The sons of Jahdai: Regem, Jotham, Geshan, Pelet, Ephah, and Shaaph. 48 Maacah, Caleb’’s concubine, bore Sheber and Tirhanah. 49 She also bore Shaaph the father of Madmannah, Sheva the father of Machbenah and the father of Gibea; and the daughter of Caleb was Achsah. 50 These were the descendants of Caleb.

The sons of Hur the firstborn of Ephrathah: Shobal the father of Kiriath-jearim, 51 Salma, the father of Bethlehem, and Hareph the father of Beth-gader. 52 Shobal the father of Kiriath-jearim had other sons: Haroeh, half of the Menuhoth. 53 And the clans of Kiriath-jearim: the Ithrites, the Puthites, the Shumathites, and the Mishraites; from these came the Zorathites and the Eshtaolites. 54 The sons of Salma: Bethlehem, the Netophathites, Atroth-beth-joab and half of the Manahathites, the Zorites. 55 The clans also of the scribes who lived at Jabez: the Tirathites, the Shimeathites and the Sucathites. These are the Kenites who came from Hammath, the father of the house of Rechab. – 1 Chronicles 2:1-55 ESV

Once again, the chronicler provides us with another lengthy genealogical record filled with meaningless names and mind-numbing details about who beget who. Yet, this list contains more than a few names that should be familiar even to a contemporary reader. He begins with the sons of Isaac: Reuben, Simeon, Levi, Judah, Issachar, Zebulun, Dan, Joseph, Benjamin, Naphtali, Gad, and Asher. From these men came the 12 tribes of Israel, and their descendants were the ones to who this book was written. Every individual to whom this genealogical record was read would have been a proud member of one of the tribes of Israel and an heir of the promise that God had made to their forefather, Jacob.

God blessed him, saying, “Your name is Jacob, but you will not be called Jacob any longer. From now on your name will be Israel.” So God renamed him Israel.

Then God said, “I am El-Shaddai—‘God Almighty.’ Be fruitful and multiply. You will become a great nation, even many nations. Kings will be among your descendants! And I will give you the land I once gave to Abraham and Isaac. Yes, I will give it to you and your descendants after you.” – Genesis 35:10-12 NLT

As this motley group of Israelites stood in the land of Israel, faced with the prospect of trying to rebuild their former nation and reestablish their ownership of the land, they needed a reminder of their covenant relationship with God. But there is something even more important that the author wants his readers to know. In detailing the lineage of Israel (Jacob), he begins with Judah rather than Reuben, the firstborn. Then he brings up a rather unflattering episode in the life of Judah by reminding his readers that Judah had a son named Er, who “was evil in the sight of the Lord, and he put him to death” (1 Chronicles 2:3 ESV).

Why would the author begin with this less-than-encouraging recounting of Er’s death? If we turn to the Genesis account of this story, we get little in the way of details regarding Er’s sin.

In the course of time, Judah arranged for his firstborn son, Er, to marry a young woman named Tamar. But Er was a wicked man in the Lord’s sight, so the Lord took his life. – Genesis 38:6-7 NLT

It seems likely that this brief aside was intended to emphasize God’s disdain for wickedness of any kind. He hated evil and was quick to purge it from among His people. The original audience of this book would have had firsthand experience with God’s hatred for sin because they had spent 70 years living in exile as a result of their rebellion against Him. So, this one-line note was probably intended as a not-so-subtle reminder to the Israelites that if they wanted to experience God’s blessings in the land,  they would need to avoid wickedness and live in obedience to God’s commands.

After briefly recognizing Er’s sin, the author describes the births of Perez and Zerah, the twin sons born to Isaac and Tamar. But even this more uplifting historical note comes with its own set of uncomfortable and unflattering baggage and is tied directly to the death of Er.

Then Judah said to Er’s brother Onan, “Go and marry Tamar, as our law requires of the brother of a man who has died. You must produce an heir for your brother.”

But Onan was not willing to have a child who would not be his own heir. So whenever he had intercourse with his brother’s wife, he spilled the semen on the ground. This prevented her from having a child who would belong to his brother. But the Lord considered it evil for Onan to deny a child to his dead brother. So the Lord took Onan’s life, too. – Genesis 38:8-10 NLT

 Tamar, the wife of Er, found herself a grieving widow for the second time. Jacob, who had lost two sons, was at a loss as to what to do with Tamar. According to the Genesis account, he was afraid that Tamar might be cursed. He was obligated to care for his daughter-in-law and the practice of levirate marriage was common in his day. This ancient code of conduct required the unmarried brother of a deceased man to take his widow as a bride. This would provide an heir for the deceased brother, keeping his lineage alive and assuring the widow and her offspring of an inheritance.

But, fearing the loss of yet another son, Jacob came up with a plan to send Tamar away with the promise that he would reward her with marriage to his son, Shelah.

“Go back to your parents’ home and remain a widow until my son Shelah is old enough to marry you.” (But Judah didn’t really intend to do this because he was afraid Shelah would also die, like his two brothers.) So Tamar went back to live in her father’s home. – Genesis 38:11 NLT

Jacob had no intention of following through with his commitment. Instead, he hoped that Tamar would return home and allow her family to provide for her needs. But as the story goes, Tamar did not forget Jacob’s promise and grew impatient with the constant delays. When Shelah came of age, no marriage arrangements were made. So, she took matters into her own hands and came up with a plan to rectify the injustice Jacob had done to her. To make a long story short, Tamar got even with Jacob.

Tamar was aware that Shelah had grown up, but no arrangements had been made for her to come and marry him. So she changed out of her widow’s clothing and covered herself with a veil to disguise herself. Then she sat beside the road at the entrance to the village of Enaim, which is on the road to Timnah. Judah noticed her and thought she was a prostitute, since she had covered her face. So he stopped and propositioned her. “Let me have sex with you,” he said, not realizing that she was his own daughter-in-law. – Genesis 38:14-16 NLT

Through a series of convoluted events, Jacob unwittingly slept with Tamar and she became pregnant. When he became aware that he had committed incest with his own daughter-in-law, he exclaimed, “She is more righteous than I am, because I didn’t arrange for her to marry my son Shelah” (Genesis 38:26 NLT). He took Tamar as his wife but never had sexual relations with her again. He also adopted her two sons as his own. But the story doesn’t end there. Perez went on to have a son named Hezron (verse 5). Hezron would grow up and father three sons, one of whom was named Ram.

The sons of Hezron were Jerahmeel, Ram, and Caleb.

Ram was the father of Amminadab.
Amminadab was the father of Nahshon, a leader of Judah.
Nahshon was the father of Salmon.
Salmon was the father of Boaz.
Boaz was the father of Obed.
Obed was the father of Jesse. – 1 Chronicles 2:9-12 NLT

Jesse would go on to sire seven sons, the last of whom was David. The Book of Ruth includes a very similar genealogical record that outlines the line from Perez to David.

This is the genealogical record of their ancestor Perez:

Perez was the father of Hezron.
Hezron was the father of Ram.
Ram was the father of Amminadab.
Amminadab was the father of Nahshon.
Nahshon was the father of Salmon.
Salmon was the father of Boaz.
Boaz was the father of Obed.
Obed was the father of Jesse.
Jesse was the father of David. – Ruth 4:18-22 NLT

The stories of Er, Onan, Ruth, and Tamar are meant to remind the people of Israel that their existence was not the byproduct of fate or blind luck. They are part of a long legacy that was the result of divine oversight and sovereign planning. They weren’t just any nation, they were the chosen people of God and the heirs of His promises. Their return to the land had been God’s doing, just as their exile to Babylon had been part of His overall will for their lives. And He was not yet done.

“One of the major themes of Chronicles is that the Davidic dynasty would be the instrument through which God promised that salvation and blessing would come to Israel and through Israel to the whole world. The final Davidic king, Jesus Christ, was the last Adam (1 Cor. 15:45) as well as the Person who would fulfill the Abrahamic and Davidic Covenants completely.” – Thomas L. Constable, Study Notes of 1 Chronicles

The rest of the chapter traces the other sons born to Hezron. This lengthy list of unknown individuals provides a more in-depth description of the sons of Judah born through the line of Perez.

“These obscure names connected with the tribe of Judah are listed for an important general reason. Most of the returning exiles in the general time Chronicles was written were connected to the tribe of Judah.” – David Guzik, Enduring Word Commentary of 1 Chronicles

According to Ezra 1:5, those who returned from exile in Babylon were primarily members of the tribe of Judah.

Then God stirred the hearts of the priests and Levites and the leaders of the tribes of Judah and Benjamin to go to Jerusalem to rebuild the Temple of the Lord. – Ezra 1:5 NLT

That is why the chronicler spends so much time unpacking the lineage of the tribe of Judah. He wants his readers to understand that they are part of a rich heritage that goes all the way back to Perez. Despite the dark blots on their family tree, God has blessed them and returned them to the land. He has sovereignly arranged for their release from captivity and their safe travel back to the land of Judah. This ragtag group of former slaves will be used to rebuild the Temple and the walls of Jerusalem. They will reinstate the sacrificial system and repopulate the land with more of their kind. This was going to be a new beginning and God had plans in store for them that were far beyond anything they could imagine.

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT)
Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

The Shame of Shepherdless Sheep

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1 After this Absalom got himself a chariot and horses, and fifty men to run before him. 2 And Absalom used to rise early and stand beside the way of the gate. And when any man had a dispute to come before the king for judgment, Absalom would call to him and say, “From what city are you?” And when he said, “Your servant is of such and such a tribe in Israel,” 3 Absalom would say to him, “See, your claims are good and right, but there is no man designated by the king to hear you.” 4 Then Absalom would say, “Oh that I were judge in the land! Then every man with a dispute or cause might come to me, and I would give him justice.” 5 And whenever a man came near to pay homage to him, he would put out his hand and take hold of him and kiss him. 6 Thus Absalom did to all of Israel who came to the king for judgment. So Absalom stole the hearts of the men of Israel. – 2 Samuel 15:1-6 ESV

There are a lot of things that could be said about Absalom – many of them negative. But he was anything but impatient. He spent two years plotting his revenge against Amnon. After successfully orchestrating the execution of his half-brother, Absalom spent another three years living in self-imposed exile in Geshur, patiently waiting to see how and when his father would respond. When David finally agreed to allow his fugitive son to return, Absalom spent another two years under house arrest because his father refused to either pardon or punish him.

As chapter 15 reveals, Absalom ended up biding his time for another four years, quietly and patiently plotting his next move. Absalom was anything but an impulsive hothead; he was calculating and resolute by nature, always planning and plotting his next move with careful precision. Even during his years of exile and excommunication, Absalom was far from idle. As he waited, he used the time to his advantage, carefully crafting his next move.

After spending two years under house arrest in Jerusalem but banned from his father’s presence, Absalom managed to get a meeting with the king. Pressured by Joab, David agreed to meet with his son and ended up restoring him to favor. Once back in his father’s good graces and with his rights and privileges as a son of the king restored, Absalom got busy and put the next phase of his plan into action. He had become well aware of a flaw in his father’s leadership abilities and had personally experienced David’s predilection for procrastination and inaction. He had also been the beneficiary of David’s reluctance to enact justice as God’s appointed judge of Israel. This young man had wasted no time in assessing his father’s weaknesses and plotting his next move.

As he made his way around the capital of Jerusalem, interfacing with the people of Israel, he became more convinced that his father‘s flaws could be exploited to his own advantage. Absalom was an ambitious young man who had shown his willingness to take matters into his own hands. When David had done nothing to punish Amnon for his rape of Tamar, Absalom had stepped in. When Joab refused to respond to his repeated requests for an audience with David, he got Joab’s attention by having his barley fields set on fire. Absalom was a doer. He was driven and determined, and when he saw the chink in David’s armor, he determined to strike a blow.

But Absalom was also cunning and clever and would have made a great politician. He didn’t personally attack David or expose his weaknesses to the press; he simply began a quiet campaign to win over the hearts of the people. He slowly and subtly sowed seeds of doubt regarding David’s leadership over them and his love for them. It all began with a carefully crafted and perfectly implemented publicity campaign. He had been out of sight for years, so he needed to repair his image among the people. To them, he was the rebellious son of the king who had been exiled for murdering his own kin. He was the prodigal son who had been allowed to return home but was treated like a stranger. As he walked around the city, he was likely the object of stares and quiet whispers.

So, to rehabilitate his damaged image, Absalom implemented a strategic plan to alter his public persona. It didn’t hurt that he was good-looking.

Now Absalom was praised as the most handsome man in all Israel. He was flawless from head to foot. – 2 Samuel 14:25 NLT

He was also a family man.

He had three sons and one daughter. His daughter’s name was Tamar, and she was very beautiful. – 2 Samuel 14:27 NLT

Now, all he needed was the trappings of success. So he bought himself some wheels and an entourage.

Absalom bought a chariot and horses, and he hired fifty bodyguards to run ahead of him. – 2 Samuel 15:1 NLT

Next, he took his show on the road, and what a sight he made each morning when he arrived at the city gate. Nobody would have missed his arrival or wondered who he was. This was Absalom, son of the king. He was handsome, obviously successful, and, on top of that, he was a man of the people. Absalom knew that the key to successfully running the nation was to win the hearts of the people. So, he devised a plan to do just that. His strategy of going to the city gate each morning was brilliant. It was at the city gate that all business was conducted and justice was dispensed. The people would gather there to have their disputes mediated and complaints heard. As king, David was to have his appointed judges and rulers ready to hear from his people and assist them in arbitrating their disputes and legal problems. But evidently, David had been lax in providing the judgment and justice a growing city required, leaving the people dissatisfied with his leadership. The crowds gathered each day, expecting justice, but walked away with their expectations unmet. But the ever-observant Absalom saw an opportunity and exploited the situation.

Absalom went out of his way to ensure that his daily arrival at the gate would not go unnoticed. His chariot and entourage were hard to miss. He also ensured that the people saw him as not only a person of power and influence but as a man who cared about their needs. The text tells us, “When people brought a case to the king for judgment, Absalom would ask where in Israel they were from…” (2 Samuel 15:2 NLT). He portrayed himself as a man of the people, who cared as much about them as he did about their needs. This well-dressed and powerful young prince would patiently listen to their problems and assure them, “You’ve really got a strong case here! It’s too bad the king doesn’t have anyone to hear it. I wish I were the judge. Then everyone could bring their cases to me for judgment, and I would give them justice!” (2 Samuel 15:3-4 NLT).

Like the serpent in the garden, Absalom sowed seeds of doubt and led the people to question David’s care and concern for their needs. Without attacking his father directly, Absalom subtly undermined his credibility with the people. After all, Absalom was there at the gate, talking, listening, assuring, and promising to do what David had failed to do – provide the people with justice. Absalom’s actions left the people wondering why David had never come to the gate.  Was he too busy to take care of his people? Was he too good to show up at the gate and listen to the problems facing the citizens of his kingdom?

Absalom was sly and crafty, and he was coldly calculating in all that he did. When the people began to see him as someone who cared and who might be willing to assist them with their needs, they treated him with honor and respect, bowing down before him. But when the people fawned over Absalom, he did the unthinkable and unexpected. Rather than allow the people to honor him as some kind of dignitary, he embraced them in his arms, treating them as his equals. Every move he made was premeditated and designed to produce a predetermined plan, and his ploy worked.

Absalom did this with everyone who came to the king for judgment, and so he stole the hearts of all the people of Israel. – 2 Samuel 15:6 NLT

An interesting side note in all of this is found in the book of Deuteronomy. It contains a somewhat obscure law regarding what to do with a rebellious son. The fascinating thing about this law is the location where it was to be enacted: At the city gate.

“If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey the voice of his father or the voice of his mother, and, though they discipline him, will not listen to them, then his father and his mother shall take hold of him and bring him out to the elders of his city at the gate of the place where he lives, and they shall say to the elders of his city, ‘This our son is stubborn and rebellious; he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton and a drunkard.’ Then all the men of the city shall stone him to death with stones. So you shall purge the evil from your midst, and all Israel shall hear, and fear.” – Deuteronomy 21:18-21 ESV

Absalom was not a drunkard or a glutton, but he was a murderer. Not only that, he was guilty of plotting the overthrow of his father’s kingdom, and he was doing so at the place of judgment: The city gate. He was blatantly using the seat of justice to plot an unjust and unsanctioned overthrow of the king. The stubborn and rebellious son was sowing the seeds of doubt that would later blossom into the fruit of revolution. And he chose to do it at the city gate, the very place where he should have been judged for his crime against Amnon. Had David performed his kingly duties and purged the evil from his household and kingdom, Absalom’s plans to replace his father as king would have never happened.

Once again, David’s failure to act decisively comes back to haunt him. But this entire scenario raises another question. Why was it so easy for Absalom to win over the hearts of the people? Had they become disgruntled and disenchanted with all of David’s well-publicized moral failings? There is little doubt that rumors had spread regarding David’s affair with Bathsheba. Most likely, the news of Uriah’s death had spread and the questions regarding the circumstances surrounding his death would have been many. The whole situation with Amnon and Tamar would not have gone unnoticed by the people of Jerusalem. The murder of the king’s son by his brother would have been headline news. And the very fact that Absalom had been allowed to return without any repercussions would have been fodder for the rumor mill.

There is also the likelihood that David was too busy with the affairs of the state to effectively listen to and address the needs of his people. It was probably about this same time that David became engrossed with the construction of his palace. He was also devising plans for the future construction of a temple in which to house the Ark of the Covenant. David was a busy man but had he become too distracted to care for his own people? It must not be overlooked that God had told David, “Shepherd my people Israel” (2 Samuel 5:2). But somewhere along the way, David had begun to neglect his primary responsibility and, in doing so, he lost the respect of his sheep. They had wandered and were easy prey for someone as crafty and cunning as Absalom. David had left a void that Absalom was more than willing to fill. The sheep were hungry for justice and Absalom was prepared to feed them from his own hand and turn their hearts away from David.

David had one job to do: Shepherd the sheep of Israel. But he had become too busy with the affairs of the state to care for the well-being of God’s flock. He had not even managed to properly shepherd his own family, allowing incest and murder to go unpunished and unresolved. But God has strong feelings about shepherds who fail to perform their roles.

“What sorrow awaits you shepherds who feed yourselves instead of your flocks. Shouldn’t shepherds feed their sheep? You drink the milk, wear the wool, and butcher the best animals, but you let your flocks starve. You have not taken care of the weak. You have not tended the sick or bound up the injured. You have not gone looking for those who have wandered away and are lost.” – Ezekiel 34:2-4 NLT

David was going to learn a painful lesson that would cost him dearly. His failure to shepherd well, by fulfilling his responsibilities as a father and a king, would not go unpunished. God would hold him accountable.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

You Can’t Judge a Book By Its Cover

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25 Now in all Israel there was no one so much to be praised for his handsome appearance as Absalom. From the sole of his foot to the crown of his head there was no blemish in him. 26 And when he cut the hair of his head (for at the end of every year he used to cut it; when it was heavy on him, he cut it), he weighed the hair of his head, two hundred shekels by the king’s weight.’ 27 There were born to Absalom three sons, and one daughter whose name was Tamar. She was a beautiful woman.

28 So Absalom lived two full years in Jerusalem, without coming into the king’s presence. 29 Then Absalom sent for Joab, to send him to the king, but Joab would not come to him. And he sent a second time, but Joab would not come. 30 Then he said to his servants, “See, Joab’s field is next to mine, and he has barley there; go and set it on fire.” So Absalom’s servants set the field on fire. 31 Then Joab arose and went to Absalom at his house and said to him, “Why have your servants set my field on fire?” 32 Absalom answered Joab, “Behold, I sent word to you, ‘Come here, that I may send you to the king, to ask, “Why have I come from Geshur? It would be better for me to be there still.” Now therefore let me go into the presence of the king, and if there is guilt in me, let him put me to death.’” 33 Then Joab went to the king and told him, and he summoned Absalom. So he came to the king and bowed himself on his face to the ground before the king, and the king kissed Absalom. – 2 Samuel 14:25-33 ESV

David had agreed to Absalom’s return to Jerusalem but had essentially placed him under house arrest and refused to see him. After a three-year absence from the kingdom, Absalom found himself persona non grata, ignored by his own father, and left to wonder why he had agreed to come home at all. Another two years passed, with Absalom confined to his home and David continuing his pattern of avoidance and inaction. He not only refused to meet his son face to face, but he also rejected his legal responsibility as king to administer justice for his son’s crime. Even Absalom would become frustrated by his father’s lack of moral courage and propensity for passivity. For him, this waiting game had become a matter of life or death. He woke up every morning wondering whether he would remain a prisoner in his own home or face execution for a crime he had committed five years earlier. His fate was in his father’s hands and, with each passing day, he became increasingly more frustrated with his untenable situation.

But what makes this section of chapter 14 so interesting is its rather odd emphasis on Absalom’s physical appearance. According to verses 25-27, Absalom had a reputation for his good looks and “was praised as the most handsome man in all Israel” (2 Samuel 14:25 NLT). He may have been a murderer, but he was easy on the eyes. Even while under house arrest, this handsome and somewhat roguish son of the king had become a celebrity. From the soles of his feet to the top of his head crowned with thick luxurious hair, Absalom gave all the appearances of a king-in-waiting. This flattering description of Absalom may seem a bit odd and out of place, but it is intended to set the stage for all that is about to happen. It is eerily reminiscent of the description given of another young man who would become Israel’s first king and David’s predecessor.

There was a wealthy, influential man named Kish from the tribe of Benjamin. He was the son of Abiel, son of Zeror, son of Becorath, son of Aphiah, of the tribe of Benjamin. His son Saul was the most handsome man in Israel—head and shoulders taller than anyone else in the land. – 1 Samuel 9:1-2 NLT

In both cases, the text’s emphasis on outer appearances is intended to make a point. When the good-looking Saul turned out to be a far-from-great king, God determined to replace him with a man after His own heart. He sent His prophet Samuel to the home of a man named Jesse with strict instructions to find and anoint the next king of Israel. When Samuel set his eyes on the eldest son of Jesse, he immediately concluded, “Surely this is the Lord’s anointed!” (1 Samuel 16:6 NLT). But God had other plans and gave the prophet an important lesson in leadership recruitment.

“Don’t judge by his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The Lord doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” – 1 Samuel 16:7 NLT

Jesse would end up parading each of his sons before Samuel, in the hopes that one would catch the prophet’s attention. But it would not be until the youngest son David appeared that Samuel would hear the Lord say, “This is the one; anoint him” (1 Samuel 16:12 NLT). David would be anointed as the God-appointed replacement for the taller and better-looking Saul. The runt of the litter would become God’s choice to serve as the next king of Israel.

Now, years later, David’s good-looking son Absalom appears on the scene; another handsome, head-turning specimen of a man who would end up capturing the hearts of the people and threatening his father’s reign. But for that to happen, Absalom had to force his father’s hand. He refused to put up with his father’s inaction, choosing instead to face the prospect of execution rather than one more day of imprisonment.

During his two years of house arrest, Absalom’s resentment of his father only increased in intensity. He had plenty of time to recall David’s unwillingness to take action against Amnon for raping his sister. David’s inaction had led Absalom to take matters into his own hands. Now, two years later, Absalom found himself enduring the consequences of his father’s inaction yet again. Whatever respect he once held for his father was gone. He viewed David as a man of weakness, plagued by indecisiveness.

It would be centuries later that the apostle Paul would write:

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord. – Ephesians 6:4 NLT

David could have used this simple, yet profound advice. The Greek word Paul used is parorgizō and it is translated as “provoke to anger”. But it can also mean “to exasperate.” To provoke someone to anger sounds like it refers to a deliberate attempt to purposefully annoy or to rouse anger in another individual. While that most certainly can be true in many cases, we can also create anger in another human being by doing nothing. We can frustrate them by our lack of initiative or a general display of apathy. David was provoking in Absalom an anger and resentment that was fed by his father’s lack of leadership. He was slowly beginning to view David as weak and incapable of leading decisively. Absalom viewed his father as incompetent to lead his own family, and would soon reach the conclusion that he was also unqualified to lead the nation of Israel.

Absalom’s growing anger and frustration are on full display in how he handles Joab’s refusal to answer his repeated requests for an audience with the king. Like his boss, Joab did nothing. Finally, Absalom snapped, taking matters into his own hands and commanding his servants to set fire to Joab’s barley crops. While arguably a bit over the top, Absalom’s ploy worked and revealed his growing exasperation with the whole situation. He had waited two years and simply wanted something to be done. He even told Joab, “I wanted you to ask the king why he brought me back from Geshur if he didn’t intend to see me. I might as well have stayed there. Let me see the king; if he finds me guilty of anything, then let him kill me” (2 Samuel 14:32 NLT).

Absalom would rather face death than have to live in limbo, confined to his home. But there is almost an underlying sense that Absalom knew David would do nothing. He seems to have known that his father would never sentence him to death for his murder of Amnon. So he was willing to force David’s hand, confident that his father would act true to form and take no action. Which is exactly what happened. Joab went to David and convinced him to see Absalom, which David did. From all appearances, it seems that David pardoned Absalom, kissing his son, and restoring him to his former state. Absalom got what he wanted, but he would not be satisfied. During his five years of exile, he had plenty of time to consider his future and plan his next moves. This would prove to be just the first step in his plan to take advantage of what he perceived as his father’s leadership flaws.

Absalom was not only “flawless from head to foot” (2 Samuel 14:25 NLT), but he was also clever. He was a natural-born leader, who possessed the good looks, charisma, charm, and powers of persuasion that would make any politician jealous. Now that he was out from under any threat of punishment for his murder of Amnon, Absalom was going to use his good looks and natural leadership skills to plan his future, which would include his father’s downfall.

It’s interesting to note that Paul gave another warning to fathers in his letter to the Colossians. He writes, “Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart” (Colossians 3:21 NASB). David had frustrated his son by doing nothing to bring justice to the cause of Tamar. After his daughter had suffered the indignity of being raped by her half-brother, David allowed her to remain in a state of mourning and did nothing to avenge her. He avoided his responsibilities as a father and ignored the expressed will of God as found in the Mosaic Law.

If a man meets a virgin who is not betrothed, and seizes her and lies with her, and they are found, then the man who lay with her shall give to the father of the young woman fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife, because he has violated her. He may not divorce her all his days. – Deuteronomy 22:28-29 ESV

According to the law, David should have forced Amnon to marry Tamar, and forbidden him from ever divorcing her. No longer a virgin, Tamar was left in a state where she would have been considered “damaged goods” by the men in her community. Her value as a potential wife had been irreparably damaged. All along the way, David’s indecisiveness left a wake of disaster and damaged lives. His inaction allowed Amnon to go unpunished and left Tamar a humiliated and unwanted woman. His unwillingness to do the right thing had only resulted in a host of wrong outcomes. Absalom had killed Amnon and then spent three years in exile. Even when he was allowed to return home, Absalom found himself in a frustrating limbo, trapped by his father’s unwillingness to perform his parental role and his duties as a king. All of this was going to lead to further resentment on Absalom’s part that would ultimately surface as rebellion.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Absolution Without Atonement Is Always Inadequate

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1 Now Joab the son of Zeruiah knew that the king’s heart went out to Absalom. 2 And Joab sent to Tekoa and brought from there a wise woman and said to her, “Pretend to be a mourner and put on mourning garments. Do not anoint yourself with oil, but behave like a woman who has been mourning many days for the dead. 3 Go to the king and speak thus to him.” So Joab put the words in her mouth.

4 When the woman of Tekoa came to the king, she fell on her face to the ground and paid homage and said, “Save me, O king.” 5 And the king said to her, “What is your trouble?” She answered, “Alas, I am a widow; my husband is dead. 6 And your servant had two sons, and they quarreled with one another in the field. There was no one to separate them, and one struck the other and killed him. 7 And now the whole clan has risen against your servant, and they say, ‘Give up the man who struck his brother, that we may put him to death for the life of his brother whom he killed.’ And so they would destroy the heir also. Thus they would quench my coal that is left and leave to my husband neither name nor remnant on the face of the earth.”

8 Then the king said to the woman, “Go to your house, and I will give orders concerning you.” 9 And the woman of Tekoa said to the king, “On me be the guilt, my lord the king, and on my father’s house; let the king and his throne be guiltless.” 10 The king said, “If anyone says anything to you, bring him to me, and he shall never touch you again.” 11 Then she said, “Please let the king invoke the Lord your God, that the avenger of blood kill no more, and my son be not destroyed.” He said, “As the Lord lives, not one hair of your son shall fall to the ground.”

12 Then the woman said, “Please let your servant speak a word to my lord the king.” He said, “Speak.” 13 And the woman said, “Why then have you planned such a thing against the people of God? For in giving this decision the king convicts himself, inasmuch as the king does not bring his banished one home again. 14 We must all die; we are like water spilled on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again. But God will not take away life, and he devises means so that the banished one will not remain an outcast. 15 Now I have come to say this to my lord the king because the people have made me afraid, and your servant thought, ‘I will speak to the king; it may be that the king will perform the request of his servant. 16 For the king will hear and deliver his servant from the hand of the man who would destroy me and my son together from the heritage of God.’ 17 And your servant thought, ‘The word of my lord the king will set me at rest,’ for my lord the king is like the angel of God to discern good and evil. The Lord your God be with you!” – 2 Samuel 14:1-17 ESV

More than three years have passed since Absalom arranged and carried out the murder of his half-brother, Amnon, for raping his sister, Tamar. Absalom fled, knowing he was guilty and deserving of death. He lived in exile in the land of Geshur the entire time and, while David thought about Absalom every day, he took no action regarding his son’s behavior. Technically, as king, David could have absolved his son of guilt and invited him to come home. But that decision would have required David to violate the law of God. There was little doubt concerning Absalom’s guilt and yet David did nothing to render a just and righteous indictment for the crime committed. For three years he failed to mete out justice for what his son had done.

This whole sordid affair had been lived out in the public eye. Everyone in the kingdom of Israel would have been familiar with the intimate and infamous details of the crimes committed by the royal family. It would have been common knowledge that one of the king’s sons had raped his half-sister and was then murdered by her brother. News of Absalom’s escape and exile would have been gossip fodder and, as the years, passed, people would have questioned why David did nothing to resolve the conflict in his own home. There were likely some who were angered by David’s decision to let his son get away with murder. They would have viewed this as a travesty of justice and a blatant display of favoritism. Others would have questioned David’s lack of mercy and his reluctance to use his power as king to pardon his own son.

The rumor mills must have been busy with all kinds of gossip and speculation. Questions swirled about David’s moods and his constant longings for his missing son Absalom. It was in this context that Joab, the king’s friend and military commander, decided to take action. He determined that it would be in the best interest of the kingdom for David to allow Absalom to return. It’s not made clear why Joab felt compelled to do what he did. There are no indications that any of his efforts had the blessing of God. Nowhere in the passage does it reveal him either seeking or receiving a word from God. So, Joab’s plan appears to have been his own idea and the fruit it eventually produced would seem to bear evidence that it was not within God’s will.

When Joab saw how much David longed for Absalom, he concocted a plan to convince David to forgive and forget. Perhaps remembering how Nathan the prophet had used a story to trick David into confessing his sin with Bathsheba, Joab came up with a similar strategy. He hired the services of a “wise woman” to assist him in implementing his plan. The Hebrew word translated as “wise” is ḥāḵām, and it has a range of possible meanings. In the Hebrew Bible, it is most commonly translated as “wise,” but it can also mean, “crafty, cunning, and wily.” Whatever her attributes, this woman’s reputation convinced Joab that she was the perfect person to help carry out his plot.

Joab concocted an elaborate and completely fabricated story for the woman to share with David. It involved the murder of her son by his own brother. In this fallacious tale, the “poor widow” was being pressured by her clansmen to do the right thing and put her second son to death for having murdered his brother. To further enhance the sad story, Joab had her add another twist in the plot that was designed to tug on David’s heartstrings. She described herself to David as a widow with no other sons to protect or provide for her. The living son was her last hope; if he was put to death, she would be helpless and hopeless.

Her fabricated story, while somewhat similar to that of Absalom and Amnon, had some glaring differences. Absalom’s murder of Amnon had not been in the heat of an argument and the result of uncontrolled passion. In other words, his was not a case of unpremeditated murder; he had planned it for over two years. His murder of Amnon had been calculated and carefully orchestrated. Secondly, the execution of Absalom for the murder of his brother would not have left David destitute and alone. He had plenty of other children and a son who would serve as his heir. David was a wealthy and powerful king, not a poor defenseless widow.

This entire scheme appears to be motivated by Joab’s desire to help Absalom return his father’s good graces. Perhaps he believed Absalom was the rightful heir to his father’s throne and his continued absence would make any transition of power impossible. Technically, Absalom was not the heir to the throne. Amnon would have been, but he had been killed. Next in line would have been Chileab, David’s second-born son (2 Samuel 3:3). And little did Joab know that God had already decided to make Solomon the next king of Israel. But Joab, whatever his motivation, did what he thought was best. He believed that by getting David to allow Absalom to return, things would get back to normal in the kingdom.

But when reading this story it is essential to remember that God had already given His will concerning matters of this nature. The Book of Numbers contains His divine provision for those who commit unpremeditated murder. God established six cities of refuge, designed as places where the guilty could go for safety until their case could be judged appropriately. But God made it clear that acts of premeditated murder were not covered under this plan.

But if someone strikes and kills another person with a piece of iron, it is murder, and the murderer must be executed. Or if someone with a stone in his hand strikes and kills another person, it is murder, and the murderer must be put to death. Or if someone strikes and kills another person with a wooden object, it is murder, and the murderer must be put to death. The victim’s nearest relative is responsible for putting the murderer to death. When they meet, the avenger must put the murderer to death. So if someone hates another person and pushes him or throws a dangerous object at him and he dies, it is murder. Or if someone hates another person and hits him with a fist and he dies, it is murder. In such cases, the avenger must put the murderer to death when they meet. – Numbers 35:16-21 NLT

Absalom deserved death, but Joab was determined to convince the king to grant him a pardon. His reasoning was simple, David needed to put the needs of the kingdom first. The woman’s story was intended to persuade David to do “the right thing.” In the “script” that Joab wrote for the woman, he even suggests that David’s absolution of Absalom would be within God’s will.

“Certainly we must die, and are like water spilled on the ground that cannot be gathered up again. But God does not take away life; instead he devises ways for the banished to be restored.” – 2 Samuel 14:14 NET

These words are a not-so-subtle appeal to God’s mercy and love; they emphasize His forgiveness. But they paint a one-dimensional view of God, conveniently leaving out His justice and holiness. God can’t ignore sin. His divine character will not allow Him to turn a blind eye to the sins of men or issue pardons without appropriate penalties. To do so would be an injustice and a violation of God’s righteousness. Sin must be punished and while Joab’s efforts were well-intentioned, he was encouraging David to supplant the will of God with his own.

As those living on this side of the cross, we know that God eventually provided a means for all sins to be forgiven. But that amazing reality did not come without cost. The apostle Paul reminds us that “the wages of sin is death” (Romans 6:23 ESV). Not only that, all humanity stands condemned before God and worthy of death, “for everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard” (Romans 3:23 NLT). But Paul gives us the good news that pardon is available to all.

Yet God, in his grace, freely makes us right in his sight. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins. – Romans 3:24 NLT

The absolution of our guilt and the pardon of our sins did not come without a price; it cost God the life of His own Son. Payment had to be made. The penalty for sin had to be paid by someone and God chose to do it through the life of His sinless Son. The author of Hebrews reminds us, “For without the shedding of blood, there is no forgiveness” (Hebrews 9:22 NLT).

Joab wanted everything back to the way it was, and he was willing to overlook the sins of Absalom to make it happen. This whole scene was the brainchild of Joab and was intended to get David to overlook the guilt of his son and allow him to return home. Yet this plan circumvented God’s demand for justice. Absolution is not the same thing as redemption. Forgiveness without atonement is impossible. Allowing Absalom to return without demanding that he pay for his crime would not solve the problem; it would only make matters worse.

Yet David, seemingly susceptible to a good story, gave into the woman’s tale and her plea that he allow Absalom to be restored. David’s decision, like so many others he made, would come back to haunt him. He didn’t seek God’s will in the matter but, instead, he allowed his emotions to get the better of him. It seems that the woman, armed with the words of Joab, knew exactly how to get to David’s heart. He longed for Absalom and was just looking for an excuse to bring him home. He didn’t want to mete out justice, which is why he had allowed Absalom to live in the land of his maternal grandfather for three years. Now, David seemed to have a viable excuse for doing what he had wanted to do all along – absolve Absalom of guilt. But while David could forgive and forget, God could not overlook what Absalom had done. Contrary to the wise woman’s words, God does take away life. He had taken the life of David’s newborn son because of his sin with Bathsheba. God had taken the life of Achan and his entire family for bringing sin into the camp (Joshua 7). God had a consistent and fully justified track record of dealing with sin in a just and righteous manner because He is a just and holy God. He is righteous and always does what is right.

David could choose to overlook Absalom’s sin, but God could not and would not. And David would soon learn the painful lesson that while his pardon of Absalom would guarantee his son’s return, it could not redeem and restore his son’s heart.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

The Deadly Result of Sin and Silence

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20 And her brother Absalom said to her, “Has Amnon your brother been with you? Now hold your peace, my sister. He is your brother; do not take this to heart.” So Tamar lived, a desolate woman, in her brother Absalom’s house. 21 When King David heard of all these things, he was very angry. 22 But Absalom spoke to Amnon neither good nor bad, for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had violated his sister Tamar.

23 After two full years Absalom had sheepshearers at Baal-hazor, which is near Ephraim, and Absalom invited all the king’s sons. 24 And Absalom came to the king and said, “Behold, your servant has sheepshearers. Please let the king and his servants go with your servant.” 25 But the king said to Absalom, “No, my son, let us not all go, lest we be burdensome to you.” He pressed him, but he would not go but gave him his blessing. 26 Then Absalom said, “If not, please let my brother Amnon go with us.” And the king said to him, “Why should he go with you?” 27 But Absalom pressed him until he let Amnon and all the king’s sons go with him. 28 Then Absalom commanded his servants, “Mark when Amnon’s heart is merry with wine, and when I say to you, ‘Strike Amnon,’ then kill him. Do not fear; have I not commanded you? Be courageous and be valiant.” 29 So the servants of Absalom did to Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king’s sons arose, and each mounted his mule and fled.

30 While they were on the way, news came to David, “Absalom has struck down all the king’s sons, and not one of them is left.” 31 Then the king arose and tore his garments and lay on the earth. And all his servants who were standing by tore their garments. 32 But Jonadab the son of Shimeah, David’s brother, said, “Let not my lord suppose that they have killed all the young men, the king’s sons, for Amnon alone is dead. For by the command of Absalom this has been determined from the day he violated his sister Tamar. 33 Now therefore let not my lord the king so take it to heart as to suppose that all the king’s sons are dead, for Amnon alone is dead.” – 2 Samuel 13:20-33 ESV

In a relatively short time and with the help of more than a half-dozen different women, David sired a host of children who eventually grew up and lived with him in the royal residence in Jerusalem. These adult sons and daughters from different mothers created a uniquely blended family unit in which the potential for sibling rivalries and domestic disputes would be off the charts. It’s difficult to imagine David’s many wives getting along as they jockeyed to become the king’s favorite, and their maternal instincts to protect and promote their own children must have produced a great deal of tension within the walls of the royal compound.

As the opening verses of chapter 13 disclosed, this far-from-idyllic atmosphere became an incubator for unexpected trouble in David’s home as one of his sons, driven by lust, raped his half-sister. This violent act by Amnon was premeditated and carried out with the assistance of David, who unwittingly sent Tamar to care for her “sick” brother. It was all a ruse and a carefully crafted plot by Amnon to get his sister alone so he could take advantage of her – and his plan worked.

Having been forcefully violated and robbed of her virginity, the humiliated Tamar went into mourning. Her disheveled state and cries of despair didn’t go unnoticed by her blood-brother, Absalom. But it seems that her father was too busy to notice or chose to turn a blind eye to what had happened under his watch.

It was only after Tamar sought refuge in Absalom’s home that David became aware of the matter. The text flatly states, “When King David heard of all these things, he was very angry” (2 Samuel 13:21 ESV). He was incensed by what he heard but he took no action. A crime had been committed under the roof of his home but he chose to ignore it. His own daughter had been raped by her half-brother, yet David chose to do nothing about it. 

Yet God had given clear instructions regarding incest.

If a man takes his sister, a daughter of his father or a daughter of his mother, and sees her nakedness, and she sees his nakedness, it is a disgrace, and they shall be cut off in the sight of the children of their people. He has uncovered his sister’s nakedness, and he shall bear his iniquity. – Leviticus 20:17 ESV

The only thing unclear about this passage is the exact meaning of the phrase, “shall be cut off.” The Hebrew word has a wide range of meanings and can refer to everything from excommunication from the assembly to actual execution. But there is little doubt that God expected action to be taken in the case of incest. Yet, in the story of Amnon’s rape of Tamar, David, the king of Israel takes no action. Perhaps he was reluctant to deal with Amnon because his sin reminded him of his own affair with Bathsheba. He too, had taken what was not his to have. It could also be the case that, as the eldest son, Amnon was considered to be the heir to David’s throne. But regardless of the reason or David’s rationale, he was in the wrong for refusing to carry out God’s command.

It’s interesting to note that after her humiliation by Amnon, Tamar didn’t go directly to her father. She didn’t seek his help or ask him for vindication. It was Absalom who took note of her mourning and came to her aid, offering her solace and a safe place to recover from the physical and psychological trauma of her experience. Was her reluctance to turn to her own father in her time of need because she feared she would receive neither sympathy nor revenge?  We can only conjecture, but it does raise questions regarding David’s relationships with his children. The only emotion he displays in this story is anger, but it never takes the form of action. Life went on as usual. Amnon was never “cut off” and Tamar was never avenged. In fact, two years passed before any kind of justice was meted out and David would have nothing to do with it.

David’s pattern of inaction and avoidance would create a perfect storm within his household. After two years, David had moved on. He had put the whole affair in the rearview mirror. But while David had chosen to ignore and then forget the sin of Amnon, Absalom brooded, planned, and plotted his revenge. He hated Amnon for what he had done to Tamar. He was also far from happy with his father’s handling of the entire affair. Absalom held a grudge against David for his refusal to punish Amnon for his transgression. He had lost respect for David as a father and as a king and, as the sordid story unfolds, Absalom will eventually stage a coup to take his father’s throne.

But after two years of waiting for his father to do the right thing, Absalom took matters into his own hands and plotted the death of Amnon. It was a well-thought-out plan that utilized deception, just as Amnon had done in his rape of Tamar. Following Amnon’s script, Absalom concocted an elaborate lie to get David to play a role in his deception. He told his father he was planning a feast to celebrate the annual sheering of the sheep. Absalom included David in the invitation but seems to have known that his father would decline the offer because of his duties as the king. Initially, David was a bit surprised and suspicious that Absalom had specifically requested Amnon’s presence. He obviously knew there was bad blood between the two of them and asked, “Why should he go with you?” (2 Samuel 13:26 ESV). But under pressure from Absalom, David finally agreed and sent all his sons to Baal-hazor – a decision he would soon regret.

Absalom commanded his servants, “Wait until Amnon gets drunk; then at my signal, kill him! Don’t be afraid. I’m the one who has given the command. Take courage and do it!” (2 Samuel 13:28 NLT). These instructions should sound vaguely familiar. When David wanted to get rid of Uriah so he could marry Bathsheba, he gave Joab the following instructions:

“Station Uriah on the front lines where the battle is fiercest. Then pull back so that he will be killed.” – 2 Samuel 11:15 NLT

When the deed had been done, he followed up with a second message to Joab: “‘Well, tell Joab not to be discouraged,’ David said. ‘The sword devours this one today and that one tomorrow! Fight harder next time, and conquer the city!’” (2 Samuel 11:25 NLT).

Like his father, Absalom chose to use someone else to do his dirty work. He would not bloody his own hands but was more than willing to take the responsibility for Amnon’s death. Both he and his father displayed a disturbing disregard for what they had done.

In all the confusion after Amnon’s death, David received erroneous news that all of his sons had been killed. His immediate reaction was to tear his clothes and fall on the ground in grief. He mourned but he took no action. He displayed grief and sorrow but did nothing to deal with the matter.

It was Jonadab, David’s nephew, who informed him of what had happened.

“No, don’t believe that all the king’s sons have been killed! It was only Amnon! Absalom has been plotting this ever since Amnon raped his sister Tamar.” – 2 Samuel 13:32 NLT

Jonadab had a reason to rat on Absalom. He was Amnon’s friend and the one who had given him the bright idea of how to lure Tamar into his room so he could rape her (2 Samuel 13:3-5). He most likely feared for his own life, believing that Absalom might come after him next. Jonadab stressed the news that only Amnon was dead and made sure David knew that Absalom had been plotting his death for two years. This news should have spurred David to action but, as the rest of the chapter will reveal, David did nothing. The very next verse reveals that Absalom got away – not only with the murder of his brother but with his own life.

When the prophet Nathan confronted David for his sin with Bathsheba, one of the things he said to him was, “From this time on, your family will live by the sword because you have despised me by taking Uriah’s wife to be your own” (2 Samuel 12:10 NLT). This statement could be taken as a prophecy regarding the wars that would plague the descendants of David. The kings of Judah and Israel would spend centuries fighting their enemies but also one another. But Nathan’s words also foretell of the inner strife that would plague David’s household; perfectly and painfully illustrated by Absalom’s murder of Amnon.

Nathan’s reference to the sword and David’s house has to do with the battles that would take place within his own family. This would not be the last death of a family member that David would have to endure. He would live to mourn the death of Absalom. But even after David’s own death, the curse on his house would continue. At the end of Solomon’s reign, the kingdom he inherited from his father would be divided, followed by centuries of infighting between the descendants of David and the rest of the tribes of Israel. This centuries-long period would be filled with assassinations, deception, palace intrigue, and a revolving door of kings.

So, David’s sin and God’s punishment for that sin were going to have long-term implications both in David’s household, within his royal house, and between the tribes of Judah.

What would have happened had David dealt with Amnon’s rape of Tamar? How could things have turned out differently had David stepped up and done what was right? Now, his heir to the throne was dead and another son was in exile. To make matters worse, David made no attempt to bring Absalom back to face the consequences of his actions. Once again, David’s inaction would lead to further trouble in his household and within his kingdom.

Sin, left unattended and unconfessed is dangerous in the life of a believer. But it is just as dangerous to ignore sin within the family of God. We may choose to tolerate it or sweep it under the carpet, but sin always has consequences. David was a father and the king of Israel. He had responsibilities to his family and his people; he answered to God for the health and well-being of both.

God is not one to tolerate or take sin lightly. Amnon paid for his sin. In time, Absalom would have to face the consequences of his actions. But what might have happened had David stepped up and done what he was supposed to do? Could this story have had a different ending if David had obeyed God and fulfilled his role as a father and king? The consequences for neglecting sin are far from negligible. Failure to treat sin seriously always has serious consequences. As Numbers 32:23 states, “if you fail to keep your word, then you will have sinned against the LORD, and you may be sure that your sin will find you out.”

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

One Sin Leads to Another

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1 Now Absalom, David’s son, had a beautiful sister, whose name was Tamar. And after a time Amnon, David’s son, loved her. 2 And Amnon was so tormented that he made himself ill because of his sister Tamar, for she was a virgin, and it seemed impossible to Amnon to do anything to her. 3 But Amnon had a friend, whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah, David’s brother. And Jonadab was a very crafty man. 4 And he said to him, “O son of the king, why are you so haggard morning after morning? Will you not tell me?” Amnon said to him, “I love Tamar, my brother Absalom’s sister.” 5 Jonadab said to him, “Lie down on your bed and pretend to be ill. And when your father comes to see you, say to him, ‘Let my sister Tamar come and give me bread to eat, and prepare the food in my sight, that I may see it and eat it from her hand.’” 6 So Amnon lay down and pretended to be ill. And when the king came to see him, Amnon said to the king, “Please let my sister Tamar come and make a couple of cakes in my sight, that I may eat from her hand.”

7 Then David sent home to Tamar, saying, “Go to your brother Amnon’s house and prepare food for him.” 8 So Tamar went to her brother Amnon’s house, where he was lying down. And she took dough and kneaded it and made cakes in his sight and baked the cakes. 9 And she took the pan and emptied it out before him, but he refused to eat. And Amnon said, “Send out everyone from me.” So everyone went out from him. 10 Then Amnon said to Tamar, “Bring the food into the chamber, that I may eat from your hand.” And Tamar took the cakes she had made and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother. 11 But when she brought them near him to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, “Come, lie with me, my sister.” 12 She answered him, “No, my brother, do not violate me, for such a thing is not done in Israel; do not do this outrageous thing. 13 As for me, where could I carry my shame? And as for you, you would be as one of the outrageous fools in Israel. Now therefore, please speak to the king, for he will not withhold me from you.” 14 But he would not listen to her, and being stronger than she, he violated her and lay with her.

15 Then Amnon hated her with very great hatred, so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, “Get up! Go!” 16 But she said to him, “No, my brother, for this wrong in sending me away is greater than the other that you did to me.” But he would not listen to her. 17 He called the young man who served him and said, “Put this woman out of my presence and bolt the door after her.” 18 Now she was wearing a long robe with sleeves, for thus were the virgin daughters of the king dressed. So his servant put her out and bolted the door after her. 19 And Tamar put ashes on her head and tore the long robe that she wore. And she laid her hand on her head and went away, crying aloud as she went. – 2 Samuel 13:1-19 ESV

In this chapter, we will see yet another ugly consequence of David’s disobedience to the commands of God. He had been forgiven by God for his sins, but that did not mean he would face no consequences. This chapter chronicles one of the many outcomes that stemmed from his violation of God’s commands; in this case, it was God’s prohibition against polygamy.

“The king must not take many wives for himself, because they will turn his heart away from the Lord.” – Deuteronomy 17:17 NLT

According to 2 Samuel 3, David had a growing harem of wives.

These are the sons who were born to David in Hebron:

The oldest was Amnon, whose mother was Ahinoam from Jezreel.
The second was Daniel, whose mother was Abigail, the widow of Nabal from Carmel.
The third was Absalom, whose mother was Maacah, the daughter of Talmai, king of Geshur.
The fourth was Adonijah, whose mother was Haggith.
The fifth was Shephatiah, whose mother was Abital.
The sixth was Ithream, whose mother was Eglah, David’s wife.

These sons were all born to David in Hebron. – 2 Samuel 3:2-5 NLT

Upon being crowned king by the 11 tribes of Israel that had formerly pledged allegiance to Saul’s grandson, Ish-bosheth, David demanded the return of his first wife, Michal. This left him with at least seven wives. But David was not done.

After moving from Hebron to Jerusalem, David married more concubines and wives, and they had more sons and daughters. These are the names of David’s sons who were born in Jerusalem: Shammua, Shobab, Nathan, Solomon, Ibhar, Elishua, Nepheg, Japhia, Elishama, Eliada, and Eliphelet. – 2 Samuel 5:13-16 NLT

David’s predilection for the opposite sex was going to catch up with him. He was in direct violation of God’s law and the fruit of those many illicit relationships was going to come back to haunt him. His many wives had given him many children, at least 17. But that number does not include the female children born to David.

Three of David’s children are involved in this story. Two of them, Absalom and Tamar, were born to David by his wife, Maacah. Absalom was born while David reigned in Hebron. Tamar was most likely born after David had moved his capital to Jerusalem. Amnon was born in Hebron as well but to a different mother, Ahinoam. As David’s household multiplied, the opportunities for sibling rivalries increased exponentially. But David, busy with his duties as king, was oblivious to the affairs of his growing household. Yet, three of his children would turn his world upside down.

David’s hyper-blended family became a breeding ground for trouble, and one of the things that will stand out as this story unfolds is David’s less-than-stellar parenting skills. He may have been a mighty warrior and a formidable military leader, but he appears to have lacked the desire to lead his own household. As the sordid details of his familial problems unfold, David’s parental shortcomings will become increasingly more apparent.

We’re told that Amnon “loved” his Tamar who was young, beautiful, and a virgin. This was more than an innocent love between a brother and a sister. This young man was physically attracted to his half-sister and he “became so obsessed with Tamar that he became ill. She was a virgin, and Amnon thought he could never have her” (2 Samuel 13:2 NLT).

The Hebrew word used to describe Amnon’s affection for Tamar can actually refer to sexual love, and as the story will so graphically demonstrate, his attraction to his half-sister was purely physical. He lusted after her. So much so, that he made himself sick thinking about it. In his mind, Tamar was off-limits, but that didn’t stop him from trying to figure out how he might have her, even as he was having immoral and inappropriate thoughts about her. With the advice of a close friend, Amnon devised a plot to carry out his lust-driven desire to have Tamar, and his father, David, unknowingly went along with it.

The one thing that becomes painfully apparent in this story is David’s lack of discernment when it comes to his own family. He was oblivious to what was going on under the roof of his palace. So, he willingly agreed to send Tamar to take food to her “sick” brother, not knowing what Amnon had planned for her. As a result, Amnon ended up raping his sister against her will. In a fit of lust, Amnon ignored Tamar’s impassioned pleas and forced himself upon her.

Tamar had begged Amnon to consider what he was doing. She pleaded, “Don’t be foolish! Don’t do this to me! Such wicked things aren’t done in Israel. Where could I go in my shame? And you would be called one of the greatest fools in Israel. Please, just speak to the king about it, and he will let you marry me” (2 Samuel 13:12-13 NLT). It would not have been unprecedented for David to have agreed to a marriage between the two of them. Marriage between half-siblings was a common practice in those days. Abraham had married his half-sister, Sarah (Genesis 20:12). But Amnon was not interested in marriage. He was not persuaded by Tamar’s warnings about the damage this act would do to his reputation. He could care less. His physical desires were driving his actions and clouding his thinking, and the outcome, as James would later write, was predictable.

…each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death. – James 1:14-15 ESV

Once Amnon got what he wanted, his “love” for Tamar turned to hatred. Having satisfied his sexual desire, he saw no more need for her. His love had been nothing more than lust and, once his lust had been satiated, he threw her out like a used, unneeded object. He took her virginity by force and left her to deal with the shame, dishonor, and humiliation that would follow. Having served her purpose, Tamar was considered damaged goods and discarded like trash. She no longer had any value to Amnon.

In humiliation, Tamar tore her robe and covered her head in ashes, a sign of mourning over her lost virginity. In that culture, Tamar would now be considered less a victim than a social pariah. It would not matter that she was the daughter of the king; she was no longer a virgin and, therefore, an unworthy prospect for marriage. She would be treated with disdain and viewed with disrespect, regardless of the circumstances. No man would want her. Her young life had been ruined, all because Amnon could not or would not contain his lust. He was a man driven by sexual desire. He had long ago ceased to see her as his sister or even as a woman; she was an object, a trophy to be won and a forbidden desire to be satisfied – at any cost.

But this will not be the end of the story; it will only get worse. As James so pointedly put it: “and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.” The most telling part of the story will be David’s role in its aftermath. How will he respond to Amnon’s actions? What steps will he take to mitigate the egregious violation of his own daughter? David is the king but, more importantly, he is the father of a household of children born to him through a harem of unlawful wives. War had broken out in David’s home. How would he lead? He knew how to fight the enemies of Israel, but did he know how to do battle with the enemy within the walls of his own home?

Sadly, David would choose inaction and avoidance as his go-to responses to the domestic disaster under his roof. He would take the path of least resistance and refuse to deal with the sordid situation in his own household. David would be angered by the news of his daughter’s violation, but refuse to take appropriate steps to deal with Amnon’s sin. David, the God-appointed king of Israel, would abdicate his authority as the head of his household and, by doing so, pave the way for an even more disastrous and deadly outcome.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

The Unlikely Purpose of Perez

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20 When Judah sent the young goat by his friend the Adullamite to take back the pledge from the woman’s hand, he did not find her. 21 And he asked the men of the place, “Where is the cult prostitute who was at Enaim at the roadside?” And they said, “No cult prostitute has been here.” 22 So he returned to Judah and said, “I have not found her. Also, the men of the place said, ‘No cult prostitute has been here.’” 23 And Judah replied, “Let her keep the things as her own, or we shall be laughed at. You see, I sent this young goat, and you did not find her.”

24 About three months later Judah was told, “Tamar your daughter-in-law has been immoral. Moreover, she is pregnant by immorality.” And Judah said, “Bring her out, and let her be burned.” 25 As she was being brought out, she sent word to her father-in-law, “By the man to whom these belong, I am pregnant.” And she said, “Please identify whose these are, the signet and the cord and the staff.” 26 Then Judah identified them and said, “She is more righteous than I, since I did not give her to my son Shelah.” And he did not know her again.

27 When the time of her labor came, there were twins in her womb. 28 And when she was in labor, one put out a hand, and the midwife took and tied a scarlet thread on his hand, saying, “This one came out first.” 29 But as he drew back his hand, behold, his brother came out. And she said, “What a breach you have made for yourself!” Therefore his name was called Perez. 30 Afterward his brother came out with the scarlet thread on his hand, and his name was called Zerah. – Genesis 38:20-30 ESV

Reading through the book of Genesis reminds us that God’s are incomparable and, at times, inconceivable. There are times when He accomplishes His divine will in the most extraordinary ways and through the most unlikely of people. Consider His choice of Abram and Sarah. Why would God set apart a man from the land of Chaldea, who had done nothing to deserve the right to be the father of a great nation? And why would God choose to make that great nation using a man who had a barren wife? Why did God choose Jacob over Esau, knowing that Esau was a natural-born con man who would go out of his way to defraud his own brother and deceive his elderly father?

In this chapter, we see additional evidence of God’s sometimes strange and difficult-to-understand ways. And as we read this story, we must remember the words of the apostle Paul: “How impossible it is for us to understand his decisions and his ways!” (Romans 11:33 NLT). And God Himself reminds us, “…my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine” (Isaiah 55:8 NLT).

Judah had refused to honor his commitment to allow his third-born son, Shelah, to father a son through Tamar, the widowed wife of his two older brothers. Er and Onan had both been wicked men whom God had punished by death. This had left Tamar not only a widow but childless. And Judah had agreed to honor the practice of levirate marriage by requiring his third son to marry Tamar and father a son who would carry on the family name. But when the time came, Judah changed his mind. But Tamar never forgot the vow he had made, and when the time was right, she took matters into her own hands and attempted to right the wrong that had been done to her.

Through a rather remarkable set of circumstances, Judah had sexual relations with Tamar, believing her to be a cult prostitute. And he had agreed to compensate her for her services by giving her a goat. Since he didn’t have the goat with him when the salacious act took place, he offered three items as collateral. Later on, he sent a friend to pay the “prostitute” and retrieve his personal effects, but the woman was nowhere to be found. Anxious to put this indiscretion behind him, Judah calls off the search for the woman and writes off his personal items as a loss.

But little did Judah know that his one-night fling would come back to haunt him. Three months later, he received word that Tamar had become pregnant, and he was furious. He saw this as an unacceptable act of immorality on her part and demanded that she be put to death. But in the heat of his righteous indignation, Jacob received a shocking message from his daughter-in-law that turned his anger into anxiety.

“The man who owns these things made me pregnant. Look closely. Whose seal and cord and walking stick are these?” – Genesis 38:25 NLT

There in his hands, Jacob held the proof of his own sin. He had impregnated his own daughter-in-law. This news must have been a shock to his system, tempting him to come up with some way to cover up his sin and save face among his people. But it appears that Judah owned up to his role in the affair and declared Tamar as the undeserving victim.

“She is more righteous than I am, because I didn’t arrange for her to marry my son Shelah.” – Genesis 38:26 NLT

Tamar went on to give birth to twin sons: Perez and Zerah. And the nature of their births was similar to that of Jacob and Esau. When Zerah attempted to exit the womb first, a midwife tied a scarlet thread to his wrist. But when the babies were finally born, it was Perez who came out first, much to the surprise of the midwife. To all those watching, Zerah should have been the firstborn. Since his hand had come out first, he must have been closest to the birth canal. But inside the womb, the two babies switched positions at the last second, and Perez came out first. He became the unexpected and unlikely firstborn. And it would be through this son that God would fulfill His commitment to Abraham.

“I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing. I will bless those who bless you, and him who dishonors you I will curse, and in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed.” – Genesis 12:2-3 ESV

In his letter to the believers in Galatia, the apostle Paul unpacks this divine promise and clarifies the nature of its meaning.

Know then that it is those of faith who are the sons of Abraham. And the Scripture, foreseeing that God would justify the Gentiles by faith, preached the gospel beforehand to Abraham, saying, “In you shall all the nations be blessed.” So then, those who are of faith are blessed along with Abraham, the man of faith. – Galatians 3:7-9 ESV

According to Paul, when God made that promise to Abraham, He was predicting the coming of the Messiah. It would be through the offspring of Abraham that “the blessing” of the nations would come. And Paul reveals that this blessing would come in the form of Jesus the Messiah of Israel.

Now the promises were made to Abraham and to his offspring. It does not say, “And to offsprings,” referring to many, but referring to one, “And to your offspring,” who is Christ. – Galatians 3:16 ESV

This amazing fact is in keeping with the way God continued to reiterate the promise to Abraham and his descendants.

“Behold, my covenant is with you, and you shall be the father of a multitude of nations. No longer shall your name be called Abram, but your name shall be Abraham, for I have made you the father of a multitude of nations. I will make you exceedingly fruitful, and I will make you into nations, and kings shall come from you.  And I will establish my covenant between me and you and your offspring after you throughout their generations for an everlasting covenant, to be God to you and to your offspring after you.” – Genesis 17:4-7 ESV

Not only would Abraham father a great nation, but from his offspring would come great kings, including King David. And the book of Ruth reveals that God would use an unlikely candidate named Perez as the conduit through whom the great King David would come.

Now these are the generations of Perez: Perez fathered Hezron, Hezron fathered Ram, Ram fathered Amminadab, Amminadab fathered Nahshon, Nahshon fathered Salmon, Salmon fathered Boaz, Boaz fathered Obed, Obed fathered Jesse, and Jesse fathered David. – Ruth 4:18-22 ESV

And if we fast-forward to the gospel of Matthew, we see that Jesus would come through the line of Perez as well. That is why He is referred to as the Son of David. Matthew opens up his gospel with the genealogy of Jesus.

Abraham was the father of Isaac, and Isaac the father of Jacob, and Jacob the father of Judah and his brothers, and Judah the father of Perez and Zerah by Tamar, and Perez the father of Hezron, and Hezron the father of Ram, and Ram the father of Amminadab, and Amminadab the father of Nahshon, and Nahshon the father of Salmon, and Salmon the father of Boaz by Rahab, and Boaz the father of Obed by Ruth, and Obed the father of Jesse, and Jesse the father of David the king. – Matthew 1:2-6 ESV

And the very next line of the genealogy provides another reminder of God’s unfathomable ways.

And David was the father of Solomon by the wife of Uriah… – Matthew 1:7 ESV

David had committed adultery with Bathsheba and then ordered the death of her husband so that he could take her as his wife. The child born to them as a result of their immoral act was taken by the Lord. But God replaced that child with Solomon, who would become the heir to David’s throne. And it would be through the line of Solomon that Jesus came. Matthew ends the lineage with the words, “and Jacob the father of Joseph the husband of Mary, of whom Jesus was born, who is called Christ” (Matthew 1:16 ESV). From Abraham to Judah to Perez to David to Joseph to Jesus.

And while Joseph was not the biological father of Jesus, the throne of David rightfully belonged to Jesus as the king’s legally-justified descendant and heir. God had chosen to bring salvation to the world through the most unlikely of circumstances and by using the least likely people. Despite the immorality of Judah, the trickery of Jacob, the deceit of Tamar, and the other egregious acts of countless other individuals, God’s divine will was being accomplished according to His perfect and righteous plan.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

New English Translation (NET)NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2017 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.

Meanwhile, Back In Canaan

/ kdmiller55 / 1 Comment

1 It happened at that time that Judah went down from his brothers and turned aside to a certain Adullamite, whose name was Hirah. 2 There Judah saw the daughter of a certain Canaanite whose name was Shua. He took her and went in to her, 3 and she conceived and bore a son, and he called his name Er. 4 She conceived again and bore a son, and she called his name Onan. 5 Yet again she bore a son, and she called his name Shelah. Judah was in Chezib when she bore him.

6 And Judah took a wife for Er his firstborn, and her name was Tamar. 7 But Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the Lord, and the Lord put him to death. 8 Then Judah said to Onan, “Go in to your brother’s wife and perform the duty of a brother-in-law to her, and raise up offspring for your brother.” 9 But Onan knew that the offspring would not be his. So whenever he went in to his brother’s wife he would waste the semen on the ground, so as not to give offspring to his brother. 10 And what he did was wicked in the sight of the Lord, and he put him to death also. 11 Then Judah said to Tamar his daughter-in-law, “Remain a widow in your father’s house, till Shelah my son grows up”—for he feared that he would die, like his brothers. So Tamar went and remained in her father’s house.

12 In the course of time the wife of Judah, Shua’s daughter, died. When Judah was comforted, he went up to Timnah to his sheepshearers, he and his friend Hirah the Adullamite. 13 And when Tamar was told, “Your father-in-law is going up to Timnah to shear his sheep,” 14 she took off her widow’s garments and covered herself with a veil, wrapping herself up, and sat at the entrance to Enaim, which is on the road to Timnah. For she saw that Shelah was grown up, and she had not been given to him in marriage. 15 When Judah saw her, he thought she was a prostitute, for she had covered her face. 16 He turned to her at the roadside and said, “Come, let me come in to you,” for he did not know that she was his daughter-in-law. She said, “What will you give me, that you may come in to me?” 17 He answered, “I will send you a young goat from the flock.” And she said, “If you give me a pledge, until you send it—” 18 He said, “What pledge shall I give you?” She replied, “Your signet and your cord and your staff that is in your hand.” So he gave them to her and went in to her, and she conceived by him. 19 Then she arose and went away, and taking off her veil she put on the garments of her widowhood. – Genesis 38:1-19 ESV

While Joseph was carted off to Egypt as a slave, his wicked brothers went on with their lives as if nothing had ever happened. It was Judah, one of Joseph’s half-brothers, who had come up with the plan to cash in by selling Joseph as a slave rather than spilling innocent blood.

“What will we gain by killing our brother? We’d have to cover up the crime. Instead of hurting him, let’s sell him to those Ishmaelite traders. After all, he is our brother—our own flesh and blood!” – Genesis 37:26 NLT

With their 20 pieces of silver in hand, the brothers had left Dothan and returned home to Hebron.  Once there, they delivered the devastating news of Joseph’s death with their father. Their carefully crafted lie devastated Jacob, but these men showed no remorse or regret. They had managed to eliminate their nemesis and were glad of it.

For Joseph’s brothers, it was business as usual. They went on with their lives, seemingly giving no thought to the fate of their younger brother. While visiting with a friend from Adullam, Judah met a Canaanite woman named Shua whom he eventually married. There is no indication that he ever consulted Jacob about this marriage, and it is probably because he knew his father would disapprove. When Jacob had been a young man, his father Isaac had sent him to Mesopotamia to find a wife from among his own clan.

“You must not marry any of these Canaanite women. Instead, go at once to Paddan-aram, to the house of your grandfather Bethuel, and marry one of your uncle Laban’s daughters. May God Almighty bless you and give you many children. And may your descendants multiply and become many nations! May God pass on to you and your descendants the blessings he promised to Abraham. May you own this land where you are now living as a foreigner, for God gave this land to Abraham.” – Genesis 28:1-4 NLT

But Judah had decided to do things his own way. And his decision to marry a Canaanite woman seemed to bear fruit, in the form of three sons: Er, Onan, and Shelah. When Er became a man, Judah arranged for him to marry a woman named Tamar. But according to Moses, Er was a wicked man and God took his life. That left Tamar a widow. According to a common practice of the time, a brother of the deceased man was expected to marry his brother’s widow so that she could bear a son and carry on her husband’s name. This was referred to as levirate marriage. So, Judah approached Onan and convinced him to do the right thing.

“Go and marry Tamar, as our law requires of the brother of a man who has died. You must produce an heir for your brother.” – Genesis 38:8 NLT

This practice would eventually become part of the Mosaic law for the people of Israel.

“If two brothers are living together on the same property and one of them dies without a son, his widow may not be married to anyone from outside the family. Instead, her husband’s brother should marry her and have intercourse with her to fulfill the duties of a brother-in-law. The first son she bears to him will be considered the son of the dead brother, so that his name will not be forgotten in Israel.” – Deuteronomy 25:5-6 NLT

But Onan was not interested in fathering a child that, technically, would not be his own. “So whenever he had intercourse with his brother’s wife, he spilled the semen on the ground. This prevented her from having a child who would belong to his brother” (Genesis 38:9 NLT). He purposefully refused to impregnate his brother’s wife, denying him the right of an heir to carry on his name. And God found this to be a crime worthy of death.

But the Lord considered it evil for Onan to deny a child to his dead brother. So the Lord took Onan’s life, too. – Genesis 38:10 NLT

This left Tamar a widow for the second time. And because Judah’s third son was too young for marriage, he convinced Tamar to wait until Shelah grew up, promising her that he would fulfill the levirate commitment. But Judah failed to keep his word because he feared that, if Shelah married Tamar, he too might die. Perhaps Judah thought Tamar was cursed. He even refused to allow Tamar to live among his clan, choosing instead for her to return home to her parents where she was to stay until Shelah was of marrying age. But like the story of Joseph’s “death” that Judah had told to Jacob, his words to Tamar were all a lie.

This left Tamar in a very difficult position. She had no husband, no rights, and, without a son, she had no hope for the future. As a woman living in that culture, she was completely dependent upon a husband or son to care for her needs. Now, she was forced to return to her parents’ home, where she was forced to wait for Shelah to fulfill his commitment to her.

The years would pass by and life would go on as usual. Shelah grew up and Tamar continued to wait. Eventually, Jacob’s wife died, leaving him a widow as well. After mourning his wife’s death, he joined his Adullamite friend again for the annual sheering of the sheep. Somehow, Tamar learned that her father-in-law was headed to Timnah, and she made arrangements to confront him there. She was well aware that Shelah was now a man and that Judah was preventing him from marrying her.

Disguising herself with a veil, Tamar sat outside the gate of Timnah, waiting for the chance to confront her father-in-law. When Judah arrived and saw her, he mistook her for a prostitute and propositioned her. To make matters worse, Judah believed Tamar to be a cult prostitute (Genesis 38:21), a woman who offered sexual favors as part of the worship of Canaanite false gods. Judah was making poor choices that would come back to haunt him.

It seems unlikely that Tamar was purposefully portraying herself as a temple prostitute, but once Judah mistook her for one, she played along. She asked Judah what he was willing to pay to have sex with her, and he offered her the price of a young goat. But Tamar knew Judah well and demanded that he provide some form of proof of payment. So, at Tamar’s request, Judah left behind his identification seal, its cord, and his staff. Each of these things would have been unique to Judah and would have been of great value. She knew he would want them back and this would force him to keep his word.

That Judah would give up those particular reveals much about his lack of discernment. He was letting his desires and passions control his decisions. And Moses indicates that not only did Judah have sex with Tamar, but he impregnated her. When they were done, she returned home to her father’s house and Judah went on his way, completely oblivious as to the ramifications of his actions. The deceiver had been deceived. And the one who had refused to keep his promise would actually be the one through whom God would fulfill His promise to Abraham. Because the child within Tamar’s womb would eventually be the one through whom the Messiah would come. In his gospel, Matthew records the genealogy of Jesu, and it prominently features the name of Tamar, the widowed wife of Er.

This is a record of the ancestors of Jesus the Messiah, a descendant of David and of Abraham:

Abraham was the father of Isaac.
Isaac was the father of Jacob.
Jacob was the father of Judah and his brothers.
Judah was the father of Perez and Zerah (whose mother was Tamar). – Matthew 1:1-3 NLT

God had allowed Joseph to be sold into slavery by his brothers. God had taken two of Tamar’s husbands before she could bear them children. God had stood back and watched as Judah deceived Tamar by refusing to allow his third son to marry her. But all of it had been part of His divine plan. There were things happening behind the scenes that no one was aware of – but God. Joseph must have felt like a helpless victim as he made his way to Egypt. Judah must have believed himself to be, not only clever but a wise and caring father. And Tamar was a spurned woman in search of revenge and restitution for the injustices she had endured. But little did any of them know that God was orchestrating every facet of their lives – for their good and His glory.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

New English Translation (NET)NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2017 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.